Why do people seem to like him more?

[robinhood]

Hey guys, this post has some jealousy in it but i'll try to keep it to a minimum. My friend and I went to different high schools but knew each other from other activities. We pretty much went through school with the same grades (the best possible grades through 5th and 6th yr). Now, we both successfully got into our desired course, medicine. It's a lot of work so I don't want any other sorts of pressure.

 

He talks a lot and laughs really loudly. Personally, I think he's quite a funny guy and knows when to become serious. It's not hard for me to make friends, but our common friends seem more attached to him for some reason. Although it might be self-explanatory to you guys, I still don't understand, can anyone help me decipher the difference between me and him?

 

We both HATE night life i.e. drinking,

We're both kinda smart ( he's a bit smarter than me, I'd say coz he works much more.) He deserves it.

I'm better at everything that is co-curricular coz I spend more time on games, sports etc.

[Lucy_lou]

c'mon, we need much more description than this. I'd love to pick you two apart, and tell you why he's mr magnet.

[Timebandit]

c'mon, we need much more description than this.

 

I tend to agree. Without more information we can only give some very generic and vague answers.

[Lana0120]

The info is vague, but from what you're saying, it sounds like he's more outgoing and confident in himself (at least the the world at large anyway). The fact that you're posting on here, means that you have some insecurities and maybe other people pick up on those things.

[Celadon]

Well, I understand how you feel. Sometimes it's baffling why one person is more popular than another.

 

Some things I've learned:

- People like people who make them laugh or are entertaining. Life's got enough problems. They need to be happy. Plus, it's easier to be with someone entertaining because then all you have to do is sit back and enjoy.

- People like people who they feel safe with. The person whose behavior is consistent draws more people than the person who is moody (thus making people unsure of what kind of reaction they will receive).

- People may wrongly assume that a happy, outgoing person has it all together, thus they admire him or her.

- People like people who have opinions (but not too extreme or fanatic). While a good friend may be the person who listens, the more popular person will have interesting things to say.

- Quieter people may be at a disadvantage socially because people will assume things about them. But a more communicative person will tell more about himself or herself, and thus clearly show who he/she is.

 

From the above statements, take or leave whatever applies to your friend. What can I say? In the end, some people are just born with more charisma than most other people. But at least, there are skills you can develop to be the best that YOU are.

[Lucy_lou]

well I was comparing myself to a guy I know at Uni recently, and he has about a bijillion more friends than me, and though we're different, I think we're probably on a similar level of coolness, intelligence, interestingness, and niceness. But the difference is that he's not afraid to ask people for help. He's always putting himself in the kind of submissive role of asking people questions. (He's from overseas, so he gets to play on that a bit), but I've noticed that a lot of people (myself included) tend to warm to someone who asks for help on any random topic (e.g. do you know where the law building is? or do you know when the final assessment is... etc. ) sometimes it's people who give others an opportunity to feel good about themselves (e.g. by being helfpul) that win the friends. While independent people like me who have too much pride, and don't want to look weak end up with none.

[tmp0620]

From the little info you gave I'd say he puts himself out more and is more approachable... nothing wrong with you... you may just be a bit more reserved. Does that sound right?