Just thought I would share an interesting story...!

[NewPhillyGuy]

A bit from NPG history - This happened about 6 months ago. Although I was really hurt at the time, I'm able to look back now, laugh a little, and thinking about this girl does make me smile most times. I'm not sure if I am looking for advice, but perhaps more just interested in telling a story. Hope you guys like it and maybe get something out of it. I know I tend to be long-winded, but I'll try (really!) to keep it short.

 

So, I'm on myspace. I'm primarily on there to keep up with my friends. I don't use it to go trolling for women - lol. One day, I'm on there just reading up on my friends and I get a friend request from this gorgeous girl. I'm thinking - no way. This is spam. I clicked on her profile, and I read it. Definitely not spam - the page looked genuine. She wrote alot about herself, her friends, etc. So, I thought, what the heck. I accepted her. She sent me a msg and asked me for my screen name and that she'd like to talk to me. I figured what the heck, so I gave it to her. I was so curious though. I live on the east coast. This girl lives out west. She's in her 20s, gorgeous, what the heck is she messaging random guys on myspace thousands of miles away for?

 

She IMs, and pretty quickly tells me my profile is really interesting, I'm hot, and just starts asking me about myself, etc. I was actually getting over a heartbreak at that time, so I was pretty nasty to her in response. I remember she messaged me the first time, and I said something really bad like - "sorry you got dumped - can't you find a rebound guy closer to you." Horrible, I know. She did tell me that she did have a boyfriend and they were going through rough times. Interestingly enough, she just brushed off what I said to her and kept talking to me. I asked her how the heck she found me on the opposite side of the country. She said she had a friend from high school who lives in my state, was looking for him, and came upon my profile. I told her I didn't believe it, but she insisted. She msged me everyday for weeks, and we talked alot about so much stuff and I loved talking to her. We started talking pretty much everyday on IM. I think after a week or two, she IMed me one day and gave me her number, asked if I would call her sometime.

 

Talking became a daily thing for us - texting, IMing, calling, emailing you name it. We talked about lots of stuff - work, school, problems with her b/f too. Eventually, things started to change between us and she admitted that she had feelings for me. I was starting to like her too, but I was just like - no way. She lives so far away. She has a boyfriend. I'm not doing this. I continued to talk to her, told myself not to get in emotionally, but it happened.

 

Now, here's where it gets interesting. Two of my friends decided they are moving accross the country to the state where this girl lives. I was heartbroken to be losing both of them (they are sisters). So, I decided that I was going to fly out for a week and visit the sisters. I mentioned to this girl that I was planning to come out to her state and she went nuts. She was like we have to meet up and go out. I thought about it for about a week, and I said ok, I'm going to see my friends anyway, so no harm in hanging out with this girl.

 

I buy my ticket, and I tell her. She's ecstatic, and THEN a bomb gets dropped. The day after I bought my ticket, she messages me and starts talking about her boyfriend. She said she wanted to work things out with him. I was really upset. It was so stupid of me to get upset, because I knew she had a boyfriend in the first place. I got so mad at her. I told her I was still coming but would definitely not be seeing her. She was really upset at me. I totally blocked her out, stopped talking to her altogether. I was devastated. We were talking about hanging out, her meeting my friends, all of us chilling, etc, plus I was crushing on the girl, and then she tells me that. I felt kinda led on, but it was my own fault. I knew she had a b/f, and I should not have allowed myself to dive in that deep.

 

The next morning, I get an email from her telling me how sorry she was. She said when I stopped talking to her, she realized how much she missed me and how strongly she felt for me. She said she was willing to break up with her boyfriend for me, and begged me to hang out with her when I came. I wised up by then. What I told was there was little chance of us being together anyway, because she lives so far away. I told her that I was sorry for the way I acted too, and we could still hang out as friends when I come out there. I said I would regret not even getting to meet her. She agreed with me, and we continued to talk like we always did, but things were toned back. A month passes with things like that, and then I fly out there.

