confused_guy84 Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Ok, one of my major fears with approaching women is being thought of as "creepy". I'm pretty shy with new people and I can sometimes have problems keeping the conversation going but I think I'm a pretty nice guy in general. Yet I have this persistent fear of being labeled as a weirdo because I'm not mr super outgoing. I often hear women say that they don't mind being approached as long as the guy isn't "creepy". So what does that mean to you? Link to comment
stranded247 Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 to me creepy is a guy who seems lecherous and makes it obvious he wants to sleep with you in a crude way. He may be overly aggressive, or too forward like touching you before your even on aquaintance terms. Making sexist jokes, looking at you like your jailbate and being seedy. Link to comment
Lily04 Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 creepy for me meaning i can tell within minutes he wants to get in my pants. sometimes, men will just come up to me and put their hands on my legs or try to get to "inappropriate" places too quickly without the girl's consent and that is creepy...i've had that happen before. where a guy will be fingering my bra strap at a club or something... know your space!! And boundaries.... Otherwise, a man who politely starts up a conversation, maybe with a compliment, like "you look gorgeous tonight... can I buy you a drink?" or something like that, is fine and not creepy. Men who act sleazy and who do not show respect for women are creepy to me... otherwise I sometimes actually get upset for guys not coming up and being more friendly and starting convos!! I'll see them eyeing me from afar but they seem nervous or shy or something, so sometimes *I* will go up and do it myself... but it is nice for a guy to show that type of confidence and please do not mistake it for being creepy! Confidence is hot, sleazy is not! Link to comment
Lionel Hutz Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 This is s grey area for me too. I'm no drooling pervert, but sometimes I fear girls might say I'm creepy too. My female friends reassure me im not but still. What is the definition of a "Creep?" Link to comment
Lily04 Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 This is s grey area for me too. I'm no drooling pervert, but sometimes I fear girls might say I'm creepy too. My female friends reassure me im not but still. What is the definition of a "Creep?" see above, it's not that hard. I think shy guys overthink this, to be honest, and may even use it as an excuse for not having "game" or hitting on women. Link to comment
Lionel Hutz Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Interesting ladies good to know im not a "Creep" Link to comment
greensleeves Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 I can't stand the lounge lizard type who uses preplanned pickup lines and thinks they are God's gift to women. YUCK! For me, if a guy is sincere and let's his real personality show through, they are not creepy. Link to comment
Dating Coach Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Ok, one of my major fears with approaching women is being thought of as "creepy". I'm pretty shy with new people and I can sometimes have problems keeping the conversation going but I think I'm a pretty nice guy in general. Yet I have this persistent fear of being labeled as a weirdo because I'm not mr super outgoing. I often hear women say that they don't mind being approached as long as the guy isn't "creepy". So what does that mean to you? You're probably not a creepy guy. So don't worry about it. Just relax, say what you want to say, do what you want to do. Don't revolve how you act in hopes that they will be more likely to accept you. This causes you to not be you That will work against you more than for you. Link to comment
hmdreamer7 Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 I think a creepy guy is someone you aren't attracted to, yet is checking you out or giving you a lot of attention. If he was attractive to me then I wouldn't be creeped out, I'd be flattered and flirt back! So I guess it depends on who you find attractive. Also if a guy looks at you like a piece of meat, he looks at your body instead of you eyes, that would be creepy. Link to comment
Aleadragonhawk Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Too sexual, too pushy, bad grooming - these can all add to the "creepy" feeling, but I also think that there's something undefinable and instinctual that we call "creepy". Link to comment
HappyAsALark Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 stalkerish, comes up to me to talk but then has nothing to say and just stares at me..stuff like that Link to comment
doyathink Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Creepy? Creepy is when you just walk up to a lady and lick her cheek! Now thats creepy, don't do that. Link to comment
jettison Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Creepy? Creepy is when you just walk up to a lady and lick her cheek! Now thats creepy, don't do that. Dernit! There goes my first move with you. Isn't it strange how women are rarely ever considered "creepy". It almost never happens, but there are some creepy women out there. Women get "crazy" while men get "creepy". I think that every guy who is creepy should be rejoicing around halloweeen time because it's the one plus day for them all year. I remember I knew a friend of a friend. He was dressed in women's jeans, an ill-fitting baseball cap, and a button down shirt that appeared to have some ruffles on the collar. He also had what amounted to a bowl cut. All night long he was going up to women and saying the exact same thing... "I just want you to know that I've been staring at you all night, and I have to say, you're the hottest chick at the party." He said it with that creepy vibe and it was a huuuuuge hit. Most of the women laughed and patted him on the back. The thing that none of these women realized was that he was not actually wearing a constume, and he would have done this on just about any other night of the year. So for that reason, I was endlessly entertained by him, the Creepy Creeperson. Link to comment
