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rjr0815

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How in the world can you have so much in common with someone but when you kiss - nothing!

 

Because we were so into each other we tried to date but the spark never came. On the phone and in text messages I was very happy but around her I was nervous - I think because it seemed she was the one - so could the nervousness turned her off, thereby no spark for each of us?

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How in the world can you have so much in common with someone but when you kiss - nothing!

 

Because we were so into each other we tried to date but the spark never came. On the phone and in text messages I was very happy but around her I was nervous - I think because it seemed she was the one - so could the nervousness turned her off, thereby no spark for each of us?

 

There's the problem. Never EVER start dating someone with that assumption in mind, no matter how great they are. It will put unnecessary pressure on you to be "On" all the time, and you will work yourself into a state of nervousness. The other person will sense that and will react accordingly - also nervous/uneasy. She's just another girl, and there will be plenty of others who are just as great as her.

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I have to change the line a little, I didn't think she was the one in the beginning. However in the beginning I was told repeatedly how she got hurt before, men going way to fast, etc. So I think I was nervous and reserved because I wanted to not be THAT guy.

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I have to change the line a little, I didn't think she was the one in the beginning. However in the beginning I was told repeatedly how she got hurt before, men going way to fast, etc. So I think I was nervous and reserved because I wanted to not be THAT guy.

 

Ahh, so the onus is on her then. She set these expectations for you to live up to so it's no wonder you got nervous. I've learned that talking about past relationships too early (or at all) really isn't helpful. It's not surprising it didn't work out since she's still carrying baggage from previous relationships into a new one with you.

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She brought up things I really didn't need to hear as well. EX: after we initially met she went on a date with someone else and proceeded to tell me about their kissing (quote: when you go on a date at least shave because my face was scratched) and how she didn't want to see him again. She felt like I was a friend which is why she told me. Didn't really bother me because we had just met and he was out of the picture after words but probably something not to tell someone you just met and have an interest in.

 

All of this added to the nervousness.

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I tried not to look at it in any way but it was tasteless. She always said she did it because she felt so comfortable with me that it didn't occur to her what she was saying. After she told her friend what she said she sent me a text apologizing. She also said I felt like a friend to her and it was nice I didn't judge her for it. I think this had a alot to do with the no sparks. Someone told me I resented her because of it so I did not like her - thereforeeee no sparks.

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