Aaron20b Posted November 29, 2007 Share Posted November 29, 2007 It seem I never get the girl I want. Whenever I try I just get hurt more because they don't really respond to me much and probably wouldn't give a damn if I exist or not. Why can't I ever get the girl I want? Why does it hurt me so much to not have her? Why do I get so hurt when I get rejected? I wish I was strong, I really wish but I seem to make a big deal out of everything little thing. for example, if I message this girl on myspace and she doesn't get back to me right away even though she is online, I freak out. I really need help because I can't seem to help getting hurt by these little things. What do you guys suggest? Link to comment
JadedStar Posted November 29, 2007 Share Posted November 29, 2007 Evilken I think your issue is you get way too attached to the girls you chat iwth on myspace and you set up all of these huge expectations, and if they don't feel the same it is such a huge letdown. I know you have met some girls offline too that worked out in the beginning then fizzled out. The best thing you could do would try very very hard not to get attached so quickly. Most people don't get attached until quite a few dates - you seem to grab on pretty quickly and that is going to lead to a lot of disappointment. Try real hard to take it slower as far as feeling attached to a girl. Wait and give it time for something real to blossom. Link to comment
Aaron20b Posted November 29, 2007 Author Share Posted November 29, 2007 But if the girl has liked you at first but than stop that really gets to me!.... It's like.....uhh...whats a good example...ah. It's like being a little kid and you started playing this video game you really really liked than it broke and you can't play it again. Evilken I think your issue is you get way too attached to the girls you chat iwth on myspace and you set up all of these huge expectations, and if they don't feel the same it is such a huge letdown. I know you have met some girls offline too that worked out in the beginning then fizzled out. The best thing you could do would try very very hard not to get attached so quickly. Most people don't get attached until quite a few dates - you seem to grab on pretty quickly and that is going to lead to a lot of disappointment. Try real hard to take it slower as far as feeling attached to a girl. Wait and give it time for something real to blossom. Link to comment
JadedStar Posted November 29, 2007 Share Posted November 29, 2007 Your little kid video game analogy is a very good one evilken. That is because you are still a bit immature a bit in the area of relationships....that is not said to make you feel bad it happens to many young people, and since they say guys mature at a slower rate sometimes it plagues them a bit longer.... The thing is you HAVE to realize that any relationship is entered into and exited upon free will. These girls don't have to have a real reason why it fizzled out - for some reason it just did. This happens. All the more reason you HAVE to stop getting attached to them after just a few dates. That is way way way too soon for either of you to know if you really truly like each other a lot or not. Those first few dates are just the getting to know each other period. If you allow yourself to get your hopes up very high during this timeframe it will lead to a lot of letdown, as it has been. Link to comment
happily married Posted November 29, 2007 Share Posted November 29, 2007 It seem I never get the girl I want. Whenever I try I just get hurt more because they don't really respond to me much and probably wouldn't give a damn if I exist or not. Why can't I ever get the girl I want? Why does it hurt me so much to not have her? Why do I get so hurt when I get rejected? I wish I was strong, I really wish but I seem to make a big deal out of everything little thing. for example, if I message this girl on myspace and she doesn't get back to me right away even though she is online, I freak out. I really need help because I can't seem to help getting hurt by these little things. What do you guys suggest? I have a feeling you're getting attached way too quickly and this is leading to all of your pain. Try to not rush in relationships and just simply wait for the girl who will be around your corner. Link to comment
Need_some_help Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 Ken, Have you made an appointment with a therapist yet? You can find a good one in your local yellow pages, or ask your family doctor for a referral. You NEED to make this appointment as soon as possible Link to comment
Aaron20b Posted November 30, 2007 Author Share Posted November 30, 2007 Ken, Have you made an appointment with a therapist yet? You can find a good one in your local yellow pages, or ask your family doctor for a referral. You NEED to make this appointment as soon as possible *sigh* no, I just haven't been up to it, its like a long process to set it up apprantly Link to comment
Sweet Buttabean Jellayroll Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 beacuse you let it hurt you so much, and your not even in love your attracted..........unless you meant finding love then yes im quite sure it could hurt. and you have a huge attachment problem........ Link to comment
CaptainPlanet Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 The bit that makes me angry. You know those childish feelings you get for someone ? well for some people those feelings turn into reality. The person they like, likes them back. That must be something. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted November 30, 2007 Share Posted November 30, 2007 yeah, well when that video game you like breaks, you find another one to play. not saying to play women or anything. but bro, get off the computer already. getting sick of reading the same thing over and over. Link to comment
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