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My fiance and I have been engaged over a year now. At the moment, I'm in school and would like to wait to get married a year after I graduate or even when we can afford it and are actually living together. I don't think I could concentrate on school, work AND plan a wedding.


Am I being silly to wait? He thinks I don't love him since I don't want to get married right now. It's not that I don't love him, I just want us to live comfortably in our first years of marriage. Why is there have to be such a rush?! And anyways, I'm 20 and he's 21. We're pretty young still!


How long was your engagements anyone?

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I'm not married or engaged. BUT My cousins were engaged for 2 years before they got married, and were toether 6 years before that. I think long engagements are good as it gives you a chance to really get yourself organized, etc.


I'm a student as well, so I can definitely see where you're coming from, and don't think you're being inconsiderate at all. You want to take the time to focus on your as opposed to trying to juggle everything, and the extra time would only serve to strengthen your relationship. ANd I'm sure financially it would be tight as well.


Also, I think that you should be comfortable with the idea and the timing. That you are engaged demonstrates your commitment to him. This is something you need to talk to him about.

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I think at your age there is nothing wrong with a long engagement because both of you are trying to get yourselves established a little more. However, with people who are more firmly established and there are no other circumstances stopping the couple, then a long engagement smacks of a stalling tactic. In your case you have legitimate reasons so I think it is fine.

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Hi There,


Being in school is like a full time job, and being young I think you are the smart one to wait and plan for a wedding once you are finished with school. That way, hopefully you will both be working in careers where you can realistically afford to support each other, possibly look for a home, pay for a wedding (if a big wedding is what you want) and also, have a chance to grow and develop as a couple before walking down the aisle.


You have your whole lives together in front of you to be a married couple, what's another few years?

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