Ahhh Posted December 19, 2007 Share Posted December 19, 2007 Here's the story as quick as I can sum it up. I met a girl in college 7 years ago. Her name was C. We went out a few times, had sex once, but we never made a true commitment to each other. She moved away for a year to do an internship and I ended up getting with her roommate. Still I always thought about C. Eventually though, her roommate ended up becoming my girlfriend after a few months, and soon after that we lived together. When C came back after a year, she moved in with us. She had a boyfriend now too, but the sexual tension was still there and obvious. Nothing ever happened as we still stayed committed to our respected relationships. After we all moved out, we lost touch for a while, but a year ago C popped up at a bar I was at. We were both single now, so we hooked up a few times. We hung out about 5 times since, each time just hooking up, and it has always been while we are drunk. My question is should I pursue the relationship that we never got the chance to develop all those years ago, or am I misreading this whole situation and it was always just a drunk hook-up that meant nothing? I do really like this girl, and always did. We are good friends and I wouldn't want to ruin that if things went wrong. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted December 19, 2007 Share Posted December 19, 2007 i think you want her cause you are unsure if you could officially 'have' her. i mean, you got in her pants, but mentally you don't meet. she seems too aloof to you. almost like a party girl that a lot of guys want to tame. could it be more? possibly. but only you can make those moves. ask her out to dinner. don't drink. Link to comment
Ahhh Posted December 19, 2007 Author Share Posted December 19, 2007 Last time we hung out, I told her I wanted to take her out to diner after the holidays, and that we weren't allowed to drink. She agreed and said she'd love to. I'm still warry about it though. There are some other reasons I don't want to put myself out there. First, she lives over an hour away. Second, the last guy she was with is still around, they just don't have that BF/GF Title anymore. She never told me what happened between them, but if he can't make her happy how can I? Link to comment
ghost69 Posted December 19, 2007 Share Posted December 19, 2007 you are already making excuses. you have to stop that. you either want to pursue her or you don't. Link to comment
Massari Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 Ahhh I think you should try to see if you can start something with C. But you must know that if you are enjoying what you have with her ( not commitment just sex no strings attached) then you might not be able to do this after if you two didn't work out. It will be awkward after that. So you are going to risk that by making something much more wonderful " A relationship". Now I am not advocating that what you have with her now is necessarily good because you are wondering what if you are something more serious, but nevertheless you have to consider what you might lose and what you might gain. even if what you lose now is good compare to having a relationship with C. Hope I am making sense here! Link to comment
Ahhh Posted December 21, 2007 Author Share Posted December 21, 2007 You guys both touched on some key points. I definatly need to stop making excuses and just put myself out there and see where it goes. And as for what I'd lose and gain......well thats the risk you take. All in all I don't think we would ever lose that friendship. It might not be the same afterwards, but at least I'll know I tried for something more. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted December 21, 2007 Share Posted December 21, 2007 40 years from now you can look back and say, 'you know i should have made a move. if i can only go back.' you want to be that person? Link to comment
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