I'm 17 -He's 25 and has a son.

[pseudomindacious]

I met this guy through my best girlfriend who actually likes his bestfriend who is also alot older than her.

Now this all seemed so crazy to me. Never would I have EVER imagined to start having some sort of feelings for someone so much older who also has a son... I've always thought it was wrong (of course the age -legally it is, whatever), but does anyone hear me out? I suppose you just really never understand until it happens to you.

I honestly really do like him. I don't mind he has a son really I love kids, I've basically helped raise my nieces since I was ten and I love them to death. he doesn't have full custody of him and rarely sees him but I can see his son is the light of life and that really went straight to the heart. But anyways I want to know what he's all about and as does he. And for once I feel that it's mutual.

Maturity wise, I have grown up so much faster than other people my age. I've seen a lot and been through so much. I've been in many relationships but I have never felt so attracted to someone plus I've been honest with him right off the bat.

Now I had dropped out of highschool my ninth grade year due to family issues but I have gone back and have almost completed my G.E.D. courses, not only that, I have received an $8,000 scholarship to go to college for nursing which I plan on doing right when I turn eighteen. Since I chose to drop out I know I need to work harder and faster.

 

I just really need advice. Good and Bad. I definatly feel like we are equals and on eachothers level. But I really don't know how to go about this.

I don't know where to start. Regardless I really want to give it a shot.

[Bunney]

Heya, people on this forum are going to tell you, uh back off, you're too young.

 

But I understand age gap relationships, like yours, cause I've been in the situation myself.

 

To be honest, I don't see that big of a problem here - just give it a try

 

Take care girl.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Wait until you turn 18 and complete your GED before you do anything about this. At your age, do you really want to get tied down to someone who has a child? You have so much to experience, so much to do...being with him is not going to be all hearts and flowers...he has a child whom he is responsible for, both emotionally and financially...he has got an ex who bore a child with him...so she will be forever connected to him in some way. Why does he not see his child so often? What is the visitation? Does he have the child on weekends? How does he get along with his ex? There are so many things you need to consider before getting involved with someone who has a child...the challenge is, in many cases, frustrating for women who are older and more firmly established in their life. Think about it long and hard before you get involved.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

I think when you are 18 and it is legal you can date him if you like, but please be careful for his sake too... depending on where you live, it could be a felony that puts him in jail and gets on his record making him a sex offender. such a conviction might even affect his custody arrangements with his son if his ex finds out about it.

 

congratulations on the scholarship! i think you should focus on your school and on being just a friend to him until you hit 18, then you can date him, if you are still interested and so is he.

[Olive.Juice]

I think when you are 18 and it is legal you can date him if you like, but please be careful for his sake too... depending on where you live, it could be a felony that puts him in jail and gets on his record making him a sex offender. such a conviction might even affect his custody arrangements with his son if his ex finds out about it.

 

congratulations on the scholarship! i think you should focus on your school and on being just a friend to him until you hit 18, then you can date him, if you are still interested and so is he.

 

 

This is great advise.

[Natty7]

I completely understand age-gap relationships and normally I don't see anything wrong with them at all. But you need to follow the above advice and wait until you are 18. I know it might seem like forever until that time comes, but you will be happy you waited. (when do you turn 18?)

 

In the meantime, just be friends. This will also show you how serious this guy is about a relationship. If he holds out and you remain friends without the physical relations yet, you can be sure that he is a great guy since he was willing to wait for you. And when you do turn 18, it will be that much more special, passionate and unbelievable since you have allowed the much needed build up.

 

Take it slow. You both are young and have ALL the time in the world~

 

Take a piece of paper. Now write age one in the bottom-middle of the page. Then draw a line to the top of the page and write.... what is the average age women are passing away these days?.... let's say 80, go ahead and write 80 at the top-middle of the page. Now... you should have a vertical line in front of you... where is 17 years of age, guesstimate and go ahead and put a little dot on the line there. You will see, you have time.