 

So, I arrive and spend a day with my friend. The next night, I'm at my hotel waiting for her to show up. The plan was to go get a dinner, a movie, and then hit the town with her friends. She lived about an hour away from where I was staying, and it was so funny, because there I was giving her directions in her own state! She got lost and was 30 minutes late, me on the phone with her trying to get her to where I was staying - lol. She finally pulls up, and I go outside not knowing what to expect. Sure, I've seen pictures, but we all have our internet horror stories. Maybe it was a HUGE girl, maybe it was a guy, maybe it was some serial killer. I didn't know. She pulls up in her red jeep, just like she told me, and out steps this absolutely GORGEOUS, tall, blonde girl, just like in the pictures - long hair down to her shoulders, dressed very nicely with a black shirt and a skirt just above her knees. She came up to me, smiled, gave me a hug. I was in absolute awe. I was like this is NOT real.

 

So, we go out, and she insists on paying for EVERYTHING. I had to fight with her to split whatever we did. I paid for dinner, but had to fight that. She paid for the movie, and then she kept buying me drinks when we went bar-hopping downtown. The whole night, she never did anything over the top or overly flirty, which I was very happy about. She was so sweet though. She introduced me to her friends and seemed so happy the whole time. Wherever we went, she stuck right next to me. She put her arm in mine most of the time. When we were out at the clubs, if I walked off to get a drink or just to check out what was going in this or that corner, she would come over to me and just start making conversation. I was wearing a sleeveless shirt, and there were a few places that I could not get into because of that. Although her friends would just go right in and not even notice me stuck at the door, she would wait behind for me, argue with the doorman, lol. Eventually, she ran off and spent $15 buying me a shirt so I could get in without trouble. She was just so sweet and polite. I was just amazed. I actually flew back and forgot the shirt, and she mailed it out to me!

 

We were out until 3am and went back to her friend's hotel room to sleep. We did sleep next to each other, but nothing at all happened. To be honest, I would have been put off if she tried to mess around or something after everything we talked about. We just talked, and it was really, really nice.

 

The next day, I was leaving to come home. I was really upset about leaving my friends, and yes, I was upset about leaving her, although I said nothing about that to her. We headed back to my hotel, where she had left her car. I was getting my suitcase together, and she told me she wanted to take a picture of us together before she left. We took a few pictures sitting on one of the beds in the room. She was sitting really close to me. We were just talking, and she told me how much she was going to miss me. I said the same and that I had a great time. We just looked at each other, and she kissed me. She did it again. It was the most amazing feeling ever. She said she had to go, so I walked her out to her car. I looked at her, and I got pulled in again. I kissed her. It was amazing. She left.

 

This happened about 6 months ago. We've been talking, but not as much as before - probably a few times a month. So, you all are probably wondering why I write about this. Well, I am nervous as hell. I'll tell you why.

 

Tomorrow, I am getting on a plane to go visit my friends the sisters. I called up this girl and told her I might be coming yesterday, but was checking out ticket prices. She blew up. She begged me to come, and started telling me how much she would love to see me again. I was looking online and all of the tickets were so expensive, so I told her I might not do it. She was bugging the heck out of me to come - she even offered 4x to split my ticket, and later said she would even pay for it if I would come. I told her no way. I would never allow that. I eventually found a ticket, made plans to stay with my friends. (I should have mentioned that she's now very good friends with my friends. I introduced them, and they all hang out all the time).

 

I told the sisters to not tell this girl a thing, and I told her that the tickets were too expensive and that I could not come. She was upset, and said she hoped I would come maybe in a few months, and I told her I would definitely look into it. She offered again to split my ticket and again to buy it for me. I said no way. She has no idea I'm going to be showing up tomorrow night. My friends are going to invite her over, and I'm just gonna be there.

 

I don't expect anything to go anywhere with this girl, but I am really happy to see her. I think she's going to blow a gasket when she sees me.

 

Anyway, I just thought it was a nice story to share. It was a very nice memory, although it was hurtful at first. I will definitely never forget this girl and how she treated me when I came out to see her. I'm just so curious about how things are going to be when I see her tomorrow.

 

Any comments?

