Winter loneliness

[definitely_maybe]

It seems to happen every winter. I spend a lot of time thinking about how I am alone, and lack a girlfriend or really close friends. I have been single most of my life; a little background:

 

My experience with girls has been pretty limited. A few dates when i was younger, and a short relationship near the end of my high school days. It definitely lacked intimacy, and I guess was not a very serious relationship. I cared for her, and I think it could have developed more if she would have given it a chance. I may be the slightest bit bitter, but overall, feel that I have gained from my past experiences.

 

When it comes to friendships, I have had a few best friends, but have lost them. In elementary school, I had one best friend, and we spent a lot of time together. When we got to high school, he started hanging out with the wrong crowd, drinking, and doing drugs. We grew apart very quickly. I later got a new best friend the next year, but then he moved far away. Few years later, I started building another friendship, but then came university, which took me away from my home town, and hence, we are not close these days, though we are still on good terms, and see each other occasionally in the summer. Now, at university, my "friends" are more like acquaintances, as we don't hang out outside of school. I find it harder to "connect" with guy friends, and find girls easier to make conversation with.

 

I don't really know what I want though. Yes, sometimes I feel lonely, and everybody likes to feel loved. But, I am not sure if I want the commitment and obligations that come along with a relationship. I think a big part of it is that I feel I don't have an awful lot of free time, due to my busy school schedule. I spend enough time procrastinating, that if i worked on my time management, I could probably make it work, but I would not want my grades to suffer.

 

But, when spring comes, school is over, my stress level drops, and I have time to do the outdoor activities that I love, I spend a lot less time feeling lonely, and am in general happier.

 

I guess this is more me venting than anything else, but if anybody has any advice on how to get through the winter months, feel free to share.

[easyguy]

If you are becoming too stressed out, take a break and resume once you are rested.

 

Do not depend on friends for happiness. That will come from within once you occupy yourself with what it is you enjoy doing that transcends friendships. If you stuggle to engage in something external, practice being with Winter just as it is.

[BillBob]

i can relate i am exactly like you in elementary school i had so many close true friends but in highschool everyone separated and i only had one true friend remain from elementary. Were still friends but its so hard for me to find other true friends and to find people to hang out with.