struggling

[bobsiesprincess]

i guess im just looking 4 a bit of support 2day, cos im finding im going downhill again.

 

basically, my friends have REALLY let me down, and not been there 4 me like they said they would. im in practically all the time. this was fine at first, cos i didnt enjoy being out. but now, im getting to the stage that I just want to go out and have fun. but i have no1 to do it with. i try calling and texting ppl and so on but i guess theyre all too wrapped up in their own lives to bother with me. i have never felt so lonely in my entire life. i feel like a complete loser. i know im not gonae meet ne1 else cooped up in my room.........but i just duno what to do about it. i tried starting yoga to meet new people, but theyre all alot older than me and married etc. i dont know how to go about making new friends, my confidence is so low i just dont know if i can.

 

i just feel like if i had a group of single friends to go out with this would be so much easier to get over.

 

even if i do meet sum1 ese one day, theyre gonae run a mile when they work out i have no friends.

 

im 21 i should be out having the time of my life.

 

sorry 4 the moan, i guess i just needed to let it out.

[lost_for_words]

I know exactly how you feel (see my thread 'seriously need help').

 

I'm not in a position to offer advice but wanted you to know that you're NOT alone on here, I am exactly where you are now. My friends are mostly married, have kids, or are too busy with their own lives one way or another.

 

Its also hard at this time of year, everyone is planning for Christmas, when all we want to do is curl up in a corner and cry. And the dark evenings (I'm in England, noticed you're up north) they don't help, because a walk in the sunshine would really help me just now.

 

I've even thought about a week in the sun on my own somewhere, but am I really brave enough to do that alone? I don't think so.

 

As I say, you're not alone in the way you feel right now, so stick around here. Its been a great help to me in some ways.

[bobsiesprincess]

thanks for the reply lost for words.

 

ur so right, this time of the year is the worst for a broken heart. im SO dreading christmas and new year. all i can think of is the nice things me and the ex did at this time of the year.

 

u shld do the week in the sun! i would love to just cant afford it. if ur not brave enough to do it completely alone, theres those websites that organise singles holidays so there would be lots of people in the exact same position.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

I think a lot of people are in your shoes. There are those who have tons of "friends" and are always going out and invited here, there and everywhere...but they are not really solid friends...they are just people to hang out with and have a laugh. I have friends who I see from time to time but we have different interests and are caught up in our own lives so we don't see each other a lot. Soon after I moved back to my hometown, I made a group of friends and always had somebody to socialize with...but they weren't true friends...they were users...and those "friendships" eventually ended when I had enough of the BS. Honestly, I am happier alone than dealing with the BS. The people I don't see that often, I have been friends with for many many years, and those I count as my true friends as they have been there for me during the bad times.

[RedBranchKnight]

Hey bobsies. I know exactly how you feel.

 

Im in my early 20's too and should be out havin the time of my life and great craic and meeting new people. My friends havnt really been there for me after my break up either, and I broke a bone in my foot the other day so now I cant do much at all for 4-6 weeks since I need crutches and no bar or club will let me in with them

 

Was out a few times last week and met some new people and a cuple of girls but since then Iv felt like utter rubbish because I just keep thinking how much better looking my ex was, how I could have so much fun with her and talk about anything and the weird thing was I felt really guilty that I was talking with other girls, like I was betraying her or something.... so damn lousy. I actually want to do something idiotic right now, have a text conversation with her hoping it will alleviate things somewhat, but it wont.

 

Keep the chin up and just fight through it, remember that 'night is darkest just before dawn' and all that and just try to get out there and stay busy. Thats what Im doing, isnt fun but what else can we do? Good luck

[dan39]

Hey

 

I feel quite the same as this. I feel like everyone's having fun going out, mingling, socialising, have a laugh and all that. I've outgrown my friends. We're not the same anymore. I would love some friends who are like what I've become like. But commuting to uni like you do, it's really hard to get in with people. It seems hard to be able to meet people, I don't know where to begin. And like you I'm not sure I have the confidence. Life seems to be slipping away and sometimes I feel quite lonely.

 

Sorry I haven't helped you whatsoever, I just thought I'd add I feel the same. Where do people meet friends these days?

[bobsiesprincess]

thanks for replying every1, means alot!!

 

sorry to hear some of u r feeling the same. ive been thinking alot about it the last few days, and i hope that once were healed, and our confidence is back, we will attract new friends naturally.

 

fingers crossed.

 

but god knows where ppl meet friends dan?! its a really crap age to be in this situation, because were in uni 4 a while longer n our situations wont change to allow us to meet ne ppl if u know what i mean. its easy to make new friends wen u go somewhere completely new.