[ghost69]

is she still with her bf now after 6 months? it seems like you want to surprise her like it's going to go somewhere. it's a sweet idea, but i think you can make a really great friend out of this girl if not romantically. depends on what you want though. you weren't very clear on this at this point. it was clear in your detailed depiction of the earlier part. but after the 6 months you didn't comment much on what you want outta her now.

[NewPhillyGuy]

is she still with her bf now after 6 months? it seems like you want to surprise her like it's going to go somewhere. it's a sweet idea, but i think you can make a really great friend out of this girl if not romantically. depends on what you want though. you weren't very clear on this.

 

I feel the same way I did 6 months ago. She lives too far away, so I don't want anything romantically with her. I do want to continue being friends though, and it's going to be great seeing her again.

[NewPhillyGuy]

I missed your question, and to answer, no, she's not with her boyfriend anymore. They broke up about 2 months ago.

[ghost69]

oh. so you have a chance to hook up though. yes?

[NewPhillyGuy]

oh. so you have a chance to hook up though. yes?

 

It's possible, but I'm not going for it. I guess the reason why I wrote all of this is because I'm really nervous about seeing her again and how I'm going to feel. Like, what if she acts the way she did 6 months ago and is so great to me and everything. My emotions are going to get stirred up for sure, but I will put a brake on them.

 

The other weird thing - I love flying. I think it's kinda fun, but for some reason, I'm terrified of this trip. I keep wondering if the damn plane is going to go down or some crap - lol.

 

Also, a little bit of "buyer's remorse" too. I was not planning this trip. My friends called me up last night, and were like get your a** out here. My New Year's plans fell through, so I was thinking and thinking and thinking. I was like - I could most probably sit at home for the next few days or I could go see some people. The trip is kind of expensive, seeing as I bought the tickets last minute (just yesterday to leave on sat), but not too bad considering it's the holiday season. My friend letting me stay at her house (friend, not the girl) also helped to keep the cost down.

 

The whole thing is just driving me nuts, but it's done. I bought the ticket and off I go!

 

Oh ghost, I think you had your location up on here a while ago. If I remember correctly, I am coming to your state!

[DN]

You know what - relax. Enjoy the trip and meeting your friends and whatever happens with this girl - happens.

 

OK - so it's a little expensive- just write it down to a splurge! And make sure you enjoy it because if you don't your buyer's remorse will really kick in.

[NewPhillyGuy]

You know what - relax. Enjoy the trip and meeting your friends and whatever happens with this girl - happens.

 

OK - so it's a little expensive- just write it down to a splurge! And make sure you enjoy it because if you don't your buyer's remorse will really kick in.

 

You're right, DN. That's what I'm going to do.

 

I'm really glad that I can stay with my friends. They asked me to come out, but I wasn't sure, at first, what the arrangements would be. I was looking at hotels, and the package price went up like mad. I was telling this girl, and she was like you can stay with the girls (my friends). I knew they were having some other people out there to visit too, so I felt really, really bad asking them to stay over. Fortunately, what happened was, my one friend just texted me and I was like we have plenty of room - don't worry about a hotel and get your a** out here. lol.

 

The girl actually told me if that didn't work out, she would split the cost of a hotel room with me for a couple days. I was like no way - lol. Oh man....

[ghost69]

uh oh philly. lol. not here.

[NewPhillyGuy]

uh oh philly. lol. not here.

 

Oh yes bro! I am gonna be all over your territory!

[ghost69]

Oh yes bro! I am gonna be all over your territory!

 

just leave some women for me. that's all i ask. hope u have a great time. lots to do around here.

[Dating Coach]

Go, but this time close the deal. This may never work out between you, but you will always have this moment. Take her out alone, end up alone, and have the experience of a lifetime. If you don't, you both may always regret it.

[NewPhillyGuy]

Go, but this time close the deal.

 

and by that you mean...what I think you mean?

[ghost69]

yeah he talking about bangin.

[Dating Coach]

and by that you mean...what I think you mean?

 

Yes, it does. If you go there and she doesn't want to, cool, but chances are she wants to. She won't say that, because that would be "unlady like" so don't discuss it. Just go for it. It won't ruin things if she says she's not ready, but it will immortalize things for you if she does. Go for it.