lotasoup Posted January 5, 2008 Share Posted January 5, 2008 I was in the car with my mom and we got into a fight and then i told her to "shut up" and she called me a monster and that she dreads having to pick me up from my dad's house (divorce) and that she honestly hates being around me. what should i do? I feel so hated. I know saying shut up was a bad thing but I was so mad at her...so.. do i do? Link to comment
m12988 Posted January 5, 2008 Share Posted January 5, 2008 I'm sorry you feel that way. Take a look at the fights, try to see the source of these fights. I'm not sure what kind of advice to give you as i'm not in your situation, but if she makes it known she hates picking you up, then go back to your dad's if it feels more comfortable for you. If you don't, then maybe, like i said, try to find the source of these fights and try not to fight anymore. Try to get along, if you are causing these fights, then stop. Try to talk out disagreements instead of fighting. Link to comment
krazykikikat Posted January 5, 2008 Share Posted January 5, 2008 That's a truly terrible thing for her to have said... Parents just shouldn't say that kind of thing, and if she means it then she shouldn't even be your parent. But I doubt she means it... she was probably just riled up from the argument. Did the marriage end really badly? She could also be angry with your father and taking it out on you... Link to comment
pinkelephant Posted January 5, 2008 Share Posted January 5, 2008 my mom does that alot. she'll tell me she doesn't want to have anything to do with me, tell me to move out, wish i were dead etc... it's pretty abusive, if i say so myself but anyway - usually your mother is nice right? mine is 50/50 lol so i just sort of ignore the bad and don't talk to her when she's cranky. Link to comment
Empathy Posted January 5, 2008 Share Posted January 5, 2008 Having lived a life with parents like this I would suggest you tell her you intend to stay with your dad...permanently if that's possible. If its not then I don't know what to tell you. I didn't even know what to do with my own crappy parents. Link to comment
Lana0120 Posted January 5, 2008 Share Posted January 5, 2008 It may have been that she was angry and said things in the heat of the moment that she may regret now. If her behaviour around you otherwise seems fine, that is very likely. If not, then try and get out of being with your mother. Link to comment
Stu147 Posted January 5, 2008 Share Posted January 5, 2008 I was in the car with my mom and we got into a fight and then i told her to "shut up" and she called me a monster and that she dreads having to pick me up from my dad's house (divorce) and that she honestly hates being around me. what should i do? I feel so hated. I know saying shut up was a bad thing but I was so mad at her...so.. do i do? As others have said, I think you have to look at the bigger picture. How is your mum's behaviour the majority of the time? And secondly, how has you own behaviour been? Have you possibly been difficult to live with? Have you been angry a lot? Do you give your mum a hard time a lot? There can be many reasons why you may do these things, you may be suffering a great deal yourself, but sometimes when we're suffering we don't realise how much those around us are suffering with us or for us. When I was a teenager I was going through a whole word of problems and I was absolute hell to live with. I put my mum through so much heartache, I was simply terrible. We both said things in the heat of the moment, and I can't imagine that she enjoyed having me around at times. But she never stopped loving me. If your mum is usually there for you, supportive of you, and you feel that she does love you, then most likely things have just been said in the heat of the moment. Any relationship, even parent and child, requires two-way communication and two-way effort. You have to help her to help you sometimes, and the same applies for her. Try talking to your mum, at a time when there is an air of peace, and see if you can't work some things out together. If you both explain how you are feeling, and why you react as you do, then it may help reassure you in future. I'm not saying it will stop you arguing, but at least you might feel less hated afterwards. I wish you all the best... Link to comment
mrstubehead Posted January 5, 2008 Share Posted January 5, 2008 My mum told me she hates me and doesnt want to live with me anymore because im so unbareable n stuff, it really hurt and i will never forget it but she doesnt mean it, we all say things we dont mean when we get mad. My mum has made is perfectly clear about her hatred towards me but shows how much she loves me at times too, i think we just focus in on the bad things... Link to comment
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