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Why does my GF act like this?


JoogyJoogy

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She will tell me she cheated on me and give me a totally unrealistic circumstance that it happened in break up with me for a day...then the next day laugh and say it is all a joke...2 days ago i brought up my EX and she has not stopped talking about her since and has been being a total she said she cheated on me and gave a totally ridiculous circumstance..then said she was kidding again and that she loves drama...and she keeps saying things like "OMG! you guys are so cute together..i am going to get you guys back together" about my EX. and she will keep telling me all day about it....why is she being like this??..mad...jealous...i dont get it...what do i tell her?...i am also her first boyfriend....one time she played a joke on me that she thought i was gay and said she cant do this anymore...an hour later...she calls up and laughs and say "hahaha..i got you!"

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Your gf acts like this because you let her get away with it. I see from your other posts that this has been going on for a while- and also that she is 18 and you are 20.

 

She basically has no rspect for you, and ses that yo will put up with this crazy/disrespectful behavior.

 

I think the better question is - why do you put up with this?

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She sounds VERY immature - I am guessing she is either VERY young, or older but VERY immature and selfish.

 

I personally would not stay with someone whom liked to create drama, make up lies and play mind games. This is also a good way to cover it up if she DOES cheat one day as she can say it was all another joke.

 

Sorry, I just don't think this is healthy to be with someone like this.

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I like playing "pranks" on my bf, but I don't let it go on for an hour!

Or not even 10 minutes. There are just some jokes which are off limit, like breaking up jokes, and the other jokes about her you mentioned.

 

LIke another poster said, don't let her get away with it. I would be highly annoyed. And it's confusing.

I think she is making jokes about your ex though to be sarcastic. Maybe it irked her you spoke about your ex and she is just throwing it all back in your face...

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i mean like...kind of creul things to each other...like maybe i will call her a * * * * ...and sometimes ask her who was better me or a guy she hooked up with in the past...we know we are not serious...but sometimes i feel it gets serious.

 

I agree with you that calling her out of name is cruel but asking her is better you are someone else is just being cruel to yourself.

Sounds like both of you are immature and just like the name relationship.

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She sounds VERY immature - I am guessing she is either VERY young, or older but VERY immature and selfish.

 

I personally would not stay with someone whom liked to create drama, make up lies and play mind games. This is also a good way to cover it up if she DOES cheat one day as she can say it was all another joke.

 

Sorry, I just don't think this is healthy to be with someone like this.

 

 

I agree with RayKay. She sounds VERY immature and this may be a way for her to cover up her cheating. She's playing with your feelings. Don't allow her to treat you that way.

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yyyeeeaaahhh... there's no reason to act this way. controlling, dominant figures or no... that kind of behavior is hurtful. no denying that on account of your feelings... In a relationship, it can be fun to sometimes jokingly jangle one another's nerves and to poke fun at little flaws or indiscretions, but not with malicious intent.... why would you want to hurt someone that you love? no sense. if this is really an issue for you then you need to communicate this to her. i wouldn't be accusing as you don't want her to take the offensive... just calmly and rationally explain that you're not so much appreciating the mind games and unneccesary drama. discuss issues such as trust and friendship and respect... your honesty may not get you the desired effect that you're hoping for, but at least you can walk away knowing that you did your part to be honest and forthcoming about your relationship difficulties. you would want her to be honest with you, no?

 

also consider things that you could do differently... when two people can meet halfway, you'll find the resolution much easier to come by. good luck!

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If you are going to dish it out, you have to be able to take it as well. If you act disrespectful to her in the guise of a joke, she will act the same way...how does she know when to draw the line when everything seems to be fair game. Maybe what you say to her hurts her as well but since you both claim to be dominant, this has become the way both of you vie for control..and it just gets crueler and crueler. I think you are both immature for behaving this way. Dominance is no excuse...you know what two dominant dogs do...they battle it out and it can get ugly unless the dogs are separated and allowed to cool down. You may be doing this in a supposedly joking manner...but it is no joke and both you realize this deep down. This is two people vying for dominance in the relationship and will only lead to misery and pain and bitterness if it continues unchecked. You both need to sit down and talk about things and come up with a kinder, healthier and more sincere way to joke around with each other.

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i mean like...kind of creul things to each other...like maybe i will call her a * * * * ...and sometimes ask her who was better me or a guy she hooked up with in the past...we know we are not serious...but sometimes i feel it gets serious.

 

Oh, well this explains it. You are mean to her, she is mean to you. Now you want to set boundaries as to just how mean she can be. It doesn't work like that.

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Sounds like you both are pretty immature, controlling, and mean. There is no way that this relationship is healthy, nor will it ever turn into something meaningful. All you both are doing is building resentment, insecurity, and jealousy.

 

Sorry to be harsh, but my advice to both of you is to grow up.

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i mean like...kind of creul things to each other...like maybe i will call her a * * * * ...and sometimes ask her who was better me or a guy she hooked up with in the past...we know we are not serious...but sometimes i feel it gets serious.

 

I had a bf who would joke around with me like this.

We would joke around and call each other names.

We aren't together anymore. IMO it was more a friendship + sexual chemistry. No love.

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Break up with this immature drama queen ASAP.

 

I woulda been annoyed the first "joke" she pulled on me and woulda dropped her fast.

 

Like RayKay has mentioned...She could really be doing these things and tell you to take off some guilt. Kinda like I told him, but didn't really tell him kinda things.

 

Or she could be gauging your reactions to see if she can do this behaviour and then tell you and chalk it up as a "joke."

 

Either way this sounds like a really immature relationship. Either tell her to stop or make her stop by not being with her.

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