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IN DENIAL, can't let go.


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after 4 days of not talking to my girlfriend, she finally called. me, being stupid and weak, I persuaded her to come back even though she didn't want to try. she said she loved me, but was no longer girlfriend material. i am graduating college in december and moving out of town. she told me that she knows we won't work out when i leave, but i'm so weak when it comes to her. i told her that it could work, but i think i'm just persuading her to stay. it hurts me more when i know we are officially done, then when we just don't talk or spend time together. i haven't cried so much in my life, and when i think of the two and a half years we spent together it hurts worse.

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Thatboy_e,

 

If you have to convince her to come back and she is not doing it willingly then it will not work for long. I hope I am wrong about that. You have to move on and be strong about it. If she doesn't want you in her life as bf then you have to learn to let go. It is going to be painful as all hell but, you have to give up and move on to bigger and better things.

 

I know this is not the answer you wanted but it is the truth.

 

Hubman

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hubman's right. you can't persuade her into getting back together, she's gotta do it on her own free will. but do you even want to be with her right now? you don't want a girl who you have to convince to be with you. she should be after you. back off and don't talk to her for awhile. she'll start to wonder about you and she'll contact you if she truly cares.

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Sorry, this may sound a bit dumb, but do you feel you're in denial, or that she's in denial.

 

She called you, and she said she still loved you. Why is it that she thinks she's not girlfriend material? Is the real problem you and her, or the fact that you'll be moving away from each other soon and you both feel you need to deal with that issue before it's upon you?

 

I think you may want to discuss with her why you are appearing to break up. Sometimes we have to make tough decisions, if it truly comes down to losing something you both want if you move, you have to weigh it carefully. I'm assuming you have compelling reasons to move.

 

Long distance relationships can work, but they're really, really tough and heartbreaking at times, and I suspect she's trying to protect herself from that, and maybe you are too.

 

At least satisfy yourself you know all the real reasons for your breakup, and see if you're willing to live with them, or it there's another way to avoid being apart if being with her is what you both really want.

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