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Checking up on the ex...


Poe

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I know we all have a tenancy to check our ex's myspace. We drive by their houses, never pass for an opportunity to hear what they are up to. Years ago I had a relationship where I did this, and eventually I made myself so sick that I just totally stopped any manifestation of my curiosities. When I break up now, I never look back, I never check profiles, or myspace pages, or drive past houses, or anything like that. Part of it is I know that I need to move on and looking back won't help. The rest is fear of being hurt the way I was with my ex when I'd check up on her, expecting the worst, and seeing/hearing the worst and getting that knot in my stomach. So now I don't do that - ever.

 

Is that an unhealthy way to deal with breakups? Just cut her off, cold turkey, and never look back? It seems so narcissistic...

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One night... during a severe bout of missing the ex... I actually drove by his house at 2 in the fricking morning. 2 am! Drove by twice! Saw his open window, dark inside, he must be sound asleep!!! His curtain is left wide open, he might catch a cold! Saw his car, parked neatly, I used to ride in the passenger seat...

 

I know... weird. The most bothersome part is... driving back home, I felt strangely happy. Like a weight has been lifted. I had this grin plastered on my face. I scared myself so bad, I vowed never to do it again!!!!

 

So to you, OP. Kudos, much kudos. That is the best way to go about it.

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Is that an unhealthy way to deal with breakups? Just cut her off, cold turkey, and never look back? It seems so narcissistic...

 

IMO I think that is much healthier than doing the checking up, drive by's, etc. So no way - definitely not unhealthy. That's the way I will be after any future breakups now, after having learnt big time what NOT to do from this one.

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I hate how myspace gives people this image to put out there that says "look how much better my life is than yours". Every picture is them doing something that looks like fun while your suffering and wondering if they are even thinking about you. Myspace probably crushes a lot of people everyday including me.

 

I have one that I don't even log into and tell my friends I don't have one. I think it's teeny bopper site. Myspace sucks.

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