I lost a good friend

[embers rise]

There's this guy that I work with, he's one of my supervisors. We've worked together for about 5 years and we became good friends about 8 months ago and it was cool, we were like brothers from another mother. We'd hang out and we both had the same problems with depression and women, so he was someone I could really talk to and vice versa. Lately I've gone through alot of mishaps in my life and it kinda reflected on our friendship a bit, like I'd get angry with him at times, but it would pass. I'd ask insecure questions, "are u still po'ed at me?", "we're still friends right?" etc. A couple times I'd see him in a bad mood and I'd do something goofy to try and cheer him and he'd get angry with me. And I apologized, but that didn't seem to work. Slowly he started acting standoffish towards me. Then just the other day it happened, he told me not to talk to him anymore unless it's work related and that we can't hang out anymore. He said we should've never been friends in the first place cause it's against company policy (he's one of my superiors). I feel really bad, I lost my best friend. I can't really sleep, I stay up trying to figure out a solution, but I can't seem to find one. I know I can't say anything to him, cause he'd get mad. What should I do? Just let it go or should I even attempt at fixing things? I don't want to have beef with anyone, especially someone I called my friend.

[rusty_boi]

id give him some space and let him calm down, then try sort out ure issues together

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Just let it go. Recognize the mistakes you made and learn from them. If you try to push the friendship now, it will just make things worse. Back off and just keep it strictly professional and find other friends.

[KG]

Yeah,

Slow it down, you don't know what might be going on in his life right now!

If he wants space...give it!

[embers rise]

Yeah, backing off does sound like the best option. I wish there was a better way. Other employees have mentioned that he's become real bossy lately. I guess I'm just gonna have to deal with the pain of losing a friend for now. Hopefully in the future things will turn back around and be like they used to be. Now I don't really know how to act around him, I guess I'll try my best to avoid him.

[mannymanman]

I have to agree with everyone, the situation all things considered requires that you give him his space. For some, our jobs are one of the most important things there are and the thing that allows a roof to be over our heads.

 

Having said that, what I have to key on here the most is that you rightfully feel that you've lost your BEST friend. I'd say don't feel badly that you're loosing sleeping over this. Does that prove that your vunerable? Sure. But it also shows that your human and I think that too often us men are expected to brush these kinds of things off like it doesn't matter. As if friendships mean so much less to us as men compared to women. Don't let anyone tell you that your worrying is a weakness.

 

Even if this was all a company policy deal (it most probably isn't), your friend could have been way more tactfull and let you down a lot easier than he did. If this were my best friend, he better have a damn good excuse about what is going on is his life if he wanted a friendship to continue. That is just expecting too much strength from your close friend to verbally end the friendship and then try to come back and apologize.

 

I feel for you and if I were you I'd be looking for a hug - seriously.