nottingham28 Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 Well after a 2 year relationship, me and my ex broke up, we have been seeing each other for a few months, but have come to the decision that come January we should call it off, i love this girl to bits but she doesn't want a relationship anymore. We are both going travelling i leave in Jan, she leaves in feb. we won't see each other for 6 months, so she thinks that we are better off apart. I honestly thought that she was the one for me and i feel like i won't find anyone better, i will continue to see her until january, but feel like i just don't want to get back in to a relationship with anybody, me and her are soul mates, we get on so well, i just can't understand why she doesn't want a relationship any more. Do read my previous posts to see the situation. I'm hurting right now..... Link to comment
Iwantittoend Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 I'm in a very similar situation. My ex is leaving for the army in January for 5 months. These past 2 months, we've grown closer than ever and even hold hands, cuddle, and other things bf/gf do. But, she doesn't want to commit to a relationship because she'll be gone. I know she's my soul mate. It's just a feeling I have when I'm around her. We get along so great and understand each other inside and out. It's a relationship I've never had in my life. It just sucks that she has to go. Link to comment
beauty21 Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 You need to get out of this way of thinking. It's not about finding someone better, it's about finding someone that loves you enough to still be committed even while being apart for 6 months. Link to comment
MushroomGod Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 Well she probably doesn't want to feel guilty if she meets someone when she is away. Stay with her until she leaves then I would keep minimal contact. Don't fight with her or argue about stupid things. I will also say that I felt the same way as you at one time in my life and I didn't think I would find someone better. But I did and you will too. I also broke up with the better girl and know I will find someone even better than her. You're young Brutha and it takes time to heal but you'll get over this one and find a girl who is even better. Trust me. Link to comment
MushroomGod Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 You need to get out of this way of thinking. It's not about finding someone better, it's about finding someone that loves you enough to still be committed even while being apart for 6 months. yea thats the definition of better. Link to comment
nottingham28 Posted November 27, 2007 Author Share Posted November 27, 2007 I know that i must let her go, but just feel that it's such as waste as we had something so special together a knew each other inside out..., she obviously does not have enough love to last the 6 months and your right about her not wanting to feel guilty, but come January is this the end?, should i just never contact her again, will i never see this girl again when i say goodbye to her? i am dreading that moment so so much.... Link to comment
MushroomGod Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 Man be with her until she leaves. Say Good-Bye, I love you, You'll miss her, and everything else. You guys are young and have the world ahead of you. End things on good terms and maybe fate will bring you 2 back together. Link to comment
MushroomGod Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 BTW when she leaves come here for support, I for one will be there for ya kid I know what you're going through and I got threw it so I'll make sure you do too. Link to comment
nottingham28 Posted November 27, 2007 Author Share Posted November 27, 2007 That's awesome man, thanks so much , i just feel so confused right now, things were going great, then we hit this massive transition, with travelling and university, and then it all falls apart, everything about this girl is great, apart from the fact that she doesn't want to be with me... it's a rubbish feeling, but i have accepted it and i strangely understand where she is coming from, i am going travelling with my best friend , so it'll be good to have support from him, but i have the internet where i am going and i'll be sure to post on here for support, i know i'm going to leave it, it hurts me to just think about saying good bye , so who knows what it's going to be like when she goes, i just want things to end on such a good note, and for things to be great up until then.... then i will let go , when i have to let go.... when i leave... Link to comment
programmer Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 Well she probably doesn't want to feel guilty if she meets someone when she is away. Stay with her until she leaves then I would keep minimal contact. Don't fight with her or argue about stupid things. I will also say that I felt the same way as you at one time in my life and I didn't think I would find someone better. But I did and you will too. I also broke up with the better girl and know I will find someone even better than her. You're young Brutha and it takes time to heal but you'll get over this one and find a girl who is even better. Trust me. It is no gurantee that he will find someone better. It is ofcourse possible, but never count on it. He should do whatever it takes and whatever that may be to make it work, when he believes that he cannot get anything better than this. I truly believe that I can never ever love anyone as much as I have done with my ex. I know that I can love someone else, but never as much. That is why it is so out-of-word painful to go through this moment. When you have emptied your whole heart, soul, mind and body for her. I don't think I will do that to another person ever again. Link to comment
nottingham28 Posted November 27, 2007 Author Share Posted November 27, 2007 This is how i am feeling, emotionally drained, the thought of being with anyone else makes me feel sick, i have tried so hard to show this girl how great it could be and how great it was, but her mind is made up, i want to be with her and i love her, she loves me, but doesn't want to be with me, thats the hardest thing in the world to deal with... especially when your told during the relationship that they will never ever ever finish things, she always told me, why would i want to lose you, when i've wanted you for so long, well now she has lost me, under her own decision, and there's nothing i can do about it, it pains me no end, and i am drained... i just don't know how i can say goodbye to this girl, i literally gave everything for her... and it's coming to an end... Link to comment
programmer Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 But you have that I don't have, is your age. You can still find somebody that is fresh and still have all the properties that is possible for a girl. You are still so so young. So I will say that your chances for finding someone better is way way higher than myself and many others here. Just ask me if you didn't fully understand what I'm trying to imply. Link to comment
nottingham28 Posted November 27, 2007 Author Share Posted November 27, 2007 Sure, but i just feel like i don't want anyone else, but i'm going to have to let go, i'm just very confused right now, i don't know whether i should stay in contact whilst travelling or what... it has all just been so unexpected... Link to comment
MushroomGod Posted November 28, 2007 Share Posted November 28, 2007 Sure, but i just feel like i don't want anyone else, but i'm going to have to let go, i'm just very confused right now, i don't know whether i should stay in contact whilst travelling or what... it has all just been so unexpected... Thats a tough one. I say minimal contact, once a week month so forth w/o asking about the relationship or who she is with. Link to comment
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