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My gf is going to be in a nude love scene


bender
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....and I don't know how to handle it. I've expressed my concerns to my girlfriend about this while remaining supportive. However, deep down inside I can't dodge these fears of betrayal and feelings of jealousy I know to be irrational. I hate feeling this way and I don't know what to do! I love my girlfriend very much. We've been together for 6 years and although I always knew a situation like this could come up, I have no idea how to take it. Please, if anybody has any experience with this type of thing, please help. Of course any and all advice is greatley appreciated.

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Hi Bender !

 

I have come accross this before.

 

This is how I see it. She is the sort of girl that has absolutely no problem with this. She believes that it is completely professional, and that is it. You objecting to this gets a response that belittles you and makes you feel like you are the one with the problem.

 

In a way, you do have the problem, because it is quite likely that she will do this regardless of your objections. Underneath this all, is a bigger question.

 

Have you considered this attitude difference and the role it has played, plays and may well play in the future? This could come up again, and might well should you both be together after this scene.

 

I ask you this. I had to decide that I am not the sort of person that could be comfortable with a partner that did love scenes with somebody else. It bothers me, and that is the long and short of it. Are you the sort of guy that can get your head around this? If not, you should really look at your 6 year relationship, and figure out if this will happen again in the future.

 

Hope this helps you some,

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well...*just wondering*...is your girl in the adult film industry???...I don't believe in cheating...but I always have more than one women...not intimate with them...but like a companion I can talk with...something I can fall back on...almost like a plan B...and C...D...E...get it buddy...

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Goofy,

 

SHe is not in the adult film industry. The film in question is an independent short. It is her first love scene.

 

Charmed,

 

My girlfriend actually does respect my objections to this and is currently trying to lobby the director to cut out the nudity. However, since she is more or less looking for exposure, she has resigned to going through with it if the director indicates that there is no way around it. We are both conflicted with this whole situation.

 

As for getting beyond this, I'm not sure if I can. I have thought about the possibilities of something like this happening and in all honesty would rather she not do love scenes. However, I respect my girlfriend too much than to "forbid" her.

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Bender,

 

Of course forbidding her is out of the question !

 

However, should she want to do this, you have to consider your position. If you don't, it could take effect on your relationship in the future.

 

I had a conversation with an girl in the past few months. She is trying to make her break in the industry. Her dad and I were questioning her as to why she felt that she needed to take a lapdancing part in a short film for her career. She thought it was better than nothing. In the end, she didn't get a part, but she would have taken it even though it would have been very unlikely she would have gotten her big break from it.

 

My point is that this issue will always come up with couples where one or other is trying to become an actor. To be an actor, one must get into character and this character may be very different to what they are in life.

 

You Bender need to look at what you want. You should not continue into a situation where you are not happy and this eats at you. However, you also know that you can not forbid her to do this. This part is only one part, and even if she does not do this part, she may get other similar parts in the future and this will show it's head again.

 

You really need to get this sorted out now once and for all, and avoiding the part is not the answer. Will she be in a position to avoid all love scenes for the rest of her career?

 

~

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