Yikes! I ran into her

[Lionel Hutz]

So my ex was in town for the winter break. She did not call, which I was not surprised about, and I saw her in a club last night. It was really akward since we kinda broke up long distance and have been negotiating the exchange of our belongings. It tore me up inside since I was not able to tell her how I felt.

 

It feels terrible, we went from being lovers in a committed live in relationship, to just someone I say hi to in passing. I could tell she got a bit uneasy when we were just kinda hanging out and I wasnt really interacting with her but more with the mutual friends who were there. I was trying not to make eye contact due to the fact that I probably would have melted. I could also sense she was a bit embarrased that I saw her talking to another guy. I still want to be with her and cant seem to figure a time or place to tell her and it seems that we both have things we want to say but dont know how. How do I break the ice? How can I let her know that things are different? Im thinking that I could tell her some of my resolutions for the new year, and maybe see if when the summer arrives we can start fresh. I only think I have a shot because when we did exchange more than a few words she says I look good, and she kept complimenting me on my clothes and hair. She may have just been being polite, but I feel she was trying to have a serious conversation with me. I did not want to let my guard down though.

 

Suggestions, Thoughts, Comments.

[Lionel Hutz]

I had got into legal trouble for habitual offenses, which she helped me out with. Helped me bail out of jail and pay fines. We also had a tough time making ends meet, and that lead to very stressful arguments about money. She had a silver spoon and I did not which created some social separation. Example: She wants to go to concert and get backstage. Tickets cost $100 each. I could do something like this once a year whereas every concert that came to town she was going by default (dad paid). This lead to me staying home and her going out.Other things happened like this a few times. .In the end we both got very insecure and called it quits.She and I both said we hoped we could get back together when the dust settled.I say Summer since she will not have any courses and will be back home. I dont think it would work in my favor to pressure her with getting back together while she is in College. Things have changed greatly in my life. I have a much better job making twice what I did last year and all of the legal mumbo jumbo is behind me. I feel like I am ready to be what I was in the beginning which was who she wanted. That make sense?

[Lionel Hutz]

I would not expect her to put her life on hold. Im thinking of breaking the moderate NC and kind of warming up to us being good friends again, then maybe between the first of the year and june we can figure it out.

[CatsMeeoow]

I'm glad that you've gotten yourself together... Good for YOU!!!

 

I think you need to come to terms that if she is used to having Daddy give her things that will probably always continue. If it bothers you then it will bother you again in the future.

 

Sounds like she needs to grow up too and learn how to stand on her own two feet and manage her own budget. Sure it's great when Daddy sents extra money for a special night out (gosh knows I'll always be a daddy's girl too!) but to have it happen routinely could certainly spell disaster for you in the long run.

 

Just my two cents!

[Lionel Hutz]

Yes this is true. I know now since she has started at the University the economic outpatient care has stopped. Plus i have much gotten over the insecurity of not being a provider. She was spoiled, plain and simple, and I have come to terms that thats how she was raised. I also know she has alot of respect for the fact that I can stand on my own two. Now that I am financially stable things would be better. I hate to make it sound like our problems mainly stemmed from money. That is not the case. Her level of maturity changed since we got together when she was 18 and she is now 22, naturally she and I changed, but last night I could sense she missed being close to me. A friend said "I could read both of your minds up there last night, why are you two kidding yourself?" SOOOOOOOOOO Confusing! Argh

[Lionel Hutz]

if your paths should meet in the future revaluate things then.

 

I think this I am in that stage right now. The other guy, peh, she totaly neglected him when I got there gave me a hug and kinda sliced him out of the picture. Naturally we have both moved on, if I would not have saw her last night I would have most definitely talked to a few ladies (actually there were very few attractive ones last night.) Ill call her after the New Year and see how things go. Talk about resolutions and school, simple basic stuff and see where that goes. Hoping for the best and prepared for the worst. If not, screw it. Im 25, making good money, healthy,handsome, talented and educated.

[Lionel Hutz]

She just called me right now to say she was glad to see me. the call ended with her saying "I love you and I miss you, I hope i can say that without it being weird." She comes back in a month and wants to go to dinner. I told her to let me know a few days in advance so I could make a reservation. Im taking baby steps so I dont screw this up.Wish me luck.