I have a paranoid roommate!

[savannahohsavannah]

I had a friend online whom I met a few times over the past five years, and we've been online friends for a while. I wanted to move back to the area where we're both from, I'd moved away and she'd stayed there, so she agreed to let me move in with her for a while during my quest for a job and housing.

 

Big mistake!

 

The things began happening right away. She'd ask me who was calling me. Or try to manipulate me into giving information, by making a statement that is really just a hidden question about who called. (She'd say, "someone called today about that job application you put in" and she'd point to the number on her caller ID, and of course, I knew they'd said absolutely NOTHING about a job, because it was a pal and I knew from her expression that her question was contrived.) That has kept on happening during the two months that I've been here, and I'm so frantic to get out: I've taken a house that is going to be expensive to maintain, as it uses oil heat. I figured the trade off is that I would be living by myself, and not have to deal with her.

 

She still treats me like a friend, and I've bent over backwards to be nice, but she creeps me out. I'm sorry, but psychiatric problems, when I see them in someone makes me want to run the other way. As a matter of fact I think that's the smart thing to do.

 

I've been through so much in dealing with this lady, how do I leave with dignity and CUT my ties without hurting her feelings???

 

Savannah

[Killasasparilla]

Just straight up tell her that she is being a bit too nosey.

[savannahohsavannah]

Thanks for that piece of advice, but I have experienced that one already and you are always on the verge of her having a screaming fit when that happens. I could just let her have one, true. But I don't want to listen to it, and she targets people who do not do what she wants. I had one woman, her friend, tell me that if I didn't move it was only likely to get worse. She seems to have a three month time frame to tolerate non children in her house.

 

It's a fiasco, me even being here. But until my house is ready on the fourth of the month, I am stuck. I do not want to make waves. She's a manipulator and evil. We have destroyers in our communities called sociopaths. One person in 30 is a sociopath, and they constantly lie and manipulate to get exactly what they want. When they don't get it, typically there is trouble for the victim. What makes it even worse, is that many women who have antisocial personality disorder (she has other traits too) are the charismatic type of socio. What this means is that she's likely to be believed, no matter how unrealistic her comments.

 

Sigh. Read The Sociopath Next Door, by Martha Stout.