Long Distance Headache

[achangingman]

I broke up with my gf 5 months ago; a month later she went for a 6 month internship in another country. Throughout that time she called me almost everyday, and was all for us getting back together again. So now we are back together again but all the phone calls have stopped! I can understand that phoning everyday can be unhealthy - especially for the phone bill!!! But phoning is her preferred means of communication. I, however, am big on the emailing. Its less costly - since we are both students.

Her initial reason for not emailing was that there was no email where she is staying, and use of the internet was not allowed where she was working. A month ago she eventually got connected at home and SHE suggested we meet online in the evenings. We did this for the first 2 days. Since then she has not been online. I asked her and she apologised, said she'd be there the next day - but, no such luck! I am a little stumped on how to handle this. Right now it has been over a week with no contact. The last 2 calls were 1) She needed a favour 2) she wasnt feeling too well and wanted me to cheer her up. I switch-off very easily if I think someone is not pulling their weight. Please advise.

[Mar]

I would let her know that you don't want to rack up anymore phone bills, and ask her if there's some reason why she's adverse to using e-mail. All the same things can be said, and it's definitely the cheaper means of communication. A call once in awhile is alright, of course, but for everyday chatting, there's no reason why, if she could make the times for phone calls, she can't sit at a computer!

 

 

Mar

[routerx]

I can tell you from experience that long distance relationships are tough on the heart and the mind. Sounds like you are pulling double-duty. Don't make demands on her. Just let it play out. If she is bad about contacting you, don't let her take you for granted, tell her your problems and if she doesn't change, move on. Don't pull your hair out. She may just be homesick and need someone to lean on when she's lonely.