doyathink Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 ^ what do you mean ...you already did, thats why I find it creepy! lol Link to comment
greensleeves Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 stalkerish, comes up to me to talk but then has nothing to say and just stares at me..stuff like that Ugh....yes, that's also very creepy. Link to comment
CarnelianButterfly Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 I don't like guys that stare. If you're interested, come say "hi", the longer guy stares, the more I want him to go away. Its a good way for a guy to hobble himself before he even gets over to talk. I don't like guys that I just met touching me. Its too personal. Saying hi is not permission to have your hand on my leg. Little touches, that's fine, a lot of little touches and its too much. Guys that ask too many questions about where I live and want to know way too many details about me when we've just met. Doesn't make eye contact. Link to comment
Veroni Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Dont be a close talker. Dont stare at cleavage. Dont try to hard. Dont stand around if the girl is giving you the no signal. All of these things are creepy. OH and a little word of advice from a bartender.... Dont buy a girl drinks all night if she seems not into you, because girls will use the "creepy" guy to get drunk. Link to comment
CarnelianButterfly Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 I don't accept drinks from guys. My friends maybe, but random guy no way! Link to comment
tiredofvampires Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Guys that talk too much about how hot I look, and appraise me up and down, I find creepy. To me, it's already IMPLIED that you find me attractive if you wish to come over and strike up a conversation. You don't need to tell me again and again how I look. If you're going to do that, you might as well paint in neon yellow (so it lights up in the dim club), "I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU AFTER WE LEAVE HERE" on your forehead. I totally agree about the staring and lack of conversation. Nothing creepier than a guy that just stares (not glancing, STARING) and worse yet, follows you around. Every time you look around, there he is again -- maintaining proximity, but not really making a go of it. Some guys seem to think that the longer they stand there, the more magnetic your body will become to theirs. Wrong. Link to comment
tmp0620 Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Hmmmm interesting post. I definitely don't STARE, I glance a bit, and I don't currently have to confidence to approach people. That would come off more as shy (or even non interest?) rather than creepy right? I don't approach girls cause I just know I'd be the guy that tries to start a conversation and just ends up standing there saying nothing or asking too many random personal questions like CB said is creepy. I just don't know what the heck else to talk about though. Link to comment
JadedStar Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Too sexual, too pushy, bad grooming - these can all add to the "creepy" feeling, but I also think that there's something undefinable and instinctual that we call "creepy". And there you have it...this pretty much sums it up. Don't make overt sexual comments, be well groomed and just talk politely with small talk. Like she also said sometimes there is something undefinable that seems "creepy" but i am sure you don't fall into that group. Worst case scenario one woman out of ten thinks you are creepy. Such is life....her loss. We truly CANNOT please all of the people all of the time. Just be yourself most importantly so that you know if she really likes you for you or not. Don't message random women out of the blue whom you don't know on the internet (unless you are on a dating site). that can be creepy. Link to comment
tiredofvampires Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 So -- not to hijack the thread, but this might be a good case study for you guys to give feedback about: I was at a club a few weeks ago, and a really nice-looking guy (clean cut, well-groomed, very sweet and happy-go-lucky smile) said hi, and then started to chat me up. We stood next to eachother throughout most of the evening, yelling into eachother's ears about the act (it was a concert). He sounded down to earth, but sometimes when a really great song started, I'd look over at him, and he'd wink at me. So there was the winking, and also, a few times when I leaned over to hear what he was saying, or the crowd pushed a little too hard, he put his arm around my back (waist) lightly. He had a nice demeanor that wasn't sleazy, but these winks and the arm thing normally would get a thumbs down from me. I don't know whether to think it was presumptuous, over-eager, or gentlemanly. What do all you ladies think of this? Was that too much pesonal space invasion? Too touch-feely? Would that have been "creepy" for you? Link to comment
Lionel Hutz Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Dont stare at cleavage I am sorry but sometimes with the tops women wear it is Friggin impossible. Especially in Southern California @ Venice beach During summer. Link to comment
JadedStar Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 TOV in that type of loud situation i honestly think that was okay. The environment almost dictated this type of behavior - if not he wouldn't be able to talk to you at all. Link to comment
JadedStar Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 Dont stare at cleavage I am sorry but sometimes with the tops women wear it is Friggin impossible. Especially in Southern California @ Venice beach During summer. LMAO> you are right man. Sometimes women wear things that are so out there....and if no one looks at all she gets ticked off later. Sometimes you guys are right - YOU CANNOT WIN! lol Sorry i know this isn't helping. Link to comment
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