A New Lease on Life

[miamimami1969]

Hello Everyone,

 

First and foremost I hope this finds everyone well. I haven't been on ENA in a while because I was going through a very tough time with a health issue. A lump was found in my breast. I had a lumpectomy done (surgery to remove the lump) and then I had to wait a grueling 10 days for the results. As you could imagine I felt like my life was in limbo. I couldnt make any plans for the future. All I kept thinking about was impending death. The situation with my ex became miniscule at this point. I was (and still am) in pain from where the incision was made. I just couldn't wait for the results. I was getting so anxious and nervous and I couldnt stay focused on anything.

 

Well I am happy to report that last night my surgeon informed me that all it was was fibrous tissue (scar tissue) that formed what appeared like a growth. I felt like jumping up and kissing that man!! I was (and am) so very relieved.

 

Its a shame what has to happen to a person sometimes to make them see that there are more important things in life than dwelling on "the ex".

 

I know many of you are going through a very rough time now. But just know this - It will get better with time! I know that the first few weeks are the absolute hardest and maintaing NC is brutal (this includes checking myspace, facebook, etc), but it must be done if you want to prevail. I know you have heard this many times over but it is true and I am living proof of it. I am already 3 months out of a 2 year relationship and with the help of a therapist, maintaining NC, and of course ENA and unfortunately dealing with this terrible health scare, it made me realize that life is just too short and precious to dwell on things that cannot be changed, fixed, etc. Be thankful for every day that you get out of bed and can walk around. Don't sweat the small stuff.

 

I have finally got to a place where I have made peace with my "ex" situation. I don't wish him any harm. I hope that he is happy and safe. I just need to move on with my life and know that the good lord has someone special in store for me. I am not a religious person by nature, but I put all my trust and faith in the good lord and ask him for strength and he guides me through every situation. This has also helped a lot in my recovery.

 

I am very proud of myself for making this progress within the last couple of months. It was slow to happen but it eventually left me where I dont really think/dwell on it as much anymore. BTW - I was starting to get over it even before my health scare. Just goes to show you that time helps a lot.

 

I wish everyone going through a breakup all the luck in the world. Be strong and put all of your trust in the lord. Believe me he will give you strength and guide you through it all. He did for me

[Supa_gurl]

Wonderful news! Health and healing! Happy for you.

[Coyote9]

Glad to hear your ok....and that you've made peace with your past relationship stuff Miami....I had my own health issues over the summer but like you am on the mend and feeling better.

[yuki]

I am very glad to hear the lump thing was a false alarm! An event like that really makes you put things into perspective, doesn't it? Life is such a precious gift and every breath we take is something to be grateful for. Thanks for sharing your story and cheers to your health!

[miamimami1969]

Thank you all for your kind thoughts and words.

 

Coyote - I am glad you are feeling better. Rememember without your health you dont have anything. Everything else is trivial. Believe me I learned that the hard way (unfortunately). I finally came to a place where I can say God (life) has something better in store for me. I just can't get myself all worked up any more for someone who clearly doesnt give a hoot about me or what happens to me. My mom made a good point in saying that "Aren't you glad he isn't in your life anymore" - "he wouldnt know what to do, say, feel, etc". He was so immature. He probably would of left me because he would of been scared not knowing how to handle the situation and that would of stressed me out even more. His immaturity would of shined through to the max.

 

Don't get me wrong I still do think of him from time to time but nothing close to where I was a few months ago. I've moved beyond that terrible period I went through.

 

I wish you all the courage and strength to prevail

[bubblyblonde11]

That is great news hun and glad your results were good too. Sounds like you are doing so well, I am really chuffed and inspired too.

 

Take good care of you

 

xxxxx

 

(((((hugs))))

[brokedownpalace]

Congratulations!

[Rochelle]

That was very uplifting and puts things in perspective for all of us, even if you have your health.

 

You make such a valid point that life is much bigger then dwelling in the pain of the ex. I am so glad you are ok but am even more excited for you that you had this insight and it's helped get you over the ex even more.

 

Thank you for sharing....it certainly has helped me set things straight in my own head again...

 

I really don't want to waste anymore energy on him...i will remember your story when i find myself getting angry or dwelling too long...

 

Ro

[brokedownpalace]

yes.. we all have to know the universal truths about life.. and one of them is simply this..

 

pain in this lifetime is inevitable.. its the way of the world, but suffering, thats a choice we make.

[mbird]

miamimami1969 I'm very pleased for you thats really releiving news. This kind of thing really puts things into perspective. The mind is such a very strange object.

 

Great news, start living.

[HajiMaji]

Thanks for wishing me good luck! Even though it was directed at everyone, it felt so sincere that it made me feel a little better.

 

I am glad to see your health is ok

 

Good luck with your recovery (physically and emotionally) also. I can see a lot of strength coming out of this post, so keep it up if you can!

[beeter64]

Great news. So glad to hear everything is okay. I had my own scare with a mammogram last year and it does put everything into perspective. Take care of yourself until your completely healed. Then go out an enjoy your new found peace.

[miamimami1969]

I want everyone to know that there definetely is life after the ex. It may not be easy in the beginning to see the light believe me I know, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. All seems bleak now but it well get better, trust me. Every lil bump in the road all seems trivial now that I went through what I went through with my health issue. You have to realize that there are more importnt things in life and beating yourself up about the ex is not one of them. Yes I will admit he does come into my mind from time to time and I do see triggers that make me think of him, but I don't feel nearly as bad as I did when it first happened, like the first few weeks -2 months.

 

Just know its gonna get better. You have to believe that. Just be strong and know it wont always be like this.

 

May god give you all the strength and courage to get through the bad times

[just M.E.]

Miami, I really happy for your good news, I have one of those fiberous lumps but they didn't biopsy it, guess it was clear enough on the ultrasound. Between that and the fibroids maybe I'm becoming a woody ol' tree

 

or as Mother Theresa said "God will not give me anything I cannot handle, I just wish he didn't trust me so much" (loosley quoted)

[miamimami1969]

just M.E.,

 

Thank you. After going through this scare I realized you cannot take anything for granted anymore. Life is just too short and precious to waste on petty things. I realize now that I have to make the most of it