Suesser Tod Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 I realized that my work and my "social circle" are not going to allow me to meet a prospect for a relationship anytime soon. So I decided to give online dating a try. $100 USD later I got myself a Match subscription. I've sent over 50 e-mails and like 20 winks, out of those I've got only 4 replies to the winks "thanks bo no thanks". I can't try a different site as it seems Match is the only online dating site in this country. In fact it isn't the only one, but it is the only one worth wasting your time, the others have a few hundred users and very few active users. I've tried re-writing my profile three times, and I get a lot of views, but no single sign of interest. At this point I'm wondering if people in this country are actually open to onlie dating. I have come up with my own theory, there is one group of females that are there for the free ego boost, and the second group, very ugly females. The second thing that bothers me is that only about 20% of the users have a picture. So I can see where I'm heading straight to failure, by not contacting those that don't have a picture, I've dramatically reduced the chances. But, I'm not taking any chances and end up in a date with someone that had to take a DNA test to find out that they were female... Well, any advise will be appreciated. If there is any spanish speaker in here, I'd also appreciate if you could check my profile and give me you opinion about it. Link to comment
withmikenow Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 Try eHarmony. I think I paid $60 for 3 months and I met the guy I am dating now plus before that was talking to several people. I have several friends that have successfully dated on there as well. Link to comment
tiredofvampires Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 What do you mean "only dating site in this country"? You can get onto a site no matter where you live in the world, as far as I know. Also, I know many dating sites cater to "international" clientele. I know Match boasts millions of subscribers "worldwide", as do many others -- in fact, you have to pick your "country" when filling out a profile. I think this is a matter of doing more research into other options as well as Match. I am in very much the same boat as you (it really sucks, because you have to consider long distance, which is what my last relationship was, and LDR, due to a datinig site. I was on link removed) What I ended up doing was trying to find a more selective "niche" of people that I thought would be more on my wavelength, after my last relationship broke up. I googled "spiritual" and "dating site", because I wanted certain kinds of like-minded people, and I came up with a handful of choices, one of which I put up a rudimentary profile on (just the bare bones, no pictures or anything else, since I was really not ready to "get back out in the market" yet). There are plenty of members in Europe, South America, other continents on there....I've even seen alternate laguages (from English) on other sites as well. So there are plenty of possible choices I think, and you can subscribe from any country, so I don't know what would make you think you are limited by country. The site I am sort of "on", when I go there to browse, I see guys from Switzerland "online now" and I could contact them if I chose, so long as we were both subscribed to the basics on the site. Maybe try googling a variety of things with "dating site"? "International", "Mexico", "Spanish speaking", etc.? You might find other selections. I really think Match is not the best, for me anyway. Link to comment
tiredofvampires Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 Try eHarmony. I think I paid $60 for 3 months and I met the guy I am dating now plus before that was talking to several people. I have several friends that have successfully dated on there as well. Just curious -- are you guys long distance? Link to comment
Suesser Tod Posted January 1, 2008 Author Share Posted January 1, 2008 I tried e-harmony and after spending an hour and a half filling out the questionaries I got the dreaded "no matches" message. I also tried meetic and, that's about it. Match is not the only dating site in this country, but it is the only dating site if you want to find more than 1 or 2 active users in a day. What are other dating sites? Maybe I'm missing the most obvious ones. Link to comment
withmikenow Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 No, he lives about 45 minutes away. So we have been seeing each other alot. I set my parameters to only get matched with people 120 miles away or less ... sometimes I got matched a little farther, but never more than say a 6 hour drive away ... that I guess would be long distance but still close enough for weekend trips ... either way I got lucky my new guy drives to me every couple of days. Link to comment
