kezmcc Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 I'm sure you guys get a lot of this, i stumbled apon this after looking for some help through a search engine. And I apologise if it seems like I'm just ramblng on. Okay heres my problem, latley I've been feeling extremly lonley and maybe even a bit depressed. My reasons for this are simple, i never see any of my friends anymore, people that I used to be close to a couple of months ago, never seem to want to get in touch. For example, my closest childhood friend, lets call him P, is at the same university as me, doing a different course, and he has met loads of new friends. I bumped into him while shopping with my boyfriend at the weekend and he started arranging to go outwith me. So finally I thought things were looking up! However I turned up on tuesday waited an hour and he didnt turn up, ignorned my calls so i decided to give up and go home. Just feels like noone cares about me. I have no other reason to feel the way I do, I have a great family, boyfriend, worklife. I just find it really hard to make friends at university ( where apparently its easy). I have people i speak to in work but I wouldnt exactly call them friends. I've ended up having no-one but my boyfriend, Thats not a good thing, because when he's not here (he lives 60 miles away) I feel I truly have no-one. To make it simple, if I woke up one morning and decided I wanted to go shopping, but I didn't want to go alone. I'd have no-one to call. The world is a lonley place I know, I just need some tips on how to not end up in the trap of having one (ultimatily "best" ) friend. I don't know what to do. Link to comment
samantha20 Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 I know exactly how you feel. What year of university are you in? I'm now in my 3rd year. In my first year I was very lonely, I got put in accommodation with just 2 other girls. I tend to get on better with guys anyway, and these girls were really clicky because they did the same course, and they completely left me out. Eventually I became really good friends with my manager at the club I work in and we ended up in a relationship. For the next 2 and a half years she was my best friend and I spent all my time with her. She dumped me new year's eve and is already going out with someone else. I don't feel like I can stay friends with her now as it is too painful that she is with someone else, and I'm left with no one. Because I spent all my time with her I didn't make any other friends. Just want you to know that I know what you're going through. If you are in your first year, then I'm pretty sure things will get better for you. The first year's always the hardest as friendships take a long time to develop. Link to comment
kezmcc Posted January 10, 2008 Author Share Posted January 10, 2008 Sorry forgot to mention that lol yes I'm in first year. seems like everyones in groups already though! Im sorry for your situation, sounds really tough. Hopefully things will get better, for both of us Link to comment
dan39 Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 I thought I was reading a post by myself for a second there! I have similar problems. I don't have hardly any friends at uni and my 'growing up' friends are different to me now. I think getting involved with a sport or club is a good idea. Are you into anything like that? I'm not although I wouldn't mind getting interested in something I just don't know what! Anyway good luck with it, it sucks to be lonely as I've found out lately. Link to comment
kezmcc Posted January 10, 2008 Author Share Posted January 10, 2008 That would be an awesome idea... however I don't have time... Im at uni full time, and work 20 hours per week. Weekends are usually spent visiting the bf lol and all other free time is spent completing coursework :S ahhhh! Link to comment
dan39 Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 Wow 20 hours and uni. What do you do workwise? Can't you get out more student loan? Link to comment
kezmcc Posted January 10, 2008 Author Share Posted January 10, 2008 I work in a well know diy store its not very demanding work but none the less... Ive got a student loan at the moment, and I think it maybe the maximum? Link to comment
dan39 Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 Yea it's not about being demanding though, more the fact it takes your time. I think 20 hours a week is quite a chunk of your time... I'd consider cutting that down if at all possible. Link to comment
samantha20 Posted January 10, 2008 Share Posted January 10, 2008 Maybe you could get a different job? I've worked in a very busy night club since I started uni. It's a good place to work when you're a student, because the majority of the customers are also students and will begin to recognise you if they drink there a lot. You will find random people chatting to you and it's a really good way to make friends. Link to comment
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