Help; how do you distinguish interest from friendliness?

[GettingBetter]

I just don't understand women at all. I have no ability to distinguish whether a girl is interested in me, or just being friendly. None. I would almost go as far as to say that my guess is exactly opposite, but then even that's not true.

 

It used to just be a nuisance, but now it's kinda starting to hurt. I'm told after the fact about how I've hurt several girls' feelings, and at the same time I'm hurting my own feelings and confidence, and wasting my time.

 

Honestly, I am at ground zero here. Is there any advice whatsoever you can offer to distinguish interest from friendliness?

 

And if it helps, the context I'm meeting most girls is in class, at work, or at our university's ballroom dance nights. I don't party or go to bars, or anything like that.

[ftheunion]

Neither do I. It seems they are inconsistant, not making eye contact much, seem like they are in a hurry somewhere or just on the go and not having any attention in your direction. It is rediculous. I can't understand it either.

[ghost69]

answer = make a move. if they decline that = non-interest.

[pinkelephant]

lol, i have the same problem but with guys. i can never tell if theyre just friendly or want more.

[ghost69]

^^^you ever speak up? it's most peoples' downfall.

[love4life]

I think people move at different paces and have different levels of "trust". Some people are more reserved at first. I know I like to start off "friendly" because I'm a bit guarded, and keep flirting to a minimum. I've also in the past let the guy do all the pursuing in order to "preserve" myself (trying to change this, though, and be more direct). I think like ghost69 said - make a move. This means: be direct, ask her out, and if she's receptive, there's your answer.

[hello-I-am-me]

I know how you feel,girls are unreadable. There's really only one way to fnd out.

[CaptainPlanet]

Reading women is usually not that hard unless they're very attractive. What it takes is a lot of practive talking to and asking out girls. After a while you just know.

[CaptainPlanet]

I never used to be able to read people at all, but after a lot of practice I have learned and it is a very valuable skill, it is amazing what some people can tell you.

[rs.dallaire]

This means: be direct, ask her out, and if she's receptive, there's your answer.

 

I guess the challenge nowadays is that even if she accepts to go out with you, it might not mean anything. Even a dinner date could just be friendly.

[Brightest Dark]

Sometimes we try to make it hard to distinguish between friendship and interest on purpose (especially if we know the person we're interested in) so we can use it as an excuse if the guy is not interested. Then we don't look so much of an idiot, we say 'I was only being friendly!'

[Ben Bax]

Whats worse, regret or rejection? atleast if you get rejected you know you've tried