Long distance

[washingtongirl85]

My boyfriend of almost two years and I are on the verge of a break up. For the past couple days we've been arguing a lot (over the course of the relationship there have been many fights). I am away temporarily for job training in another state. Currently we've been having arguments about how much time we spend talking. He thinks its fine to talk for a little bit. I on the other hand would prefer to talk for longer periods of time.. We already don't get to talk as much since we're both really busy during the day and there is a 2 hr time difference between us.

 

He argues that he will not talk to me on the phone as much as I want to. A friend of his is in town and is staying with him which means he has even more reason not to want to talk to me. He goes out during the weekends and like I mentioned before is generally pretty busy during the weekday due to work.

 

We used to talk a lot more before his friend came into town. But now all he wants to do is spend time with this guy.

 

Am I over reacting? Should we not rely so much on talking on the phone? It seems to be all we have at the moment since were apart and will be for the next 2 months, which is why it means so much to me. Or is this a sign that he is not that interested in this relationship as much?

 

He calls me controlling because all I want to do when were both off (from work) is talk. He says I want all his time and I can't have it.

 

The argument has escalated a lot and now we're talking about it just not working out at all. Is it best to just end it? Has anyone experienced this before. I feel we've been together for so long to let something like this ruin it.

 

Thanks for the help..

[DN]

How much time do you want from him on a daily basis?

[washingtongirl85]

i usually would like to talk to him until i go to sleep. so maybe on average 2 hours between 8 and maybe 10pm. its not just the time, its the content of our conversations. they were usually great. until recently all we've been doing is arguing.

 

he is breaking up with me today. he says he is doing this for me and wants me to be happy. i just can't believe its all happening like this, while i'm away. i want this to work

[DN]

I have to say that I could not talk to someone, no matter how close, for two hours on the phone every evening. That is a huge time commitment.

 

And for him to ignore his friend - his guest - for two hours every evening would be incredibly rude.

[finalcloud13]

It's true. I used to talk to my ex for hours upon end, but it happens, you run out of things to talk about, and if you continuously forcibly try to keep talking for a long time, then it starts to become a chore, and the stress builds up.