Jump to content

need opinions!!! new member


Recommended Posts

howdy people. im new to this board so this is my very first thread. i wanted to get some opinions from people about my situation. its kinda long but here we go:



-- met this girl in class almost four years ago right? started hanging out here and there but then it just faded. about a year or so goes by and i decided contacting her (summer 05). started talking again but it was inconsistent. well finally one day she contacted me and wanted to go out for a beer and shoot some pool. met up had a good time catching up yada yada. time goes by and we continue to hang out more.


now here is when it gets sticky. we hung out for st patty's day (march 06) along with other friends. all of us decided to come back to my house to shoot some pool. on the way to my house she gets a call and it turns out to be my cousin. hes from the side of the family we dont talk for good reasons. never really considered this guy as my cousin. so anyways as much as i didn't like it, i allowed him to come over. moving fast forward a little bit... they didn't work out because he pretty much chose his job over her because he worked so much. keep in mind her and i are still friends and communicating. well anyways we start hanging out more often, maybe 4 or 5 days a week. then it got to where we were making out. she threw dating at me a couple times but i wasn't on the same page because i had it rough with another girl and didn't want to go through all that so soon again. so our friendship grows closes and i could still tell she wanted more than friends.


well fast forwarding again, in summer 06 and she gets a job offer about 4 hours away. didn't want her to leave but she has to do whats best for herself. she ended up taking the job. i quickly began missing her and realized how much she meant to me. i guess it was like a wake up call. so we kept in contact.


i decided to open up to her on thanksgiving 06 and told her i was interest in dating. she agreed and said we'll go the way we're going until i move back here. couple nights later we got into a discussion and towards the ended she asked if we could date other people until she gets back and i told her i wasn't interest in anyone else. i asked her if she had someone on mind and she said no but hesitated. this began a sparking point. from then on i noticed things were different. every night we would talk on the phone and around the same time she was quick to get off the phone. you know how you can tell if someone is getting a beep on the other persons side, well thats what was happening. or if i would try calling her around that time, she wouldn't click over for me. so anyways i had a gut feeling she was talking to my cousin again. i decided not to contact her for a few days. she would contact me and eventually became aggravated that i didn't respond (this part was around christmas 06). finally i decided to contact her after about 3 days. she ignored me at first and then gave in after a day or 2. i told her why i did it and my thoughts. after going through hell with her i finally got her to admit she was talking to him again. i peaced out. january 07 rolls around and she tries contacting me on my bday at 12:30 am. i was like hhmm wonder why shes still up, must have gotten off the phone with my cousin. i didn't respond. she contacts me again in about 2 weeks and wants to meet up. we talked (she even started kissing me), but things didn't go anywhere. i told her she doesn't know what shes getting herself into. hes still working a lot plus he decided to convert to islam . i told her theres no way its going to work between you two. all she would say if that i have to find out for myself. so we stopped talking, she actually called it. found out they got engaged. easter rolls around and i get a message from her saying that she was just thinking about me and wanted to wish me a happy easter. i didn't respond. then may comes around and i get a text saying you were right i should have listened to you. i didn't respond until 6 hours later. i was like what are you talking about? she mentioned my cousin and she was like he changed. i toyed around with her acting like i didn't care. she blew me up for a couple of days and really wanted to hang out. i decided to see what it would be like because she found how my cousin was for herself and got burned.


we start talking and getting close. but at the same time she would tell me about other guys checking her out, and hanging out with some neighbors that were checking her out. it was pissing me off and i showed it (oh by the way this is aug 07 lol). then comes her bday. she didn't even have me in her plans on her bday when she came back in town for it. i was like what the hell. she told me she wanted time with her friends. right then i began thinking that my cousin was going to be with her and her friend on her bday. i gave her my opinions on what i was thinking of all this, told her that i think shes purposely trying to get me to walk out of the pic voluntarily because she that she could get back with my cousin. i said some pretty strong words to her but nothing like * * * * * , or * * * * * . she agreed to parting ways yet cried a lil. got a message from her 2 weeks later telling me shes sending my stuff back. didn't get them until 5 weeks later (october 07). i acted like i didn't care that she was sending the stuff back and made it sound like i was happy. yeah she even gave me the option to give it to me in person since she was going to be in town but i told her to mail it. still i made no contact after getting the stuff. christmas 07 rolls around so i felt like what the heck i'll tell her merry chirstmas. found out she changed her #. two days later, found out from a friend of mine shes back with my cousin. this time supposely he doesn't work as often and claims he was only studying islam (yet would tell her not to drink) and is now a christian again. those two things, time and religion are what killed it the first two times unless theres something else i dont know about. what are the chances of it working the third time around? do you think she will contact me? i know it will never work out between her and i but at the same time it makes me uncomfortable it could work between the two. what do you guys think? will it work between them or will another problem come up? this is the first time she changed her # on me. she tends to think about a lot stuff all the time plus likes a lot of attention and admits to it. wants to be told i love you every 5 min. lol nice first thread huh?

Link to comment

Hey.......I feel for you, but your story is just part of going through the dating process!

Neither of you are wrong, everyone in your time of life is just feeling their way down the road of the dating game!

it aint easy peoples feeling often get hurt mostly by accident! sometime you have to just move on and except relationships rarely steer in a straight line.

Link to comment

She sounds like a train wreck. One of those people addicted to drama.

And if it doesn't work out with her and your cousin, she'll probably find another guy similar to him.


And yeah maybe she might try to contact you, but I wouldn't think too much about it. I'd keep up the NC thing.

Link to comment


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...