FOR ALL YOU MEN!!!

[mermayd]

This originated as a reply to somone's post, however, I believe that it applies to many of the situations that I read about...

I have a good friend who is funny, charming, and not bad looking at all...but has never had a gf.We cant understand why...other than the fact that he is too picky and disregards anyone that shows an interest or he is too intimidated to make a move and JUST ASK HER OUT. My suggestion to you is to A) not think that you are abnormal, B) don't let the girl know within the first few dates or even at all that you have never had a gf...it really none of her business anyway, and C) find a girl that you are interested in, maybe in one of you classes and think of a reason to talk to her.

In my time on this site, I have learned that the biggest problem with guys going for girls is that they are too scared. well, listen to me...I am a girl, a chick, a female, a woman, whatever you wanna call me, I represent a lot of the Venicians out there when I say this: GET SOME BALLS!!! I dont mean this in an offensive way in any means, all I mean by it is that a woman is intrigued and becomes interested in a guy a lot of the time when a guy comes up to her and catches her off guard and asks her out. Even if they say no at first...keep talking to her and she WILL become interested to some extent...even if it is just to be friends, you still gained...just don't give up!!! TRUST ME!!!

I I replied to your post but I am copying it and making it a separate post as well because I KNOW there are other guys out there that need this advice as well! GOOD LUCK!

[Santa]

You are so right!

[quietgrl]

right on mermayd!!!(clapping)

[coooolsome]

Men should read your post because its one reason women love men who are confident. A confident man will go for what he wants. Go and ask out the girl, the worst thing that can happen is you don't and you could have met an amazing person. Her saying "no" is not the worst thing that can happen. The fact that you never tried is the worst.

 

Also, tell your friend to go and read diggitydoggs post on this site. Its in his signature and have him read it 5 times until it hits him. Then maybe have him read some of his other posts too.

[Locke2121]

Balls are one thing, guts are another.

[Altruist]

From all similar threads that I have read it seems there is a consensus that what women want in a man is CONFIDENCE guys.

[TiredMan]

Or the woman can stop playing games with the little hints and body language and get some courage of her own and ask the guy out.

[zerohalo]

Or the woman can stop playing games with the little hints and body language and get some courage of her own and ask the guy out.

I knew that was coming from you, TM.

 

And honestly, I don't really disagree.

[quietgrl]

From all similar threads that I have read it seems there is a consensus that what women want in a man is CONFIDENCE guys.

 

Yes yes yes!

[g1234567890h]

And here's a piece of advice for women.

 

If you see a guy you want, GO AFTER HIM.

 

That's what my girlfriend did for me. I don't have a problem with self confidence, self esteem, or anything, I just didn't know she liked me. It really goes both ways.

[quietgrl]

Or the woman can stop playing games with the little hints and body language and get some courage of her own and ask the guy out.

 

Some women play games

[TiredMan]

I knew that was coming from you, TM.

 

And honestly, I don't really disagree.

 

if I see it, i'm gonna comment on it. When I read comments like that, I react the same as others would if I posted threads saying something like "women belong in the home and should do whatever the man wants"

[TiredMan]

Some women play games

 

ANY woman who likes a guy and doesn't tell him but relies on "body language or hinting or signs" is playing one.

[EvaGina]

This goes both ways.

I dont think its fair to tell men to "grow balls" when they might be petrified.

I get annoyed at all the threads on the same topic, men not taking the leap and all.. but women do the same thing.

 

And to be honest, a lot of women dont HELP the whole "walk up and talk to her thing". They tend to hang out in groups, which doesnt help being approached.

 

ANY woman who likes a guy and doesn't tell him but relies on "body language or hinting or signs" is playing one.

seeing as body language was the only way we communicated for millions of years, its quite acceptable.

 

point in case: your in a bar with a lady, and she verbally tells you shes attracted to you. Would you believe her if she wouldnt face towards you and leant away from you if you tried to talk to her?

