Lilacs Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Hi, My ex texted me on New Years day: "Happy New Year [my name]. I miss you." We had exchanged a brief polite email a few weeks back. And he called last week but didn't leave a message. We haven't spoken since we broke up 2 1/2 months ago. He saw one of my good friends on Saturday and wanted to know how I was. Then he said it was to hard to talk about with her. She told him she thought I would be willing to make it work. She said I was confused about how this all came about. He said he was too. But we both had doubts so it seemed best for us to move on. He confirmed that he hadn't contacted me because he thought that was what I wanted. Then he texts me. I don't want to get my hopes up. I haven't responded. I miss him. But I don't think he's had the epiphany yet. In short we were together 6 years. When I started asking about future committment he said it didn't feel right. We're 25. Thoughts?? Link to comment
CatsMeeoow Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 You know - It could mean nothing and it could mean everything! I know my ex would never ever do something like that unless he really thought about it and meant it. SO for me it would be everything. However, there are those out there who play games whether intentional or not and those 3 little words would have very little value. So how well do you know this guy? Why would he say those things? I think only you know if there is value in them or not. A tough spot I know. You could always text back - I've missed you recently too... and see what happens. Unless he has done this before and you know it means nothing why not take that chance? Sometimes pride is such a strong thing. Best Wishes Link to comment
samross Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 Coming from another guy it sounds like he misses you and wants to see you. TAKE A CHANCE ON LOVE. What have you got to lose? You're in pain anyway, right? And yes, it may hurt more if you do contact him and things don't work out but it sounds like communication (of lack of) may be part of the problem. If you don't contact him you will always wonder. Link to comment
Lilacs Posted January 2, 2008 Author Share Posted January 2, 2008 I think he knows it means something. But I'm not sure he knows what to do with it. I texted back "Happy New Year. I miss you too." I feel like there is nothing else I can do. I'm going away to mexico for a few days which will be a nice break. Hopefully I can clear my head of him. I hope he has the epiphany, but I can't have it for him. You guys are great. I will keep you posted. Link to comment
emalkoc Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 as a guy, He misses you..it is your turn to make a move if you want to.. Link to comment
circi Posted January 2, 2008 Share Posted January 2, 2008 I think he knows it means something. But I'm not sure he knows what to do with it. I texted back "Happy New Year. I miss you too." I feel like there is nothing else I can do. I'm going away to mexico for a few days which will be a nice break. Hopefully I can clear my head of him. I hope he has the epiphany, but I can't have it for him. You guys are great. I will keep you posted. I think you answered perfectly, and have the right mindset. Have a great time in Mexico! Link to comment
Lilacs Posted January 3, 2008 Author Share Posted January 3, 2008 Well yesterday he texted back: "Where are you now?" I waited a few hours because I was over at my friends house. I texted him on my way back to my parents house..."Home". I turned off my phone because I wanted to go to sleep and not be distracted by thinking about whether I would hear from him. This morning I checked my phone... He wrote: "I see. When do you head back to [law school]? I was in New York for new years and I saw [mutual friend]. She said you guys had a fun visit." Oh well. He has definitely not had an epiphany. I think it best that I don't respond. Why would he text "I miss you" and then a casual nothing text??? When we broke up I told him not confuse me by contacting me and telling me such things. When he saw my friend in NY they talked and she told him that I was hurt that he hadn't tried to see how I was doing. She told him I would be willing to make it work. Maybe he was just trying to be nice. His last text is awkward and makes me feel uncomfortable. I love him, and after six years, I don't think I can be his buddy. I miss him. Link to comment
Lilacs Posted January 3, 2008 Author Share Posted January 3, 2008 Do you think I'm right? I shouldn't respond again? Link to comment
zipuzappa Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 If he is referring to the same friend you talking about he is actively thinking about you and what she told him. Link to comment
zipuzappa Posted January 3, 2008 Share Posted January 3, 2008 I would respond "Yes we had great time and we talked a lot." I personally think you should respond but up to you. Link to comment
Lilacs Posted January 5, 2008 Author Share Posted January 5, 2008 I{m in Mexico. I arrived yesterday with a girlfriend of mind. My ex and always traveled together. I really miss him. I didn{t respond to his last text. I was thinking of maybe sending him a post card, saying... In Mexico, then Texas, I{ll be back in two weeks then off to school. Maybe we can catch up before I leave. Wish you were here. Is this a bad idea_ I woke up this morning, and it ached how much I miss him. I{ll check this post later today, hopefully some good advice will be there. I hope you all are having a good weekend full of distractions. p.s. sorry if the punctuations are weird, this computer is acting funny. Link to comment
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