paigehedi Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 i just had sex with somebody that i dont know very well. we used a condom. afterward he said he's had more than 15 partners. should i be worried about std's? or am i just jumping to conclusions. how effective are condoms? i think getting tested would be irrational, but i am a minor and how can i do this without my parents knowing? do free clinics offer this kind of stuff? Link to comment
renaissancewoman101 Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 If you're going to get tested, get tested for everything now and three months later. Some STDs take about three months to show up. And yes, there are free clinics or low cost clinics where you can get tested confidentially. Link to comment
musicguy Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 I think free clinics offer pregnancy and std tests. Link to comment
Mythical_Suicide Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 you should get tested for STD's no matter whether you use a condom or not (There are a few that are transmitted through skin to skin contact and condoms serve no protection against them). Go to your local health dept/planned parenthood and they should offer testing, but I think most places require parental consent when it comes to STD testing if you're of a certain age. Link to comment
jenny_mcs Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 i think getting tested would be irrational, but i am a minor and how can i do this without my parents knowing? do free clinics offer this kind of stuff? Find a Planned Parenthood near you- they will help you out. Link to comment
Kiwi_Sweet Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 Yes, you should be concerned. You don't know this guy/girl sexual history. If I were you, I would tell my parents ASAP. You might think you have to hide this from them, but in all reality, they want to be the first people to know. Trust me, they've probably planned for this day. Plus, they have experience and they can help you figure out what you need to do to keep your self safe next time. I mean, what if this person you slept with was a rapist or something? What if they kidnapped you and you never got to see your parents again? That would be a shame and very sad. You should never run off with a strange person that you don't know. Sex is NOT that big of a deal. Not to go and ruin your life over. You don't want to end up with some disease like HIV sweety, that will never go away. You should take care of your body and want to keep it safe from that kind of stuff. I really hope you learned something from this. You need don't need to be out there having sex with people you don't know. It's not healthy for your body and it's definitely not mentally healthy. I am very concerned for you, and I think you should at least talk to an adult in your family, that way they can steer you in the right direction. I used to always tell my cousins this saying. Pretend you are a piece of chocolate... Now, imagine that chocolate getting passed around from hand to hand to hand... Do you think that chocolate will still be the same consistency after being passed around? No, because after a while, it will melt and get old... Now, imagine that piece of chocolate as yourself... And imagine giving your future husband/wife that chocolate in the future... Do you think it will still be good?? Think about that for a little bit.. Link to comment
alakazam Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 ...Now that you have this innate fear of being a worthless piece of chocolate that'll never be good any more because you had sex (because I know you feel dirty now, like you're not good enough because you had sex with someone you don't know), and, according to the last post, shared that chocolate so now it's old and melted, think about this: Chocolate bars are handled by at least one person before they get to their final destination. They work their hardest and darnedest to pass it to as few people as possible, but, almost inevitably, it gets shared a little bit. If that didn't make sense, what I'm saying is that we all make mistakes. Mistakes don't make us 'tainted goods' or anything like that and make us worthless people since we've done that. It's not trying to not make those mistakes again that makes us bad people and 'tainted goods.' Yes, having sex like that was a big deal and a big mistake, but no, it's not the end of the world. And I agree: talk to your parents. They will be disappointed, angry - and they'll let you know it - but they also realize that they, along with all of their friends and everyone they know, have been in that same situation before... If you don't believe me, just pay attention from another room when your families get together... I heard family talking about how, "We never had sex like that when we were young..." "We didn't?" "Well... ummm..." Anyway - learn from it, don't do it again, and talk to your parents... And try and keep your head up. Link to comment
teknoise Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 Ugh, don't go making this a potentially disastrous situation by telling your parents. Its not the end of the world. Dragging your parents into your sex life is not going to be pretty. If you are mature enough to be having sex, you should be mature enough to deal with whatever aftermath you are given on your own, and without your parents. Go get tested, most std tests shouldn't require parental approval. I dunno about where you live, but here they don't. Try not to worry too much. You used a condom, many (but not all) stds can't be passed when using a condom. Just because someone slept with 15 people doesn't make them dirty and disease ridden. Someone can have 1 or 2 partners and have an std. Link to comment
jenny_mcs Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 I think that is a horrible and unhealthy way to look at sex. Link to comment
Taomagicdragon Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 It's nice in sentiment: to treat yourself with respect and value intimacy. But it falls short in that it assumes all encounters will tarnish the person. That's simply not always the case. Link to comment
Darkness_Falls Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 I don't actually see any problems here whatsoever. There is nothing wrong with having sex with someone you don't know very well or having a lot of sexual partners. There is also no problem with saving yourself for just one person. It's called having an open mind. Something I don't think some people have on here. The fact you had sex with someone you didn't know and you used a condom is no big deal, I don't see why you should need to involve your parents in the matter if you don't want to. Anyways, since you used a condom you should be 99% protected against STDs. For peace of mind you could go to a free clinic and get checked out anyhow. If you didn't use a condom then it would be a different story I think, I think you have very little to worry about. Link to comment
alcide Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 How old are you? Were you force? jUST CONCERN, i think since you used comdoms and it didnt burst u should be safe, did you see any pump or usual stuff on his penis? Are you feeling any burning in you v.... these symptoms can help see if you in trouble. Link to comment
barbielovesmac Posted January 21, 2008 Share Posted January 21, 2008 hmm, i think the topic of how many partners each of you have been with should've come up BEFORE the deed was done, ya think? Link to comment
renaissancewoman101 Posted January 22, 2008 Share Posted January 22, 2008 I think some of the posters on here are being kinda hard on the OP. She regrets sleeping with the person without knowing him really well and she wants to deal with that. She does NOT need some moral lecture either. We all make mistakes some point in our lives. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted January 23, 2008 Share Posted January 23, 2008 7 or 35. no number makes you safe. if you don't feel safe, get tested and find out. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.