Please some male ADVICE .. or female..advice.....

[angela12]

So, here I go , I met this guy off facebook before the new year. we started talking and I was moving into his state for work so i thought that we would start talking on the phone now and then emailing etc. anyway i ran into him at some concert i went to when i had moved interstate. I recognised him but didnt say anything to him because it might have looked a bit creepy, he didnt see me.

Anyway we finally met and we had a few too many wines and one thing led to another... I swore he wouldnt call me again.. to my surprise he did.. I am 25 and he is 23 ... Anyway so then he was calling every day.. texting etc. This has been going on for two weeks. Thing is he hasnt ever asked me out anywhere... I think the cold harsh reality is that he is looking for a 'buddy' to have fun with. but the excessive late night conversations about our cats LOL and other interesting things makes me think this could be something more.

Anyway today I cracked... I told him that I maybe had other feelings for him and he said that it was sweet? and he 'goes with the flow' on things like this and if the right girl came along she would have to smack him on the head for him to realise she was the right girl. I was so embaressed after the conversation that we had I apologised to him. I asked him what would happen if I became attached as such and he said he didnt know ... But what I dont understand is why all the phonecalls..? the texts ? I mean I know I have seen him twice and he is busy and so am i, BUT if he did like me shouldnt he be doing anything to see me? Not penciling me in when he can? Thats what I think anyway? I could be wrong?

I need some advice bad, I am meant to see him tomorrow briefly to give him some vitamins he wanted that I could get from work that he couldnt find. I dont know how to react tomorrow. I feel silly opening up to him but I couldnt hold it in anymore..

[DN]

Tell him that you are going to metaphorically smack him in the head - if he doesn't realise you are, or could easily be, the right girl then it will be time for you to move on.

[Censored]

Some people, men and women, thrive on attention from others as an ego boost.

I think as opposed to opening up as you did, it may have been better to simply ask him out somewhere.

 

Of course, you can still do this, and back it off a little bit. I am assunimg one thing lead to another means that you slept with him?

 

Anyway, back it off a little on the emotional feeling conversations and see if you cannot regain some "intigue" for him.

 

It may be too that he was simply looking for some fun and a hook-up.

 

Hard to tell unless you go NC and see if he contacts you.

[rs.dallaire]

Some people, men and women, thrive on attention from others as an ego boost.

I think as opposed to opening up as you did, it may have been better to simply ask him out somewhere.

 

Of course, you can still do this, and back it off a little bit. I am assunimg one thing lead to another means that you slept with him?

 

Anyway, back it off a little on the emotional feeling conversations and see if you cannot regain some "intigue" for him.

 

It may be too that he was simply looking for some fun and a hook-up.

 

Hard to tell unless you go NC and see if he contacts you.

 

I couldn't have put this in better words. This is exactly it.

 

Leave your feelings out of the picture until you actually date the guy.

[glegend]

Maybe he was looking for a best friend? Maybe he is just shy to ask you out? Maybe he only sees you as a friend and nothing more then a friend? Maybe there is something about you in person that he doesn't like kinds like a pet peeve.

 

If you really want to start a relationship with him why not ask him out yourself?

[AdviceQueen]

Actions speak louder than words. If the guy is interested in you, he will make the effort to see you, period. If he's not making any effort to see you, he's either lazy, looking for a bed buddy, immature, or simply not all that interested in you. If he's not making any effort, move on. Do you really want a guy that you have to push into it? Or do you want a guy who meets you and says to himself, "wow...I really like this girl" and takes action to see you. I'm thinking you should go for the latter. ;-)