My brother is an abuser (I would want to report him)

[cripplechild]

I'm at lost and don't know what to do about my brother who I have cut contact (he disgusts me). Two months ago I found out that he has been both physically and verbally abusive to his g/f. The way I discovered this is when I one day went to my brother's house just to talk and the girl answers the door. To my shock she had a bruise on her cheek. We have been in contact since and I have persuaded her to press charges but turns out later on she dropped them.

Worst is how she keeps defending him saying how torn up he is and how she yet loves him.

I'm consider one of my hardest choice which is to report my own brother. Yes it's my blood but I hate it when it comes to hitting women (I detest those men). If she doesn't press charges then I'll do myself.

 

I have no clue why my brother turn up this way (don't think he was like this before). We were both brought up in a stable home and raise on not hitting girls.

[ostego]

The woman beater obviously isnt the brother you grew up with. Do you want your Neices and Nephews (if ever!) to grow up in a house of violence?

 

NO! Put a stop to it! The abuser may be your brother, but think about th longer effects and suffering that will be caused if you don't take action, and get him corrected, at which point he'll probably live a better happier life after he learns to control his rage.

 

I would advise that you sort this out. Don't let people suffer unheard

[LostInMyThoughts]

Stay out of it.

 

It's between your brother and this woman.

 

If you report him, the police will investigate, and they will ask this woman, and she will deny it.

 

Then, in all likelihood, he'll just end up hurting her more.

 

Until she is ready to be done with him, there is nothing that can be done.

 

Youre better off focusing on trying to get your brother help.

[southerngirl]

If you have no proof of a current crime in progress then there is little or nothing that can be done.

 

You will look like your the one that needs the help.

 

She will stop talking to you.

 

He will hate you.

 

Do you have any family to confide in?

 

I say get closer to her, be her friend.... help in that way. See if you can gain her trust to be the one person shes going to run to.

 

Then IF there is a crime in progress THEN you would report, not before. Even knowing it is going on must be horrible.

 

I agree that he needs help. They both do.

[HappyAsALark]

It is not going to matter if you report him if he did not physically touch you and the girl that he is abusing is not willing to come forward. Maybe talk to your parents if they are in both of your lives. Talk to someone close to him that could possibly get through to him. Seek out an abuse counselor that the girl could possibly go to.

[SW]

Checkout this site, it'll help you understnd whats going on and you'll see theres not a whole lot you can do. until shes ready to admit it.

 

link removed

[alcide]

You should if you like him you'll get him help. Your discision is perfect because it could reach as far as he bitting her so bad to die and then you will say if you knew.

 

The same way if you had a sister some man was hitting on you wouldn't like it so help the lady out.

[Freckles]

I read about this news story that may be helpful

 

This man started to beat up his new wife

 

She beat him up bad

 

He tried agan

 

She went off on him and sent him to the hospital

 

If a woman has backbone, sometimes the abuser , gets it instead

 

 

 

P.S.

I think they divorced, because he was wanting a woman that would take it

 

Instead of * * * * for Tat reaction she gave him