confused_with_girls Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 WARNING this post is VERY long. Sorry. A million thank yous if you read it all! I’d prefer a girl’s perspective on this but any responses would be great. The Question: what do you think, if anything, was the girl thinking? Setting the Scene: I don’t have too much experience with girls so any comments would be great. I went to a friend’s party last weekend. There wasn’t too many people but there was one very attractive girl. I didn’t really create much of a chance to talk to her properly but of the quick exchanges (sorry, crap word) I had with her, I thought she was friendly and fun. After a bit of alcohol we all went out to a club. As we were leaving, and bearing in mind everyone was quite tipsy by this point but not very drunk, she said to me: “you have a good body”. On the looks scale she is very good looking and I am probably around average (I think; maybe even a bit below average, I don’t really know) but I suppose I have an ‘athletic’ build because I like sports and stuff. By this stage she had seen me dancing (badly!) with a few others in the room so she could see that I wasn’t too introverted. We got to the club and started queuing. There was around 8 of us but I was standing next to her and another member of the party. The others were still with us but really talking amongst themselves. To pass time I started ‘eye spy with my little eye’. I know, I’m a moron(!); I’d probably play it even if not tipsy! And I keep saying ‘tipsy’ because I wasn’t that drunk and I don’t think anyone was actually very drunk but definitely affected by alcohol. So, again, I didn’t really have a conversation with her but was kind of having fun with her/ around her. At one point, I think I put my arm around her waist briefly. I think that was my best attempt at flirting! The queue was too long so we decided to go back home for some more drinks. Now I don’t know how this happened exactly but me and her ended up holding hands. I can still remember the exact moment we started holding hands because we were initially going to hold hands normally – cupped hands – but I think we kind of mutually immediately changed the position by interlocking hands. It was a very nice feeling indeed. We were walking to the bus stop or taxi stop and she kept complaining about her high heels hurting her feet. I said: “I could give you a piggyback”. In hindsight it was a silly thing to say because she was wearing quite a short skirt, but I do have a tendency of saying silly things! I can’t really remember what kind of tone of voice I used: I think it was a mixture of playful and serious. She replied, “you can’t, I’m taller than you!”. OK, in high heels she was taller than me – but by not very much! If she took her heels off, I’d be taller! I didn’t say anything but felt a little hurt although I certainly didn’t express that feeling. For some reason, and I can’t remember too well, but we said exactly the same to each other only a few minutes later. Me offering her a piggyback when she complained about her feet, and her saying she’s taller than me. Eventually we got a taxi and all our group piled in (a few people had left). Again, I don’t really remember how it happened, but I think we somehow mutually reached for each other’s hands and held hands all the way home (10 minutes) in a interlocking hold. I remember feeling how lucky I was. We got back to the house where the party was. There were only a few of us now and we just sat on chairs and talked in a group. I don’t think I got to do too much talking because the girls who were there all knew each other and were talking about their jobs mainly, although addressing everyone. I think I chimed in a few times and asked a few questions. There was no opportunity to talk to the girl individually. Incidentally, out of all the boys left, I was the only straight one! I hope she knew that! Eventually I had to leave with my friend. The host hugged us good bye but the girl remained seated and just said “it was nice to meet you”. I don’t think there’s going to be much chance to see her again – certainly not soon. I can’t help thinking I should have made more of the evening by at least talking to her properly early on in the evening. At the same time I think, well she’s attractive, I’m the only one giving her some sort of male attention, and she liked the attention but nothing more. Could I have read anything into any of these signals so I know for the future? I am hopeless around girls! Thank you so much for any comments! Link to comment
Honey Pumpkin Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 She fancied you - get her number and give her a ring and ask her out. Link to comment
servedcold Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 If a woman ever says "you have a nice body," it means she has thought of you sexually. Ask her out sooner rather than later. Don't worry about being self-conscious or saying the right thing, just have fun, joke and laugh. If she touches you on the date, handholding and such, get her alone and kiss her right then. Don't wait. Link to comment
Lana0120 Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 Yeah, she was interested. You just needed to ask her out or for her number or something. Link to comment
scotty77 Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 She sounds interested.Some women are natural touchers who will touch everyone ;a tap on the shoulder,that sort of thing but I don't think most women would hold hands with someone they just met unless they were interested. Link to comment
Dating Coach Posted November 27, 2007 Share Posted November 27, 2007 I think you passed up many opportunities. Starting with the piggyback ride. Not by saying it-I actually think it was a great suggestion!-but by not persisting with it. You backed down at the first hurdle. Don't do that. The second was back at the party. You should have pulled her up to dance or something like that. Then you could have danced with your arms around her waist/back and said a few nice words and got the kiss. The third was asking for her phone number when you had to leave. I don't think it's blown, but you need to be FAR more proactive in getting something moving. Link to comment
confused_with_girls Posted November 28, 2007 Author Share Posted November 28, 2007 I guess not being very savvy around girls I missed some opportunities that someone a bit cleverer might have spotted. Thank you very much to everyone for replying to my post. I appreciate it! I had a fun night and wish I had asked for her telephone number despite how awkward it could have been, especially with other people she knew around. I don't think I'm going to have another chance to see her again, and knowing my luck she'll have her new boyfriend in tow anyway! Ahhh well.... Link to comment
Phaser Posted November 28, 2007 Share Posted November 28, 2007 So none of your friends have her number? The host, DUDE DON'T STOP NOW. Link to comment
boo121 Posted November 28, 2007 Share Posted November 28, 2007 She likes you, get her number. I can't answer a lot because you gave me no specifics. The only thing i can think of, is the piggy back ride and you should have still given her 1, she wanted you to. But thats so insignificant Put it down to experience, playfully tease her a bit more next time. Link to comment
Dating Coach Posted November 28, 2007 Share Posted November 28, 2007 Don't quit, get her number, call her up, and ask her out. And why is it awkward to ask a girl for her number around other people? Who cares? People do this all of the time. Link to comment
Just-a-Girl Posted November 28, 2007 Share Posted November 28, 2007 She totally digs you - and do you have any idea how hot it is when a guys calls you out of the blue? She will be so flattered and impressed that you got her # from someone and sorta hunted her down. Entirely hot. Link to comment
confused_with_girls Posted November 28, 2007 Author Share Posted November 28, 2007 Thank you for the continued responses! I feel even more of an idiot now!; 1. For not making the most of my situation which everyone seems to think was very favourable 2. Because the party was actually about 5 weekends ago, and not 'last weekend' If I see her again, how do you think I should play things out bearing in mind it will probably a long time since the initial party? Would she have remembered me or is it only me that has been trying to replay every minute of the evening in my mind?! And surely it's too late to start asking around for her phone number isn't it? Thanks! Link to comment
Just-a-Girl Posted November 28, 2007 Share Posted November 28, 2007 Whoa, whoa, yes, too late to call her now...now it would be odd. You need to find out where this girl is going to be and get in there!! You better leave with her number next time, cause we do not want to hear any excuses if you don't!! LOL! Link to comment
confused_with_girls Posted November 28, 2007 Author Share Posted November 28, 2007 Thanks for the good advice (and saving myself from looking like a complete prat!) Now I just need to get my friend to get his friend to host some more parties... Link to comment
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