nevaeh Posted December 12, 2007 Posted December 12, 2007 ok this is kinda complicated. i had a relationship with a guy that was married. he was separated at the time we met and shortly after he moved in with me and we lived together for six months. he left his wife because he suspected that she was cheating but never had any proof. i broke up with him because he never got a divorce from his wife and she would always call him and he would always talk to her and i felt that he wasn't doing anything to end his marriage with her. after i broke up with him he went back to live with his wife and i was actually happy for him that he was trying to work on his marriage. now i know that his marriage is false and his wife is and has been cheating on him. i want to tell him because he is a really nice guy and i think he deserves better but i don't know if i should be the one to tell him. his wife also knows that i know of her affair and she threatens me alot. should i just stay out of it and mind my own business or should i tell him what i know?
tori_black Posted December 12, 2007 Posted December 12, 2007 Depends on the threats.... Well, the rational thing to do is to shut up and let them work it out. You don't know why she's cheated on him (do you?) and it'd be wrong to judge her, people make mistakes. On the other hand, if you like the guy, it's be fair if he new that his wife isn't being honest with him. What he does after that is his business. This isn't really helping, is it?
TheSmilingTurnip Posted December 12, 2007 Posted December 12, 2007 Tough one. I wouldn't tell him though. If he had his antennae up once before, you know they never went back down. He will figure it out on his own and the information will stick far better than it would coming from you.
shes2smart Posted December 12, 2007 Posted December 12, 2007 Oooooh, way too much drama. I'd sever all ties with both of 'em and stay out of their business from this point forward...mostly just to keep my own life simple, uncomplicated and drama-free as possible.
mrmaximum Posted December 12, 2007 Posted December 12, 2007 Oooooh, way too much drama. I'd sever all ties with both of 'em and stay out of their business from this point forward...mostly just to keep my own life simple, uncomplicated and drama-free as possible. You have a dog in the fight, it may be hard for your xbf to take you at face value. People do make mistakes, having cheated may be a mistake, however, cheating isn't. I would let him know anonymously as he has a right to know that his wife is being unfaithful, we already know that this is a deal breaker for him and she is being unbelivably selfish in continuing to do so. However, the others are right, this relationship and/or outcome has a lot of losers and no winners. Do not stick around, whatever the outcome. Distance yourself from these people and then, if you so choose, drop the news. This soap opera needs to end.
TheSmilingTurnip Posted December 12, 2007 Posted December 12, 2007 Here is the test -- Is it kind? Is it honest? Is it necessary?
Mandyish Posted December 12, 2007 Posted December 12, 2007 Def stay out of it. People have marital problems and that's their business, not anyone else's. He will either figure it out soon enough, or they will work through it. But it's between them.
rs.dallaire Posted January 1, 2008 Posted January 1, 2008 Their situation is none of your business. Stay out of it.
catwalk Posted January 1, 2008 Posted January 1, 2008 tell him, and let him do with the information what he will. Actually I'd get someone else to tell him, since he probably won't believe you! the only reason she is angry with you is probably because she thinks you want him back for yourself....... which hopefully you don't!
Rabican Posted January 2, 2008 Posted January 2, 2008 if she was threatening me, I would tape record that threat, and then give that to the police, and tell the husband. Actually, I would just kick her a!@ for threatening me... but thats not really good advice. I would probably tell just out of spite on her part. Plus if the guy is a decent guy... maybe he does deserve better.
Olive.Juice Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 Oooooh, way too much drama. I'd sever all ties with both of 'em and stay out of their business from this point forward...mostly just to keep my own life simple, uncomplicated and drama-free as possible. I agree with this, also.
Miss Firecracker Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 I think it's very unwise to tell this. Stay as far away from this couple as possible. Let them fix THEIR problems.
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