backagain Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 lately i feel like im hittin the bottom of this healing curve.....cant wait til it starts to go back up. feeling quite lonely.... i can go out and meet other woman, but i simply dont want to. i can go out and make new friends, but i simply dont want to. tomorrow is a close friends party, and i dun even know if im gonna go. i wonder what shes doing....if she thinks about me....if she misses me... i dun think the answers for those questions are very positive. i guess its 1 of those nights....or 1 of those weeks should i say. my birthday just passed....and it has been the most meaningless birthday i've had.....ever. its getting really tiring puttin on this front, this pretense, this fake smile...i feel like i need a break......from everything, and everyone. i just saw i am legend the movie.....and it just depressed me even more...terrible idea watching it. anywho just rambling on. Link to comment
-BK- Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 backagain, I know it's hard when you are feeling like this... but it's the time you really need to do those things the most. This is when you really need to meet a new friend, meet a new girl, or go to a friend's party. As hard as it seems, sitting at home will not get you out of the hole you feel like you're sinking into. I'm sorry to hear about the birthday. My ex broke up with me the week of my birthday and never even called, e-mailed, or texted. I can relate to a bad birthday... Link to comment
tao_of_me Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 here's the thing about I am Legend....he's the last guy on earth.....he's lost EVERYONE, including his wife and kid, but he still has the determination to go on. Makes ur problems seem kinda small doesn't it, even if it is fiction? Take what you will from the movie, just as you can take what you will from life's twists and turns. You can crumble in the face of adversity or you can find your own strength deep down (isn't that what makes it LEGEND, versus just the last guy around to suffer?)...the choice is yours. Food for thought. Man up. Link to comment
random_stranger Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 Hi backagain, Sorry you're feeling depressed... I know you're a guy, but ever consider crying? It helps! It's your body's way of relieving toxins and you're sure to feel better after. (At least I usually do.) Whenever I get sad about my life, family, friends, ex, I just let my emotions take over and have a really long, good cry. I crank up the music so that nobody hears me, and I have some eyedrops on hand so that I can clear my red eyes, but yea... it helps. =) Either that or go on youtube and find something funny to laugh at. That helps too! Hope you feel better... Link to comment
backagain Posted January 11, 2008 Author Share Posted January 11, 2008 i dunno about the friends party.......im having a little bit of issue trusting people around me lately.....and i am really tired.....emotionally drained from just putting this defense up this whole time while trying to deal with this breakup. b4 anyone asks, i have to keep this defense up for a while to allow myself heal, its my natural defense mechanism since i first knew how to think. besides....for all those who have followed my post....u know i've been stabbed too many times in this past 2 months alone by "mutual friends". instead, i think im just gonna go out with my cousin....family after all...is family.....i dun need to defend myself from anything....at least for 1 night....before the night after where im getting together with friends again for the 2nd round birthday celebration..... i just need a break...from everything. Link to comment
poohkins Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 I know how you feel. I want to quit my job and just head to the mountains for some "alone" time. I also am feeling really vulnerable around people, and not comfortable hanging out with too many people, at present. It will get better, I'm sure, but that's just the way it is right now. I'm taking things one day at a time, and, yes, crying DOES help. Over the last week, I have cried so many tears I thought they'd never stop. Today, they stopped. They may come back, but I truly believe that if you let yourself experience the depths of your grief, you know you can survive. And, even thought it may seem that you will feel like this forever, that is not true! There is a saying that "whatever the depths of your grief, so also will be the heights of your joy." Right now, that's just a hope ... I'd settle for a plateau at the moment ... but it is something for me to look forward to. None of us knows what tomorrow will bring. Good luck, buddy. Link to comment
Lugh Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 Back again, you can only keep your shield up for so long, its ok to let go every so often and let your feelings out,its good to vent, to have some emotion time, i foung writing very helpful, i wrote a letter to my ex (never to be posted) and just let the feelings flow, it was very helpful and suprising and scary at times what came out. i also found a punch bag a great release , good exercise and a great vent. you will get there but you have to make the effort. Link to comment
robert7x Posted January 11, 2008 Share Posted January 11, 2008 backagain - I feel like you today for some reason... I was fine for a little while but then today it just hit me since i woke up... Maybe it has to do because i dreamt about her again and in dreams everything was nice and normal like before... then i woke up and reality hit me... Stay in there bud, we'll ge thru this crap... We're humans, we can adapt to things and learn from the past so in the future we'll be better prepared. I'm like you, i don't feel like doing anything, i just want to sit and think... but WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING!... Anything, but sit and think... Stay Strong bud. Link to comment
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