justagirl Posted November 12, 2003 Share Posted November 12, 2003 You shouldn't have to worry about looking weak in her eyes. It shouldn't matter what she thinks. It takes a whole lot to tell someone whats on your mind, so you should be respected by her for expressing whats going on in your head. So no worries about how you look in her eyes. *~Justagirl~* Quote Link to comment
The Morrigan Posted November 12, 2003 Share Posted November 12, 2003 As far as getting on with your life and not moping where it can be "reported" to her - yes, act like you're doing great. You can punch a wall and scream and cry in private However, it's not weak at all to lay down some boundaries of your own, and make sure they're respected. Believe me, NOBODY who's been on the receiving end of being left is honestly thrilled to hear their ex is burning up the town with another, male OR female - and it's not something you have to put up with. If she wants to give herself a boost, she can go brag to her girlfriends, not to you. I don't believe anyone who has broken up with their gf/bf can HONESTLY think they want to hear about the new guy or girl in their life - the impression you're gonna end up giving is you'll tolerate hearing about this dude to talk with her, not that you don't care about it. Laying down the law so to speak on this will get you some respect, not appear weak. Basically you're telling her "you hurt me when you left me, I'm moving on, and I'm not going to let you hinder me in that by being thoughtless" Quote Link to comment
bubbamackdaddy69 Posted November 12, 2003 Author Share Posted November 12, 2003 thanks again justagirl.... you're helping me alot through this whole fiasco.. I've never taken a break up as hard as this one. Maybe because it was the longest and I lived with her and the fact that she would tell me countless times how much she wanted to marry me and be the mother of my children. It just tougher when you know that you could have done more earlier in the relationship rather than regretting it afterwards. By this I mean not loving her as much as she loved me during the relationship. I did love but never showed it as much as her. Quote Link to comment
bubbamackdaddy69 Posted November 12, 2003 Author Share Posted November 12, 2003 I totally agree with you MORRIGAN.. Thanks alot... If will say that to her next time she speaks of him Quote Link to comment
justagirl Posted November 12, 2003 Share Posted November 12, 2003 I'm glad to be of help. You most likely took this so hard because of as you said, you 2 were living together, and she mentioned marriage and things often. I'm sure she knew you loved her. Just remember, you cant change the past, use what you know now to learn from and make sure you do things differently next time. But also remember, its not your fault entirely that SHE broke up with YOU. ~*Justagirl*~ Quote Link to comment
bubbamackdaddy69 Posted November 12, 2003 Author Share Posted November 12, 2003 True it is not all my fault. She wasn't the easiest person to get along with but I have to admit that she gave more to the relationship at the time than I did. thanks Quote Link to comment
stiker24 Posted November 12, 2003 Share Posted November 12, 2003 This advice helped me when i was going through a situation like yours. Women are like monkeys. They don't let go of one branch till they grab on to another. I know it hurts bro, but let her go. You're the same guy you were before you met her. You'll find someone way better. Just give it some time. Quote Link to comment
bubbamackdaddy69 Posted November 12, 2003 Author Share Posted November 12, 2003 LOL... I like your comment with the Monkey... Thanks.. After thinking about it , it does make sense with women, well actually my ex anyways. I'm sure they are not all like that Quote Link to comment
justagirl Posted November 12, 2003 Share Posted November 12, 2003 LoL! Well I am one woman who is definitely not a monkey. but that is such a cute saying...and I do agree with it. More than half of the woman out there are like monkeys. ...ahh that was cute... ~*Justagirl*~ Quote Link to comment
bubbamackdaddy69 Posted November 12, 2003 Author Share Posted November 12, 2003 Just thought of something... I have a dentist apointment next Wednesday at the office the ex works at?She is the Denatl Assistant there..should I reschedule for a day she doesn't work? Quote Link to comment
The Morrigan Posted November 12, 2003 Share Posted November 12, 2003 Yikes - lol, is there any more complications you can throw in for fun? Just kidding... Honestly, it depends on your feelings on it, if you're going to feel uncomfortable enough where it's going to kill your day - reschedule. Keep in mind who's the most important person to look out for - you, and go with how it's going to make you feel. Quote Link to comment
bubbamackdaddy69 Posted November 12, 2003 Author Share Posted November 12, 2003 Yeah screw it..I'm still gonna go. I have to get my teeth cleaned you know.. I'll just walk in there with a big smile Quote Link to comment
caliboy Posted November 12, 2003 Share Posted November 12, 2003 ya go to the dental appt and just be nonchalant about everything. don't show any feelings and treat her like she's just a friend or even an acquaintance. the whole time you're there, just think to yourself what she's done to you, talking about her new boyfriend, etc. but only if you think you can do this. if you can't (cause seeing someone can be tougher then just talking over the phone with them), then don't go, cause it'll set you back more. about that letter you wrote, sit on it for a week or two and then see how you feel about it. re-read it then and i'm sure there're going to be things in it you'll want to change or take out cause you'll be stronger. i just got from the letter that you're spilling your emotions for her and that's something you don't want to do. Quote Link to comment
bubbamackdaddy69 Posted November 12, 2003 Author Share Posted November 12, 2003 Tanks caliboy... I appreviate your comments.. I will go to the appt.. and be cool about.. And about the letter I will wait on it for a couple of weeks... Thanks Quote Link to comment
The Morrigan Posted November 12, 2003 Share Posted November 12, 2003 Damn, boy, you've got guts! Hey, more power to you, you've also got an invisible cheering section on this board. \ And I agree with caliboy - wait on the letter, hell, write more if they come to mind, if you knew the sheer volume I've written and never sent... lol, sometimes it's just good to write it and get it all down as it comes to you, even if you don't send it in the long run, it lets you take that step back and see how you felt when you wrote those words, and how you feel in comparison. Especially when you don't think you're making progress, it can help to see little differences there, so keep it up, you've definitely got the right attitude going for you! Quote Link to comment
bubbamackdaddy69 Posted November 12, 2003 Author Share Posted November 12, 2003 Hey thanks TheMorrigan... I appreciate your comments as well.. Yeah I see her next wednesday at the dentist.. It's gonna be weird having her assist the dentis while she works on me..Oh well.. I'll keep smiling.. I should seriously think about changing dentists though. I mean it's way at the other end of town.I only went there because of the ex. But maybe I shouldn't because actually the Dentist that my ex girlfriends assists is a woman and she's HOT !! A HOT Dentist !!.. LOL I'll do my best I guess Quote Link to comment
bdub Posted November 13, 2003 Share Posted November 13, 2003 Sounds to me like you enjoy pain with beautiful women.....lol, j/k. Just to have the guts to date a dentist or an assistant. They really know how to dish out the pain...... Good luck and Best Wishes, bdub Quote Link to comment
bubbamackdaddy69 Posted November 13, 2003 Author Share Posted November 13, 2003 Thanks bdub... Yeah I like the pain I guess... They ex must not be too happy though for paying for her cleanings at work she now has to pay 50%. She used to be on my Dental coverage at work because I work for the Government and we were considered commom-law and everything was covered 100%. Oh well.. Yeah you should see the Dentist she works for..WOW.. She's my age and beautiful.. My ex was younger than me. She's 23 turning 24 in 2 weeks and I'm 27.. Maybe I should try to hook up with the dentist...lol... Yeah right !She's going out with a geeky doctor Quote Link to comment
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