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Not sure how to approach a situation


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I have been friends with a woman at work for about 18 months, I helped train her in the job and we got to know each other through that, we only see each other at work and work socials however we used to constantly text and e-mail each other and both know a lot of personal things about the other.

I developed feelings for this woman and asked her out, she turned me down citing a lack of chemistry between us. My immaturity and insecurities led me to question our friendship as a whole and I began trying to push her into telling me what I wanted to hear by questioning her constantly, she felt bullied and decided she no longer wanted my friendship, and we were only ever work friends anyway.

Over time wounds seem to be healed and we are back on track to where when we are on the same shifts we travel in together, talk a lot at work and when either of us work in another area we e-mail each other, these days usually I instigate the contact. But early in the friendship it was a lot more lopsided towards her.

A big part of me wants to just go with the flow and take things as they come, but a nagging doubt exists that now her anger towards me has reduced she is appeasing me to keep things at work sweet.

I did a lot of thinking in the aftermath of my mentioned behaviour and I didn't like what I saw, its not the person I want to be or thought I was, I hope I have learned from the mistakes I made and I really appreciate her friendship for what it is, she is a beautiful woman a kind, generous person with strong beliefs and morals which is something I really respect.

The question is: Do I say these things to her? And risk alienating her again? Or do I just go with the flow and see where it takes us?


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