What is it with me?

[v-neck]

It is hard for me to 'open' up in general let alone post my problem on the internet but here goes.

 

I dated a girl seriously for 5 years broke up for a year and got back together 2 summers ago. Before this last summer began she broke up with me, which now has been 8 months with absolute zero contact on both parts.

I have to add we bought an engagement ring 2 christmas's ago together but never got he chance to give it to her.

 

Here's my problem. I'm slowly accepting we gave it chance after chance and it's over, but I can't stop thinking about her and I seriously can't handle it somedays (even after 8 months). For example, I went to a dressy dinner party last night and while at that party there were beautiful girls and successful guys. All i could think about was how much she wanted me to be a successful guy and be motivated. Needless to say all I could picture in my mind was her ending up with one of these money-hungry power pigs. I guess as she got older her tastes changed. Now let me add, i'm not by any means a rich guy, but I do have a good job, a technical degree in health care, I am a musician on the side as a main hobby, I play hockey as a minor hobby and i'm not that bad looking, I look like a rugged hockey player with some looks

 

Anyways, my point is I feel like im always comparing myself to other guys and comparing other girls to her. I'm literally driving myself so crazy to the point i'm not even myself anymore, and all because of what a girl did to me.

I read posts of people getting divorces and cheating spouses w/kids, ect... and I feel i may not be as bad, but I might as well been married to this girl. What do you do when you love a person who doesn't feel the same? i tried giving it time, space.. should i tell her how I still feel about her, or will her ego get bigger.. I'm very lost here. Thanks for reading

 

`v-neck

[lizer]

do girls get big egos? i think thats more of a masculine trait if i say so myself, but maybe im just not one of those girls. if a man loved me, and expressed it, i wouldnt feel "powerful" i would feel humbled and... loved. if somehow that pumps up their ego, then that isnt really anyone you need to be around. love isnt about ego. its the opposite, in fact.

 

you really need to disect why she broke up with you. why you broke up with her. why the relationship ended TWICE, and THEN decide what to do. i mean really put some girth and sweat into figuring out the failure in the relationship before you attempt to put yourself back into it.

 

with that said. women can be wooed quite easily. its just a matter of of whether shes ready for it. but i really would reach out at least slightly to her after you've SAT DOWN AND THOUGHT IT OUT. 8 months is a decent amount of time, pop her a small bit of contact why dont you and see what happens?

send a card that shows you're thinking of her.. something like that.