[TiredMan]

And what was acceptible for so long can and should change. Man it was acceptible for a long time to own other people in this country too.

 

But can you imagine a guy liking a woman in a bar? And just throwing body signs at her instead of walking up to her?

 

if I am in a bar with a lady and she likes me, if she doesn't tell me, it's not gonna happen. It's that simple.

[EvaGina]

And what was acceptible for so long can and should change. Man it was acceptible for a long time to own other people in this country too.

 

But can you imagine a guy liking a woman in a bar? And just throwing body signs at her instead of walking up to her?

 

if I am in a bar with a lady and she likes me, if she doesn't tell me, it's not gonna happen. It's that simple.

 

Its called MODERATION...

Men and women use body language to ~indicate~ interest, BOTH genders do it.

after that its up to either party to initiate contact. it shouldnt be a gender issue at all, its just who happens to do it first.

 

But no one (sober, anyways) is going to approach a person who hasnt indicated ANY interest using body language.

[TiredMan]

Its called MODERATION...

Men and women use body language to ~indicate~ interest, BOTH genders do it.

after that its up to either party to initiate contact. it shouldnt be a gender issue at all, its just who happens to do it first.

 

But no one (sober, anyways) is going to approach a person who hasnt indicated ANY interest using body language.

 

Are you serious? So many men out there just walk up to a girl and talk to them just because they think they are good looking. It happens ALL THE TIME.

 

Man i saw it happen 2 times today (once on the train, once outside a store).

 

But there are also many women out there who just will not ask a guy out and expect the man to do it. And for those who might, it's very rare.

[EvaGina]

Are you serious? So many men out there just walk up to a girl and talk to them just because they think they are good looking. It happens ALL THE TIME.

 

Well then those men are shallow... how can you expect a result from that? its pretty sleazy.

I know its natural and all, but it hardly deserves mentioning in this instance.

 

But there are also many women out there who just will not ask a guy out and expect the man to do it. And for those who might, it's very rare.

 

and I think that should change... which is what I am saying.... gender shouldnt come into it.

Then again, SOME men like their women docile and virginial... which hardly helps the situation, does it?

 

(I have been the chaser and the chasee, I prefer neither)

[TiredMan]

That is the norm though. Men ask out women all the time out of nowhere. I don't like it but I would be foolish not to admit that it happens all the time.

 

Gender shouldn't come into it. I agree but it DOES. There are woman who won't go out with a guy unless he asks. Who won't marry a guy unless he asks. I'm not talking about a few. I'm talking about many. I would even say most.

 

yes some men do and there is nothing wrong with that. other than to people who obviously are ashamed because they have been around.

[kamurj]

I removed few posts from this thread. Everyone lets please be respectful and try to disagree without insulting.

 

If you are being harassed through pms, posts please let us know instead of taking it into the public forums.

[TiredMan]

And here's a piece of advice for women.

 

If you see a guy you want, GO AFTER HIM.

 

That's what my girlfriend did for me. I don't have a problem with self confidence, self esteem, or anything, I just didn't know she liked me. It really goes both ways.

 

Well said umm Q (no way I'm typing that screename out) lol.

[quietgrl]

Well said umm Q (no way I'm typing that screename out) lol.

 

I agree with g1234567890h and Tiredman .

[g1234567890h]

Studies have shown that girls are better at communicating than men are. I won't really say if that's true or not, but in my experience women are really good at communicating, so good in fact, that they think men communicate just as effectively. So if a girl likes a guy she'll give him hints. Sorry, ladies, men happen to be morons when it comes to hints. During the entire semester my girlfriend tried to hint that she liked me, responding to me during class, trying to sit by me, and approaching me after class. It really didn't work. Near the end when we finally figured out that we were both single she came up to me and asked me on a date. Yeah, if a girl wants a guy she'll have to hit him over the head with it.

[quietgrl]

I've approah a man before and let's say this man wasn't use to a woman approachig him.this guy didn't call me so it's important that you approach a confident man.