withmikenow Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 I tried e-harmony and after spending an hour and a half filling out the questionaries I got the dreaded "no matches" message. I also tried meetic and, that's about it. Match is not the only dating site in this country, but it is the only dating site if you want to find more than 1 or 2 active users in a day. What are other dating sites? Maybe I'm missing the most obvious ones. I also had "no matches" the first day and it was a slow start. you have to be patient. After a week I had over a hundred ... but the first couple days were SLOW ... now I have HUNDREDS (its been a month) but I also am seeing someone ... so I am not interested in the others. Link to comment
JadedStar Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 Given the lack of success I woudln't rule out all of those ads without a pic. Many women don't post a pic not because they are ugly but for privacy. They may not want everyone in their area to see they are on a dating site. I'd start contacting more w/out a pic. Most will probably email you a pic right away if they are interested. Link to comment
Suesser Tod Posted January 1, 2008 Author Share Posted January 1, 2008 I also had "no matches" the first day and it was a slow start. you have to be patient. After a week I had over a hundred ... but the first couple days were SLOW ... now I have HUNDREDS (its been a month) but I also am seeing someone ... so I am not interested in the others. It wouldn't let me join because it wasn't able to match me to anyone. Link to comment
NO1GR8r Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 Hey, I tried match - over 12k hits five dates - zero success - two friends for life...go figure. Better off going the conventional way. "Hi, My name is..." and take it from there. And it is FREE. So, Don't sweat it...Ironically. the one I fell in love with, I met on MySPace. Go figure Better luck (in the Super Market) next time. Link to comment
Suesser Tod Posted January 1, 2008 Author Share Posted January 1, 2008 Hey, I tried match - over 12k hits five dates - zero success - two friends for life...go figure. Better off going the conventional way. "Hi, My name is..." and take it from there. And it is FREE. So, Don't sweat it... Better luck (in the Super Market) next time. I wish it was like that here. Supermarkets are not a good place to meet single females, I can tell you because I've already tried it. In this country people move out of their parents houses once they marry or move in with someone, so at the supermarket the only young girls you'll meet are in a relationship, and 99% of the times (in fact, it has been 100% for me) they are there with their SO. There are no laundry mats that I'm aware of around here. Cofee shops are another no-go, as people here go to them with their friends, you never see people alone in those places. Community activities? Here they are non-existant. 22 million people in this crappy city, yet the only way to get to them seems to be "social networking". However, I decided to work in a field where there are very few females and my coworkers are in the same situation as I am. At college it is a bit different, I'm the younges guy in the group. All of my classmates are either married or divorced, and the people they know are way past my age bracket... 2008 is going to be a lonely year... Link to comment
Pegasus Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 Hm...seems like central or eastern Europe. Correct? Link to comment
Suesser Tod Posted January 1, 2008 Author Share Posted January 1, 2008 Hm...seems like central or eastern Europe. Correct? Nope, Mexico City, Mexico. Link to comment
Luke Skywalker Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 Nope, Mexico City, Mexico. Gracious me - you are having troubles in Mexico City??? - I thought that place was crawling with chicks - you got latinofriendfinder, plentyoffish, lots of internet sites that will cover those areas. Link to comment
bigthings46 Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 sorry to hear but I kinda agree. Match and eHarmony both didn't do a damn thing for me. I was on eHarmony for 6 months, and I hate to say it but most of the girls on there were overweight. The few girls that I was attracted to never answered questions I sent or others would request communication and then leave me hanging. I just cancelled my subscription today as it was suppose to renew tomorrow and Im not wasting any more of my cash. Match, I sent out a bunch of emails, no replys. Plentyoffish, I have been on for a week and only got 3 views. I know I am not a bad looking guy cuz I am constantly told how cute I am(not by my mother either). The only luck I have had was on craiglist were I met a really cool girl, had a great first date, setup a day 2 after her saying we should get together again and she cancelled on me telling me I was too nice. The online dating game is wack man . Link to comment
