is this a safe situation? (online dating)

[Konfetkette]

I'm sorry. I know I've been asking a lot of questions about online dating, but I am totally new to this and just want to stay safe.

 

This guy winked at me, and I winked back, and he emailed me.

He said he does not go on match often and gave me his number to call him if I'm interested. Is this safe?

 

I think we need an "Online Dating 101" thread, haha

[Batya33]

Yes- just if you can call from a private number - there is a way to make a landline private - meaning it won't show up on caller ID. I also think it's ok otherwise or you can ask him for his last name and google him before you call him. (the number he gave you likely is a cell so you can't google it the same way you could a land line)

[Diablo7000]

if you block a landline it'll come up as unknown on either home caller id or cell caller id, either way here's how to block a number... dial *67 then the number, just to make sure after u dial *67 it should make the dial tone beep a few times as if u hit the flash button on three-way-calling, then u know it's blocked then u can proceed with the number

[Mythical_Suicide]

u can also block a cell number with *67

[Mysterygirl]

Online dating can be very tricky.

 

If you are not comfortable with handing out phone numbers that quickly, then just let him know you would rather talk on messenger for a bit.

 

Find what is comfortable for you and go from there. Maybe a time line of some sort. Meet on link removed .. exchange emails for 1 day then add to messenger. Talk on messenger for 2 days, then exchange numbers.. talk on the phone for a few days, then meet for coffee or lunch...

 

But also keep in mind that the purpose of online dating is to eventually meet and do offline dating and hopefully fall in love and live happily ever after ...

don't fall into that category of the girl who has 100 guys on his messenger and has only met 2

 

Good Luck

MG

[Konfetkette]

Thanks everyone! I haven't even thought of blocking it. I've never done that.

 

Mysterygirl, yeah I'm not too comfortable giving my number to someone who wrote me a 3 line email.

 

Hmm I doubt I am that girl. I think I'm going out with another guy after my exams are over. He already asked me out and I said that I couldn't because it's exam week, but that I'd be able to afterwards.

[Diablo7000]

no offense but i hate when u girls give us that line, sumtimes it means no and ur just saying maybe next week then again u really are swamped with exams and do want to but ur busy, it makes us have like a 50/50 chance lol

[wiser]

This guy winked at me, and I winked back, and he emailed me. He said he does not go on match often and gave me his number to call him if I'm interested.

 

Nothing wrong with throwing back a few more emails or chatting with the guy on msn or yahoo or aol, before talking on the phone. If he isnt willing to take the time to download and install one of those free chat programs than he isnt worth your time.

[Batya33]

I nver agreed to "chat" before talking on the phone because I found the typing to a stranger irrelevant to figuring out whether it made sense to meet in person. 99% of the men agreed to talk on the phone after one or two emails. The other 1% ended up being on the shady side.

[Konfetkette]

no offense but i hate when u girls give us that line, sumtimes it means no and ur just saying maybe next week then again u really are swamped with exams and do want to but ur busy, it makes us have like a 50/50 chance lol

 

Um we talk over the emails daily. I can't wait to meet him.

What's so bad about having exams as a priority right now?

[just M.E.]

I love emails, IM and txt messages, to me the "literary affair" is a big part of the attraction, how a man writes and his command of language is an attractive feature, but the in person meet must follow with that expectation.

 

But it gives me clues to his ability to express himself

[Konfetkette]

I love emails, IM and txt messages, to me the "literary affair" is a big part of the attraction, how a man writes and his command of language is an attractive feature, but the in person meet must follow with that expectation.

 

But it gives me clues to his ability to express himself

 

so it's ok if I text that other guy I kind of like a text even thought we haven't met yet?

[Batya33]

I love emails, IM and txt messages, to me the "literary affair" is a big part of the attraction, how a man writes and his command of language is an attractive feature, but the in person meet must follow with that expectation.

 

But it gives me clues to his ability to express himself

 

I found most of those clues irrelevant to whether we clicked in real life- but boy did I click with several men through typing, our writing styles, how he expressed himself. I remember for one example of so many, exchanging e-mails with a guy who was so eloquent on insightful on e-mail. We spoke - it was pulling teeth even though he said it was a good time to talk - he spoke in a low passive tone. "Next." Always wondered if he had a ghostwriter but it happened enough times I knew it was just a typical "good e-mail penpal, that's it." If I were looking for e-mail penpals I would have hit the jackpot several times.

 

This is why I wrote in my former profile "I date people not profiles."

 

The e-mails were VERY helpful as far as telling whether he could write intelligently and articulately - so for screening out purposes they were great - but not for "screening in."