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Confused about the breakup! Please Help!


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I am new to this forum but I really need some advice. My boyfriend of three years just broke up with me. He was in Iraq for five months and I supported him throughout his entire stay. He came home three months ago and things had a rocky start. It was a hard readjustment for us both. I guess we started fighting with each other over stupid things. He thinks I have not been happy but that is just not true. But I also thought things were getting back to "normal". Two weeks ago we planned a vaction together for January and also made plans to go his Marine Corps ball this weekend. To top it off he just rented an apartment that is attached to my parents house. (I still live with my parents). He told me he still wants to stay at the apartment even though it will be difficult because we won't be seeing each other. He said he hopes we can get back together one day but he is not promising me anything. I don't know what to do. I don't want this break up at all. He said he needs space and lots of it. What should I do????????????? I really feel like we belong together and this whole breakup is a big mistake. Please, I would appreciate any advice!

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Hi There

 

War can do strange things to people. You can be sure that he has seen a lot of things that has made him re-evaluate his life and made him think hard about what he wants and doesn't want. He surely considered he might not make it home, and the fact that he is now home is sort of like a second chance possibly for him.

 

You need to show understanding to him. The fact that he wants to stay around shows that he doesn't want to cut all ties with you, and that he is certainly unsure about what steps he really wants to take.

 

If you can, you should be there for him at this time. He surely loves you, and you should make sure he knows you love him. Also make sure that he knows you are there to support him, but do not make a big deal out of "his issues". If he wants to talk, he will want to talk - if not, you are there should he need you.

 

Could you do this?

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Thanks for the words of encouragment. I definitely want to be there for him and help him through whatever he is going through. I am happy he is staying in the apartment but I am also scared he will soon think it is too hard and leave.

I really want this to work out and I hope we will get back together. Thanks again for your advice.

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