I hate holidays and what can go wrong

[lightn]

i just hate holidasy never been good and looks like another year being alone. It totally sucks. I hate it. What can go wrong this holiday.

 

First of all when I came on ENA I was in a tough position, with my ex and of course after that job changes( had to leave) and then had to file BK. I thought things were not going to turn around and it did. I found a good job me making good money for 2.5 years and loving it. I did not have contact of my ex for a year till she showed up at my job wanting a different job because she is struggling finacially after she moved out of her parents house. Grant there was contact before the year because she found out that my dad passed away but that was the last contact. After she did that we were talikng and she showed me her house etc. I was trying to get her in, but she felt that they ddi not want her but I stated right they are looking at different options. However when we were at the dinner table she was texting while I was there and it was very rude. I was mad that I sent her email and putting it all on the table etc even though she told verbally that she issues with her parents etc and when her issues work out that she will consider. When I sent her the email, I felt good telling her the ball is in her court. Not a response and did not expect one.

However today , I was in a car accident and texted her stating I was in one and she responded who is this, no clue etc so I called her(stupid me) and stated who it was and she stated she deleted my # but however she stated now is the time to get truck you wanted and did ask are you ok. I was real short and told she can call if she wishes and her response was I will keep it in mind. Yes, I had already sent her a xmas card but don;t expect a response. I guess I am really seeing now how immature she is and only for herself. I gave and gave being the nice guy I was I get stomped on.

Anyway beside that setup, the xmas holiday really stinks. NEver been good, and of course my dad anniversary death coming next month of 2 years.

I took the days off from work after 2 years of not wanting to take off and I did and get into a car accident coming back from the dentist. It was the womans fault for jumping in front of me and T-boned her. IT was a shock. My suv in which I took care of since it has a 5.0 engine I was saddended but who knows it may be able to be fixed. Right now one good thing for a rental I am driving a 07 mustang. It is sweet.

 

It seems to me I guess being a nice guy, it really stinks and it seems to me I will probably never find one and if I do I will probably compare to my ex and not only that will not be able to open up all the way. Have I even tried dating, Nope, just been busy at work and working out at the gym. Do I take time for myself, hardly but did buy a 10.1 Nikon Digital camera whcih I will test out.

 

I guess maybe too many setbacks just happened all at once today, and feeling this way but I just cannot wait till the holidays pass but true then comes valentines day and bdays etc.

 

They say things happen for a reson, but I don;t see it this way and or when one door shuts another one opens. yeah right has not happened to me yet with relationships. Maybe I have to be come a bad boy, but then again that will become old too.

What can go wrong does go wrong and right now things are going wrong.

 

Thanks for reading, If you think I am negative I am sorry, but that is the way I feel.

[Dako]

This sounds sappy and scripted, but this season is about giving. If you can help someone in a bad way, the buzz is sweet.

[wiser]

They say things happen for a reson, but I don;t see it this way and or when one door shuts another one opens.

 

Those are just sayings. Things happen as a "result of something", which could be called a reason. For example, if someone falls asleep and has a car accident, then the falling asleep is the reason for the accident. But it doesnt mean that because the accident happened, some other door will "open for the person" such as the opportunity to buy a new car. That might be the ultimate result, but it wasn't "caused by" the accident.

 

Those who say that there is some sort of ultimate purpose for good and bad things to happen are suggesting that there is some sort of guiding force that is using the incident as a means to an end, and I say that is simply not true.

 

Sure, you can have a positive attitude, and you can look at the car accident as a good excuse to buy a new car, or a job loss as an opportunity for a better paying position, or a broken relationship as a possibity to meet someone better for you, but its not like the first thing happened so that the second one will because there is some sort of guiding force working in your favor.

 

It's a matter of making bad things work for you by having a positive attitude.

[lightn]

This sounds sappy and scripted, but this season is about giving. If you can help someone in a bad way, the buzz is sweet.

 

Dako:

So I do not see how this sounds scripted. It is how I feel. You must think that I read out of a script. I gues maybe you just cannot understand the emotions, possible. I have tried to help and give even not during this time of the season.

[Dako]

Often people who feel crappy during the holidays are admonished to work in a soup kitchen or help the poor. My inner dialog sensed how my words would come off to someone with personal issues that seemed insurmountable, hence my reference to sappy and scripted bromides.

My own.

 

Sorry for the confusion.

[AwdreeHpburn]

yeh - I think what he meant was that what he was about to say may sound scripted but.... and then he gave his words, Nay PEARLS of wisdom.

 

But I wanted to say lightn, that I agree that the holidays suck! I'm right with ya. But none the less, I do hope things get better for you. Sorry you're feelings so isolated and alone.

 

Best to you, now through the holidays and every other day too.

[lightn]

yeh - I think what he meant was that what he was about to say may sound scripted but.... and then he gave his words, Nay PEARLS of wisdom.

 

But I wanted to say lightn, that I agree that the holidays suck! I'm right with ya. But none the less, I do hope things get better for you. Sorry you're feelings so isolated and alone.

 

Best to you, now through the holidays and every other day too.

 

Thanks Awdreehpburn. I really appreciate it. I guess maybe I should not have taken the time off work and just keep working and make money but my boss suggested I should take time off and then the accident happened and then with my ex who does not know what she wants and wonder maybe I should just have stayed working. Being single and not sharing the holiday spirit with anyone it make it harder. As for friends, no I do not ask because I do not want to intrude.

 

Dako: Thanks for clarifying the statement.