Return my ex's phone call?

[pinkranger]

Hey everyone!

 

My ex broke up with me 2.5 months ago (we only dated ~2 monthsish). I still have feelings for him, but don't want to get back together with him, at least not now, since I'm leaving the country for a few months soon!

 

Since we broke up we met for coffee, and while I got mixed signals, I left being pretty turned off by the idea of getting with him again.

 

Since then I've moved on quite well. I really like being single.

 

I've been thinking about him a little lately, wondering how he is, mostly as a friend. He actually called recently a few days ago. He left a voicemail asking if I'd left yet and how I was doing and wanted to me to call back.

 

I feel obligated to call 1) because I'm nice! and 2) because I'm semi-interested in maintaining some ties...however... the idea of calling him back makes me extremely nervous. I'm worried I might end up being "too nice" to him on the phone if I call back, and will wind up feeling hurt. So I decided not to call. However, this had been hanging over my head for the past few days, and I feel like I should call just to get it over with.

 

Any suggestions... or words of encouragement of why I shouldn't call?

 

Thanks a bunch!

[Cognitive_Canine]

Well, since you seem to be completely healed after the break up, I'd say that returning his reaching out to you seems good and fine to me. I'd make it clear that you just want to be friends right off the bat though.

 

Also, mixed signals usually means that they want to get back together but are unsure of your intentions, so, they keep retreating back to the "I just wanna be friends mode". At least, that seems to be the usual case.

 

Just keep in mind that you want to be friends the entire time you are talking to him and make it clear that that is all you want.