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Wow, you have GOT to be kidding me...

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Long story short, details can be found in my previous posts.


Ex goes back to her controlling ex. I flip out one night and tell her never to call me again. She calls me back and I apologize. I then begin No to little contact. Any contact is mostly on her part (she calls every now and then). I see her at work everyday and it just makes the healing process harder.


Now this is unbelievable. She calls me up asking if I have signed up to go to this school I talked to her about a while ago. I said not yet and she tells me that she has decided to go too and wants to take the same classes as myself. She wants to meet over the weekend and talk about it.


I'm thinking to myself that I'm screwed. I wanted to go to this school and was looking forward to seperating myself from her and meeting new people. Now she is going to be hanging around me all the time and I will STILL see her everyday!


What do I do? What the hell does she want from me? I just don't understand! I gave her every reason to never speak to me again, but she still does. Why does she call me, why does she want to see me????? I want to talk and see her so badly, but I am trying my hardest not to and this DOES NOT HELP. Should I go off on her again? I don't want to.


This is horrible.

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Ugh. Your ex is really clueless.

Tell her you can't meet up this weekend and don't let her know what classes you want to take. And if you can get as close as possible to NC as you can. I know you work togehter, so that makes things awkward, but just cut the conversations short and keep it mostly about work. If she asks how you're doing, don't give her a long explanation, just keep it short. The sooner you make her into an acquaintance, the easier it will be to ignore her if she ends up in some of your classes.

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Definitely do not take classes with her. I've been in a relationship where we started a class when we were together and it ended in the middle of the semester. Especially since our seats were solidified with me sitting next to her and being her partner everyday, it made things so hard.


She might have some idea of getting back with you and using this as a way to do it. At the same time though, she is with her ex. So nobody really knows whats going on. I think you actually should meet her this weekend and really get down to why she has the need to go to the same school and take the same classes. You can't really avoid her since you'll see her at work, so might as well go this weekend and get it all out on the table.


Explain to her that it would be too hurtful to see her everyday knowing that she is with someone else. You had decided that you wanted to move on and you'd prefer that you guys don't see or talk to each other.

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She must enjoy toying with your attention.


I'd block calls and emails without any explanation, because she must know how you feel about her but is too self-absorbed to care about your feelings.


She must know how this bugs you, or she's daft.

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Sounds like she still wants to be friends and it all depends on what you want and how you feel about that. If you still love her and want her back, I'd stay as far away from her as possible because to do otherwise you're probably courting disaster all over again.


On the other hand, if you're really over her and can handle being friends with her and hearing about all her exploits with other guys, Then I see nothing wrong with being pals and taking the same class. Just be really, really cautious and brutaly honest with yourself regarding your feelings for her before you do anything or you could very well get hurt all over again... and again... and again...

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Weeblie and Dako you are right on.


I guess all is not paradise with Mr. Control Freak and she needs some attention from you. Do not meet with her, tell her that she has a boyfriend and that you will not get in the way of that so you will not meet her. You can also tell her that you do not wish to be her friend now that she is with another man and that it is up to her whether or not she takes the same courses as you but you have your own life to lead and don't really care to be involved with hers. Then leave it at that. If she is hurt, too bad...self-absorbed people tend to go boo hoo when someone calls them on their actions but have little regard for anybody else's feelings. You shouldn't feel badly about having to hurt her in order to set your healthy boundaries. Self-absorbed people don't recognize anybody else's boundaries but have very strict boundaries of their own....it is your duty to yourself to not let her cross your healthy boundaries...if she doesn't like it, tough s**t.

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