skold12 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 So My ex and I started talking again about 3 months ago, give or take. We had dated for 5 years and broke up, and then we didnt talk for nearly 3 years. So, her coming back into my life became awesome, and It felt great to have her back in my life. We would talk of old times, things that have happened to us, and all that stuff. I began to start to fall for her agian, and made sure to tell her awhile ago, just to be fair and honest, and then I told her that would be the last I time I would mention this to her. So time continued on, and eventuly we kissed. I thought it might have been something much more, but to her, it wasnt, she just wanted to kiss me, nothing more. So I just wrote it off, and kept going on. We then had "relations" one night, which was akward and uncomfertable, and she even wrote that off to a point. So time continues on, and I meet a girl.(Which I had posted before on E) I truly am have strong feelings for this girl, and we have an awesome time together. When I go to tell my ex this (she is my best friend after all), she drops the love bomb on me, and tells me that we should be going out. Long story short, we spend a few days of talking and tell her that I just cant love her like she wants, and that I dont think this is fair to anyone whats going on. She tries to make me make a choice, which I thought was fair enough, but the fact of the matter was I already had strong feelings for this girl, and that I just couldnt be what she wanted me to be. That I respect out rebuilt friendship way to much to throw it out on another chance at going out agian. That I wish she would respect that and understand this. Well eventually things were looking brighter...then a few days pass by. I had said that we should take a few days apart so she can cool off, and I as well This didnt last very long. now she sends me random texts, containing "I miss you" to " I love you" , then the series BS started last night. I had my new interst over, wacthing a movie, and I get a series of texts. Telling me how she is going to go vanish after today, and she is moving far away, just no sure where. THat she cant handle rejection, and that she cant handle all of this and is going to move away. Now 3 years ago she moved to CA, and that put a hell of alot of distance between us, tie that up with a break up and other things, and thus the 3 year silence had started. So today she is giving me a time frame to talk to her before she shuts her phone of, permantly apperntly. My question is how do I handle this? I have known the girl for a better part of 8 years, lil more then that now that I think about. Now I am torn, she is pissing me off with these random texts of desperation, though agian I respect them. I wanted her to be vocal, and to be clear with things, because for so long she was wraped up in her own shell, and wouldnt talk to anyone. And now with all this, she is taking it way out of focus. We havent dated in 3 years, we werent together when I met this girl, and I think I was as honest as I could be. So now I dont know what to do, I have to talk to her today, but this stuff is getting out of control. Link to comment
batteredandlost Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 In all reality, you DON'T have to talk to her today. If it isn't just her wanting what she can't have, she won't go anywhere fast. Do you REALLY want to get back with her? You lived three years without her in your life at all, you met someone else. If she really wants you for you and respects you, she'll understand if you ask her for time to think about what you really want. Link to comment
Lana0120 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 This sounds like the classic 'I don't want you but no one else can have you' scenario and she is manipulating you into doing things on her terms. Stick with your new girl and totally back off from your ex. She's bad news. Link to comment
browneyedgirl36 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 ^^Yes, please, please take these posters' advice. Your ex sounds unstable -- she is just testing to see if you would drop everything and take her back; don't do it. It sounds like you've got someone you really care about in your life. Why risk losing it over someone who can't make up her mind? Let her go. Let her move away to wherever she's going, and be glad you did. Link to comment
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