contacted him now i'm back to ok

[alwyzdreamin2004]

So a few days ago, I told you guys I broke No contact. but it made me realize i needed to get over him and since then i'm ok. Because he emailed me back and said he didnt know how he felt and stuff. i know we both need our space. were both sad, not mad, just sad. Ive read posts about should i contact him and then i just read one addressing them all, saying no. But I did. I texted him and said happy thanksgiving. nothing else, just that. he texted back and said you too. you know what..it wasnt a big deal to text him, because we both took it as "i'm thinking of you today" instead of freaking about it, about whether we should contact each other. I mean, I know he wouldn't have texted me if i hadnt first, but still not that big a deal.

Now last night, i was debating texting him and saying i'm not giving up on us. but i didnt text him that because i realize we both need to be ok for us to try again. I know we both do want to try again. I think hes just heartbroken right now and doesnt know what to do. but i dunno why i just typed all this but oh well. feel free to respond if you want to say anything.

[toshiba]

I think it's like pulling the band aid off slowly vs. ripping it off. Some people prefer one way, some the other.

 

Statistically if we look, failed relationships that are reignited rarely ever work. But yet, we want to try anyway. Given the fact that most relationships don't work over the long haul, one that has failed once already, has even higher odds to beat.

 

And often we're wanting to rekindle something that isn't even worth rekindling. Maybe he's selfish, maybe she flirts with other guys......but we try to rekindle it because it's familiar to us and familiarity brings us comfort.

[Iggy5129]

I just had a somewhat similar experience. I called my ex after about 2 weeks NC. Found out that he wasn't dating his rebound anymore and for some reason after hearing that I realized that I do not want him back anymore and I am more over it now than I was when I was trying very hard to maintain NC and thought he was dating someone else. I just realized all the crappy things he did to me before and after our relationship and just no longer feel the desire to be with him. NC has been extremely easy since then so in a way I am almost glad I broke it, although I sort of wish I didn't because I was really mean and made myself look bad. But oh well, live and learn.

[alwyzdreamin2004]

I think it's like pulling the band aid off slowly vs. ripping it off. Some people prefer one way, some the other.

 

Statistically if we look, failed relationships that are reignited rarely ever work. But yet, we want to try anyway. Given the fact that most relationships don't work over the long haul, one that has failed once already, has even higher odds to beat.

 

And often we're wanting to rekindle something that isn't even worth rekindling. Maybe he's selfish, maybe she flirts with other guys......but we try to rekindle it because it's familiar to us and familiarity brings us comfort.

 

Yeah, but I feel almost like I have a foresight and that we'll end up together. I dunno. But I'm usually right when I feel these things. I don't understand it. Maybe I'm psychic...half kidding/half serious...

[Zorba]

Statistically if we look, failed relationships that are reignited rarely ever work. But yet, we want to try anyway. Given the fact that most relationships don't work over the long haul, one that has failed once already, has even higher odds to beat.

I dunno about that. Now I'm not talking about those couples who are always breaking up, they seem to be doomed long term, but every single one of the couples I know who are really good together and have the best chance for the whole lifetime thing have had one major split. One example they were apart for 3 years. most were apart for over a year and nearly all of them went out with others in the interim. Some even fell in love with the interim partners.

[CatsMeeoow]

Congrats on realizing that you both need space. That texting him would have been a mistake. I would have given into that urge... and hence when my guy needed space I did anything but... I panicked... I overdid it... I didn't want to lose something that it took me so long to find.

 

Good for you...

 

Knowing that and writing here rather than contacting him was the RIGHT thing to do!

 

You two will be in touch again. Have faith that each of you need to sort out some things right now. Let him figure out what he needs.

 

Best of luck!