Group events -- I need a reality check

[Celadon]

This may sound basic, but do you think there's a generally expected way of interacting when you're at dinner with a group of friends (say, 8-10 friends)?

 

What I mean is ... I'm best relating to people one-on-one, so when I get into a group of people, sometimes I feel out of step 'cause I'm just not as comfortable in that setting. But I want to fit in as best I can, so I want to check this out with you guys. (BTW, this is a group of adults, if that makes any difference.)

 

My take on how people expect you to behave at a fun group dinner:

- lots of joking around

- tease each other

- generally loud

- tell funny stories

- don't bring up serious topics

- don't ask too many questions, just insert your opinions and jokes

- don't talk with only one or two people; address everyone if you can

 

What do you think? Is that about right? Anything else you'd add?

 

I'm serious -- I just want a reality check. Otherwise it's frustrating going into a dinner and feeling like you're not on the same wavelength as others. Thanks!

[rocio]

If there are 10 people sitting at a table, it might be hard for everyone to join in the conversation. You might find it easier to break off and have conversations between 2 or 3 other people. However, let`s say there were about 6 people at one table, then it`s better to engage in the group conversation. I don`t know about not bringing up serious topics. I guess it depends on the general mood of the evening. I also don`t see what`s wrong with asking questions.

[Censored]

I agrre with ambrella, i am also a little akward at large dinners. Break the table down into segments. You can't talk to everyone at once. Ummmm, as for topics, maybe stay clear of the typical 3, sex, religion and politics.

[Celadon]

Thanks for the replies! You're right, it does depend on the vibe of the group a bit.

 

I guess when I said "don't ask too many questions" I meant that, for myself, I do that when I'm interested in getting to know someone, and the conversation is more thoughtful and serious. I've found myself "out of step" before when asking questions, but everyone else is just chiming in. Like, asking questions is "linear" but group conversations tend to be more random, you know?