Feeling a little...???

[Gracelove]

Today I helped my friend move into her apartment.

She's 27 and I'm 24.

 

I think I'm feeling a little down about the future.

 

The plan is for me to live at home for 2 to 3 more years in order to save enough money for a house and a car.

 

For some reason I have a lot of anxiety. 2 to 3 years, seems like an extremely long time for me.

I don't like the idea of living with my parents for that long.

 

I try to tell myself, that if I live for another 40 years, the 2 or 3 years I spent with my parents won't mean much of anything.

 

I don't know, I just feel so stressed.

 

I want the freedom, but it would be smarter for me to live here and save.

 

Being out on my own, independent....it's something I miss.

And I've never been fully independent, because even in college I wasn't paying for everything.

 

I try to tell myself that in 3 years I'll be as old as my friend is now, and that it's not that long at all.

 

After I save money in the state where I'm living, I plan on moving to another state where the cost of living is much cheaper.

 

And then I think about having my own house. When you buy a house, the intention is that you'll be living in that area for a VERY long time.

 

And then, what about bachelors? I mean, how do I know that there will be someone decent in the state I'm living in.

 

I think I'm afraid of what the future may hold. College was the first time I had any independence. I liked the independence, but then there were so many things I didn't know. And I didn't.......

 

I don't know....

 

I mean, I think my plan is very good...I think I'm afraid of being bored, and lonely also.

 

Where I live, I have lots of friends, but if I move out-of-state, then I won't know anyone.

 

I guess I just have some fears. I mean, where will I be in three years? Will I be happy?

[Kiwi_Sweet]

Don't come down on yourself. You'll just get all worked up for nothing.

 

When I lived with people, I always felt like I was a burden on them. Gaining independence is not an easy thing to do. Some people never stop relying on their family for support. I get the feeling you WON'T be one of those people. You seem to have a game plan. I have confidence that you will bloom in the next couple of years. =)...

 

I put money on it.=)

[Gracelove]

Fruitylips1

 

Awww!!! Thank you so much!!! That is so sweet of you!!!

 

I'm feeling better now. I guess that sometimes you have dreams you know? And sometimes you wonder if or when they'll ever come true.

 

Like when you really want something right now, but you have to wait, work, and save for it. I've done that before, short term, but a house is something so huge.

 

I guess sometimes I just get nervous about the future.

 

Thanks so much for your kind words, they really made me feel so much better.

 

Sincerely,

 

Grace

[tylercdurden2004]

Whats more important to you. Your freedom or having a house and a car?

 

Is there no way you can save money for a house and a car by living on your own? Even if you save that money in 2-3 years time something could come up and you may not have the chance to live on your own.

 

Makign choices out of fear is rarely a good basis for decisions. Have you explored all options?

[Gracelove]

Tylercdurden2004

 

Hey There!!! Thanks so very much for your reply!

 

I realized today, that I was really afraid of just missing out on time. Feeling, a little behind by choosing to save you know?

 

But I realized I don't have to feel that way.

Sometimes I get in the habit of putting my life on hold you know? Like, holding my breath.

 

So I realized, I can still have fun and do all of the things I want to do. During the 3 years time. I'll be working, developing relationships, hanging out with friends, volunteering, etc.

 

So I can still have fun and be free.

 

However, I really want to take advantage of this oportunity. My parents are so kind to consider letting me live here this long.

 

I'll have to make sacrifices of course, but it's worth it in the long run. Owning your own home, is a wonderful thing. It's security. And then being able to buy a nice car without needing a loan....stuff like that....it's really good.

 

Three years will fly by, and I really believe that all of my sacrifices will pay off.

 

I even looked at beautiful homes in the areas I want to live, and I'll be able to afford those homes in a few years, and it feels great to know that.

 

You are totally right, making choices out of fear is the worst thing you can do. And I think I've quieted that fear a bit.

 

I really love my plan, but I was afraid I'd become stir crazy! But working two jobs will keep me so busy, that I won't have time to become stir crazy.

 

Sometimes I become afraid of making my own plans and sticking to them. Because growing up, all of my decisions were made for me. So I still have a little residual fear left over from that.

 

Thanks so much for your advice!

 

Sincerely,

 

Grace

[tylercdurden2004]

'ats the spirit!