I can't do this anymore....

[nottingham28]

So i have just had an emotional break down, and i can't understand it. It's been almost 5 months since my ex broke up with me. I guess i haven't helped myself by carrying on seeing her since we broke up. It came to the point where i thought that maybe things were back on... i had to ask her what the situation was as i couldn't bare not knowing. I am actually so upset. On friday night i went to her sisters 21st birthday party, and she was there, we both got really drunk, she was dancing and being all friendly with this other guy, holding hands etc, and i'm thinking how could she be so heartless. So i went up to her and said thanks for doing this right in front of my face... she then called my a psycho and claimed that i had ruined her night by getting jealous. Now... if you read my previous posts you will understand more about the situation. I go travelling on Jan 11th for 3 months and i see this as my opportunity to get over her... she leaves feb 3rd for 5 months, so i won't see her for 6 months... but guys i feel like i actually can't bare to not see her, and i've made the decision to see her until i go...i am just finding it all so hard. I can't believe that after this long i am still hurting so much, and when she looks at me and says harsh stuff to me, she looks so hurtfully, and it makes me think how can someone who had something so special look at me like that... i really don't know what to do, i'm so lost, and it's all i ever think about... i just hope she realises what she is missing out on when i'm gone... i just feel like i need people to speak to etc, my friends have been great... but i just can't get over this girl, it's literally all i think about and it breaks my heart... when we are together we act just like a normal couple... it's all so weird and i don't know what to do anymore..... but i just know i can't let go of her and not see her, until i go travelling when i actually have to let go and not see her.....

[ILJ02d]

Its normal to want to feel this way. You just have to know that yes you can see her but if she is making no mention of wanting to get back together, you have to find a way to start dealing with that. The sooner the better. Its not fair of her to act like you guys are a couple if that is not where her heart is.

 

Have you tried talking to her about where you guys are at or if she even wants to reconcile?

[nottingham28]

Yes i have, we had that conversation about 2 weeks ago, she told me that she doesn't want to be in a relationship for when she goes travelling and to university, i then told her that i need to make a decision as to whether i see her before i go away travelling, so we have decided to carry on seeing each other until i go away , so it's all the more harder for me, i can't get over her whilst i am still seeing her, but i just need to make the impossible decision of whether i should contact her whilst i am away... or whether we should just completely leave it then....