Suesser Tod Posted January 1, 2008 Author Share Posted January 1, 2008 Gracious me - you are having troubles in Mexico City??? - I thought that place was crawling with chicks - you got latinofriendfinder, plentyoffish, lots of internet sites that will cover those areas. Crawling with chicks? LOL! Yes, there are plenty of women in here, most of them ugly, a lot of them ugly beyond belief. The sad truth is that Mexicans are ugly people. Every TV actor/actress can trace her family roots to other countries, the only thing Mexican about them is that they were born here. If you want a good looking woman, your dating pool is reduced greatly, and to make it worse, most of them will be coming from mid-high to high income families. Obviously being a mid-class guy I'm going for those girls, not the ugly low income gals, read below for more information. (That being said, and I'm aware I'm probably going to get flamed, it's extremely hard to meet them.) It's even hard to meet the low income gals. Mexican culture has a strong foundation of class separation, so people do not mix if they come from different classes. I've met quite a few good looking (Pocahontas like) lower income girls, they reject me the moment where they find out where I live, where I work, etc. Obviously the opposite is true, I can't go very high in the classes ladder, or I'll be quickly shot down. So well, you can see that even with 20 million people out there, the dating pool is quite limited and out of the girls that I could date, very few of them look into online dating. In fact, I'm aware that I've crossed class boundaries when contacting some of the girls in Match. Either way, people in here do not hang out alone, so most of the usual pick up places that an American would think of are non existant here. Yes, I can try going to supermarkets, cofee shops even a laundry mat if I find one, but they won't be there alone. That is why the only way to meet them is through social networking. But my social network is limited, and it won't get me a date, I know that for a fact. That is why once I analyzed my options, I realized that online dating is looking like the only option for me. Link to comment
Suesser Tod Posted January 1, 2008 Author Share Posted January 1, 2008 Gracious me - you are having troubles in Mexico City??? - I thought that place was crawling with chicks - you got latinofriendfinder, plentyoffish, lots of internet sites that will cover those areas. By the way, at this point I've tried 5 different dating sites. None seems to beat Match. Here is an example, just did a quick search in plentyoffish, here are the results: There are 19 females from Mexico City in there (any kind of relationship) Out of those 19, 5 were online today, 2 were online this week, and the rest haven't been online since the last month. Unfortunately, the results haven't been much different for the other sites that I've tried. Match is the only one that seems to have a considerable amount of active users. Link to comment
Luke Skywalker Posted January 1, 2008 Share Posted January 1, 2008 It's even hard to meet the low income gals. Mexican culture has a strong foundation of class separation, so people do not mix if they come from different classes. I've met quite a few good looking (Pocahontas like) lower income girls, they reject me the moment where they find out where I live, where I work, etc. Woah there, I understand if a higher class girl rejects you because you are lower than she is, but a lower class girl rejecting you because you are a higher class sounds weird because isn't the man suppose to be the higher up than the girl? Am I reading this right? Link to comment
Suesser Tod Posted January 1, 2008 Author Share Posted January 1, 2008 Woah there, I understand if a higher class girl rejects you because you are lower than she is, but a lower class girl rejecting you because you are a higher class sounds weird because isn't the man suppose to be the higher up than the girl? Am I reading this right? You are reading that right. People only socialize with others within the same class. Yes, there are exceptions to the rule, but they are few. It's so deeply embedded into people's minds that even if someone manages to make enough money to move to a higer class, they will continue interacting with the lower class people. For example, the neighbors next door at my parent's place. This guy made a lot of money with his landscaping bussines, they eventually moved to this mid class area, next to my parents house. I lived there for 25 years and I never saw his wife. They avoided any contact with the neighbors, and when you ran into them in the street, they would move out of your way and look down to the ground. Also there is always some sort of resentment to the higer clases. A cultural thing that remains from Mexico being Spain's colony. Mexicans were basically slaves, and the Spaniards were the higer classes, so the lower classes are resentfull torwards the higer classes. That is yet another reason why people don't want to interact with people from a lower/higher class. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.