Met with the ex today and was weird and sent a letter today.

[bubbamackdaddy69]

Hey it's me again. Posted 2 days ago about how my ex keeps calling me and wants to get together for coffee.

 

Well she called again today and she wanted to meet so we met this afternoon for coffee.

It was weird she was asking about the new girl I was dating and stuff like that and joking with me about if she was good in bed and such. It was awkward question so I kind of changed the subject and I let out something about it. I said that I find it hard talking to her (my ex) about my current relationship when I still have feelings for her. Well she talked about the guy she is still dating from 2 weeks after we broke up, this was 2 months ago and was telling me he was meeting up with him in about an hour to go to her place because her roomates were having a party. She even called him from her cell when we were together today?? She did leave the area though, but still? Anyways we hung out for about 2 hours and had small chit chat and stuff and that's it so I took off and she stayed there because she was meeting her new boyfriend at the bus stop later.

Why did I go meet her?? Man it hurt when I left..brings back some pain.. Well anyways i sent her a letter that she'll probrably get on Tuesday.. What do you guys think of it.?

 

Hello Sherry,

First off I'd like to say it was nice seeing you on Saturday. You looked very pretty by the way and I really like your hair like that. Hope everything is going well for you and I wish you luck with your job.

 

I was just thinking that maybe we should not see each other in person for a while as It is still hard for me as I still have strong feelings for you. I on the other hand would still like to talk to you on the phone whenever you like as I still love talking to you. Yeah I know I've been dating Monique for 3 weeks now and she's really nice but I just don't have that feeling for her. But when I see you I do have those feelings for you and it makes it hard for me to hold back my feelings. Remember when you said that it's too bad that I am serious into buying a house in the outskirts of town and thinking of growing up and having a family after we have broken up. The truth is that I always wanted that but I've explained to you why before I never really mentioned how I wanted it. Deep down I still want to fulfill those dreams and I want to do them with you. Time apart from the person that you love is something that makes your feelings for the other person grow stronger sometimes and in my case it is true very true as I had proof of it when I hugged you good-buy on Saturday, it felt so nice but also really hurt.

 

I want you to be honest with me Sherry. Do you have any feelings for me still? Deep down in your heart do you ever think about me at least once in a while? I know I do for you everyday. Everyday I think about you at the very least sometimes a lot. It's even harder when I listen to any country song and always think of you and what we can still have and funny to say everytime I hear any country song I think of your parent's kitchen drinking pepsi , smoking cigarettes, playing board games and talking with your family. I hope that I have given you at least a few happy memories when we were together because I know I have a lot of you. Oh yeah before I forget Rick says HI also. He said he misses bugging you, but you know he always did it with love.

 

Well anyways I will keep this short and say good bye now and want to wish you luck in whatever you do. You deserve it. How come you never ended up sending me that letter? Well here is a stamp so that you can write me back I put it in the envelope. One thing I would like you to do is to look deep down into your heart and express your true feeling for me either good or bad it doesn't matter because one thing that I have learnt after reading a couple of books on improving yourself and relationships is that you should never be afraid of taking chances if it is for the person you love and still think of. ---Yeah I know what your thinking, Jamie's reading books? Ha ha ha.

You can call anytime you like and please send me that letter or any letter. Take care

Oh yeah I know you always forgot our postal code. Here it is

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXx

 

Love Always,

Jamie.

[reinvented21]

Hey,

 

First of all, I think that youre letter was very well written. Let me ask you a few questions to stimulate youre mind. Do you think that you should be dating someone else right now? I mean, is it fair to her....and even more important is it fair to you? I think that you really care about youre ex, and I dont think you are over her. This new girl might develop feelings for you, and I dont think thats fair to either one of you. Another question is how did you feel about youre ex talking to this new guy??? I doubt you were tap dancing. My point is this, by sending that letter I think that you let youre ex know that she can walk all over you. I am not trying to upset you, but think of it like this. Her knew boyfriend is a rebound. She met him shortly after you two broke up and has been dating him since. Do you want youre ex back or do you just want to be friends? If you want her back, its a very bad idea to stay in contact with her while she is talking/dating this new guy. You cant miss someone who is always around. By telling youre ex to call you whenever, she is only going to alleviate any guilt/regret that the relationship is over. By talking to youre ex you are only prolonging the inevitable, which is more hurt. Now, some may say the letter was sweet. And I agree it was, but from a realistic perspective it may not have been in youre best interest. Take it from a guy who knows, women like mystery.....for now this is the new guy. Women like challenge...for now this is the new guy. By always being around for her you are being predictable. You are not being mysterious. You are not being a challenge. You are not allowing youreself to heal the pain any quicker. I feel for you. Youre intentions are good. Youre emotions are very strong. Whatever you choose to do, be careful and think wisely. I wish you the best of luck in this painful journey.

[bubbamackdaddy69]

Thanks reinvented21. I appreaiate your comments.

To answer your question, Yes I am not over her, and I guess I'm dating this new girl to boost my self-esteem..To be honest it's just for the sex. And she is at my place right now , new the girl that is... I like her but no feelings for her right now. And I agree that it is not fair to her and I should break the news to her as soon as possible..And for me..my feelings about her with the new guy just makes me wanna puke, seriously It really hurts... I haven't sent the letter yet , I was going to on Sunday but maybe I might re-think it... At this point I just don't know what to do... I love her and her family so much that I'm in stale mate right now..I don't know what to do... I've only had one other serious girlfriend before her and I got over the last one by just sleeping around.. Yeah I know that's not the best way to do it but at that point I thought so.

What should I really do?? Just cut all contact, in person and on the phone for months? The longest it has been in 2 months has been 10 days or so without talking to the ex... What makes it so hard that she wanted to marry me soo much and have my children but as stubborn as I was then I never told her how I truly felt. I've told her afterwards but I think she thinks I'm just saying that to get back with her and I'm not all that serious about it, but I really am...

So youo think I shouldn't send that letter?

[reinvented21]

Hey,

 

I think that you had good intentions with the letter, but I dont think it was the best idea for youre situtation. A couple things need to be mentioned. Self-confidence needs to come from the inside, not from anybody else. Always remember that. Dont rely on sex or another person to make you feel good about youreself. Take time out for youreself and work on true self confidence, that is what women find attractive...true self confidence. When you are confident and feel good about youreself, others do as well. As far as contact goes, at this point I dont think it matters. I think from the begginning of the breakup, no contact would have been youre best bet. I think now you just need to break off all contact,by phone, in person, or by letter, it doesnt matter. Break off contact for you. Its the best thing you can do for youreself. Remember she cant miss what is always around. Remember she is having fun with this other guy, while you play the doormat. Dont torture youreself. Youre not a ragdoll, you are a human being. You deserve the best. You may want to do an internal audit on youreself to examine youre feelings/emotions. Give youreself time to heal. Maybe one day she will come back, but until then allow time to heal youre wounds and reinvent youreself.

 

I wish you the best.

[bubbamackdaddy69]

Thanks for the reply again,

Man I'm stupid I sent the letter last night when I was drunk... It's not a harsh letter but I agree with you it is not the best thing to do right now.. What should I do now? I guess nothing really right? I know she's gonna call sometime this week and I'll just tell her to stop calling for a while..I'm not sure though