yeah, yeah

[redbulladdict]

I really like this girl who I'm almost 100% sure has a girlfriend. She was my first same sex crush, and to this day the only girl I'm attracted to. How do I get over her? We get a long so well and I really want to be friends, but I'm afraid that if I try to just be a friend now, I'll just like her more, because we just get a long way to freakin' well. Ah...it's just like, I've finally admitted to myself that I have feelings for a girl, but I can't act upon it, or even try to come to some resolution about it, because she's in love with someone.

[Zackinlaw]

Do you ever have attraction for guys? I'm only asking because it's not clear whether you are lesbian or bisexual.

 

Zack.

[redbulladdict]

I've always liked guys in the past, she's the first girl.

[whathappensnext]

Ok dear ur first same sex crush is always the hardest.well for me anyway.friendship brings alot of people closer.and it does make it harder more so if u cant have what u want.and if u do ever have it its real hard to let go.

[redbulladdict]

I mean we're both at different colleges, so it's not like I see her a lot. I have to go out of my way to initiate contact. But like, I really don't want to give her up as a friend you know?

[tomo]

Have you asked her weather she has a girlfriend? Ican understand that you want stay friends with her you just want to be close to her arrrrr thats cute can relate to that. Does she come an see you? Is she alone when she sees you.Does she keep incontact with you. What is it about this girl that attracted you to her?" Does she know how you feel about her? lol

[redbulladdict]

She's definitely dating that girl, it's not exactly obvious, but looking closely it's pretty evident. It's more then I just want to be close to her...she really helped me through some hard times last year, she might not know it, basically we had class together senior year, didn't hang out outside of it, but she was the only one that would tell me the truth about certain things going on and she was the only one to call me on my crap. But I guess I do want to be close to her, she just makes me really happy. We went to dinner a while back, (see a previous post) and I was just in an amazing mood after...ahhhh...she came up to visit her gf, she had dinner with me on a saturday night...you can see all of this in my first post. work, etc. after she visited me at work with her gf, she hasn't responded to me. I've messaged once, txted 2 times-->once about hanging out over thanksgiving. All of that over about a month, not over the top. I can only assume her gf, doesn't want her to talk to me...because we're definitely friends and she's never not tlaked to me before. I think she has a clue how i feel, but not exactly, she was definitely tring to figure something out that night, because she asked me about guys so many times. Honestly...I don't know why I like her, I just kinda do. Basically I need to take motions to move on, figure something out...something. Whenever I think about it, I just get angry or sad and I have enough going on in my life to have something as frusterating at this.

[tomo]

Well it seems the night you had dinner your friend was searching for her own answers on how she feels about you,possiblly she could be having troubles of her own.How was the g/F reactions to you when you met her?

Do you think that her and her g/f are suited to eachother?

If you think that you have given it your best shot at telling her how you really feel about her without any doubt then I say move on with your life, maybe one day she will seek you out. Be happy do what makes you happy. Good luck

[redbulladdict]

Her reaction was really just neutral, friendly, but that's just the type of person she is. The second time I met her, I was reintroduced and all, along with all the other people. she just kind of smiled politely...

 

Really they seem good together. I know they've been at least good friends for a while (at least over two years)..honestly, I don't know much about the other girl. And it's speculative, I could be completely wrong about them dating, not much pda when i've randomly run into them, but I have a feeling.

 

I haven't told her anything about how I feel. Should I? Or should I just try to be friends? Or just walk away completely...

[tomo]

Well the only way to find out if they are an item is to ask her,make a date for dinner with her an talk to her about how you feel about her,an if she says she is in a relationship,say thats ok,hope we can stay friends,if she say no then wish her the best an if her relationship doesnt work out,tell her to look you up an walk away.Just tell her how you feel an go from there everthing will fall into place when you talk to her,how you do it is up to you. Got me fingers crossed for you,keep us updated. lol

[redbulladdict]

Are you sure? If I pretty much am certain that she's in a relationship, it just doesn't seem beneficial to tell her. I don't want to mess anything up for her, or mess with her mind.

[tomo]

can relate to that leave as is an be happy maybe one day you will end up together good luck.

[lukeb]

It sounds like you barely know her, you barely talk, she might barely know you exist and you are obsessing about her. You don't know I take it if she is bi or lesbian, you don't know if she has a gf but you think she might. Sorry but this all sounds very highschool to me.

[redbulladdict]

I do know her. We used to talk a lot, but we fell out of contact for a couple of months. She does know I exist, we're friends. I'm pretty sure she is a lesbian, like if i'm wrong it'll be a shock. I'm also very sure she has a girlfriend, so I'm not going to do or say anything. I came on this thread looking for a way to get over her, and I'm not obsessing in my everyday life, but on this board, it's pretty much what I have to talk about. If your comment had a point, for example, just move on. Then it would be called for, but with what you wrote I just feel like you're judging.

[lukeb]

Move on from what? There is nothing to move on from is basically my point. It is entirely possible she is not even a lesbian, you don't know. It is entirely possible she is not in a relationship but they are simply roommates or whatever. It is very likely she has no clue you have romantic feelings for her, or at least thought about exploring that.

 

The relationship hasn't progressed to any kind of a stage except some assumptions that only you have in your head. Assumptions you are pretty sure about, well almost, well almost 100%, very surprised if it wasn't true, almost completely 100%, very very almost completely very very almost sure, I think she has a clue how I feel but not exactly, well almost exactly, I assuming the gf doesn't want to talk to me, well I am almost sure, oh yeah she asked me about guys she must be very curious to find out if I am gay or not, well I am almost sure.................

[redbulladdict]

she is gay and that girl is her girlfriend, is that better? it's not all in my head and it's not all based on assumptions. i've thought this through. a couple of those things were speculative, but not the majority of them. i also never said she wanted to know if i was gay because she asked me about guys, it's just that it really did come up more then it would usually in a normal conversation. we're hanging out as friends now, and that's all i want. i got over it by thinking the whole situation through. but i mean, that's really not a big deal, because my first same sex crush is really just "nothing" anyways.