Advice: What to Do? She brings people along.

[doomed_one]

I need some advice. Last semester I meta girl(let's call her Sarah). I have not been interested in anyone (oddly enough), for 2 years... and when I met her through a friend I found her absolutely amazing. I'm a bit shy, and so asking her directly out wasn't really happening... whenever a larger group of us got together I got to see her then... but besides that all i really had was facebook.

 

When new years came along, the friend that introduced us (call him John), suggested that I take her as my date for new years (as a couple of us were going to go chill and then club). I took a swing at it, and she was down with it... which I thought was cool. I didn't have huge expectations, but maybe just for her to get to know her and such.New years was a bit of a disappointment, as for some reasn her older sister came along. She seemed to eternally hover around her, I sorta of wondered why the sister wouldn't just "disappear" for even 15 min so I could get a few dances and just some 1-on-1 time.

 

The experience wasn't a total loss, as I got her #, and msn... and we now chat and/or text/call. Plus she seemed to have warmed up a bit to me.

 

During one of our conversations, I found out she loved movies... and I right on the spot I figured I had a golden chance. I told her I was dying to see Juno, who happens to have an actress that she likes... but I couldn't find the show times(I really couldn't limited release!). She happened to dig them out, and I asked if she'd like to come see it with me the next day. She declined stating that she was busy, but asked if it was possible we could see it a a little later... I agreed... and told her to let me know when she was free....but was a bit skeptical. I decided to keep quiet about the movie and see if she would bring it up... or if this was just a way to get out of the movie.

 

Lo and behold, she did! Posting on my FB that we needed to go see Juno... I took this as a great sign, I'd get that 1-on-1 time chance I wanted NYE

 

We talked today... and after some debate it landed on Tuesday after my classes.... and then.... she asked if John wanted to come see it too... this was like getting hit in the dark... I saw he wasn't on msn... and told her, well maybe but he's not on... but she promptly decided to call him... and now he is coming...

 

Tell me, am I doing something wrong? First of NYE's her sister was hovering around, now for this our mutual friend will be there for the movie. All I really wanted was to have a chance for me to do something, anything, where I'm the only other person there... and I find this disheartening. It's been two years, but last time I was at this, I could ask a girl to go skating, a movie, or come help me at the mall shop, and I don't think they'd ever bring anyone along.

 

Truthfully at the moment I have somewhat lost interest in the whole movie outing idea. With my friend there, this will be no different then any other time... and I have the urge to feign sick on Monday evening to avoid it. I know its possible she may not be interested in me that way, but I would have preferred an outright no over "bring friend along".

 

Help?

[winchester3]

If John is a friend, ask him about Sarah. If you feel comfortable tell John that you like her and ask him to cancel on you guys (a real friend wont co*k block you). Or maybe she still just wants to get to know you. Only solution to that i see to this is communication.

[AnotherBrokenDoll]

Well as winchester3 said maybe she wants to get to know you a little better first.

 

Theres also the fact that she may be completely shy too and not feel comfortable with just the two of you going. Girls have funny ways of showing emotions haha.

 

Or there is the third possibility that perhaps she just sees you as a friend.

 

Maybe you should tell her that you like her. Let her make up her own mind on what to say, girls can also be clueless.

 

Either way good luck

[Yates33]

You know, alot of things are possible, like always. However, from what you have given us, my opinion is that she is definetely not interested. Maybe her sister "hovering" around her, was a set up so she wouldn't have to be with you alone...maybe not, who knows. However, when you invite her out and she decides to ASK ABOUT and go out of her way TO INVITE another guy...bro, the signs are clear, not interested...only as a friend.

 

I would say stop being such a friend. What do you guys talk about? Turn on the charm and ask her out, you waited too long.

[Russ]

I'd personally not worry about this. Me and my girlfriend are currently trying to get two of our mutual friends who've got a thing for each other together, and we simply go on dates with them for now because they're not comfortable in going out by themselves.

 

She could be uncomfortable. Now, it doesn't mean you're wrong, it just means that she's afraid of making a fool of herself, running out of things to say, etc. That's a good thing, since she cares what you think of her.

 

Think of it this way. She could've blown you off, but she made a plan instead. Even if she's got friendship intentions, friendships frequently grow into further relationships. I was friends with my girlfriend for a year before I even bothered to ask her out.

[doomed_one]

Hello all,

 

Thank you for the replies, it has given me something to think about.Alas, I will side with Yates33 on this one... as today some interesting news surfaced(and that was kinna floating in the back of my head anyhow).

 

There is a guy we know, lets call him Tim. Today my friend, his girl, her, and I met up at school... and there was avid talk about this Tim. I tried to get a little bit of a low-down on what was happening, but due to another friend running into us... the conversation kinna got split up, all I got was something about relationship, something this past weekend weekend... either way, I know there has been something sort of link between the two, just never knew what. Whatever happened, it was dramatic or such.

 

And so actually, now that I think about it, it sorta makes a bit more sense now... I'm going to try to get more info about what exactly... but another guy in the picture would definitely make this puzzle work

 

I'll just enjoy the movie tomorrow, and see if I can get out any more details to get the full picture of what is going on. I'm sure the gossip mill will be in full swing around our group. But it seems I was always the friend right from day 1, and never really stood a chance to begin with

 

Thanks